Bitter Alliance
by looneyluna
Summary: The war is over. Aang is dead, killed in the Avatar State. The Earth Kingdom is conquered and Fire Lord Ozai rules with an iron fist. Katara has survived and must suffer the attentions of Prince Zuko to protect her brother.Updated 0327.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Bitter Alliance

Author: Looneyluna

Summary: The war is over. Aang is dead, killed in the Avatar State. The Earth Kingdom is conquered and Fire Lord Ozai rules with an iron fist. Katara has survived and must suffer the attentions of Prince Zuko to protect her brother.

A/N – **Warning! There is questionable non-con in this story as Katara is unwilling to accept Zuko. But all is not what it seems. Mature content ahead!** Avatar: The Last Airbender belongs to Nickelodeon. No copyright infringement intended. This story is written for personal enjoyment only.

Act I – Bitter Ardor

Chapter One

--

I hate it when he's gentle. It only makes it worse. I lie there, my spirit half-dead, as he pulls the responses from my body that he wants. I have lost track of all time. His betrayal seems so long ago, but his cruelty is endless.

Zuko shudders above me and I feel the telltale sign of his release deep inside me. I pray he lets me go soon so that I may clean myself. It is the only way I can keep from conceiving his child. My hopes are crushed as he collapses on top of me, his breath hot against my neck.

He is already growing thick again. I would cry at the injustice, but I have no tears left. Aang is dead, killed years ago. Sokka is hardly alive, his injuries altering him forever. My brother is alive only because I please the Prince. Otherwise, we would both be with our mother and father in the spirit world.

"Say the words," Zuko rasps against my ear as he starts to move within me.

"I love you," I comply easily, knowing Sokka will suffer the punishment if I don't. I used to choke on the words, but now they come easily.

Zuko knows it isn't true, but he tries to pretend. As he tries to kiss me, I turn my head. He pauses, displeased with my show of rebellion. Pulling away, he rolls onto his back and tugs on my wrist.

With automated motions, I climb on top of him.

He hisses as I sink onto him. Reaching up, Zuko pleasures me and plays with the skin of my taught stomach. He thrusts upward, rubbing his masterful thumb across the juncture of nerves that I am helpless to control.

I have no recourse. I start to move on top of him. If I don't participate, he'll hurt Sokka. I close my eyes, willing the tears of desperation to dry. It angers Zuko when I cry. I clench my inner muscles around him, mimicking the rhythm of feminine release and trying to hurry him along, but he is not fooled.

He moves inside me with ease, prolonging my torment. His seed is trickling down the insides of my thighs, lending to the moisture that clings to our skin.

He feels the telltale sign of his seed escaping my body too and growls in frustration. Pushing me away, Zuko glowers at me. "I suggest you cooperate, Katara, lest your brother pay the price for your disobedience."

I put as much distance between him and myself as I can without getting off the bed. "I did what you asked of me," I reply softly. Hysterics will do me no good. "Am I to blame for the laws of gravity now?"

His golden eyes narrow, his lustful gaze raking my body possessively. "You know what I need from you and yet you refuse to give it to me."

I shiver under his gaze and I cannot help but stare at him in return. His body is sculpted and magnificent, more matured since when we first met. He is not ashamed of his body and does nothing to hide his aroused state from me.

"You use your bending to prevent what you deem complications," he husks, reaching for me.

I go limp, knowing better than to fight him. "I will never give you an heir. Why don't you use one of your concubines for that purpose?"

As he pulls me into his arms, I grab the sheets.

"Because only you will do, Katara," he whispers against my ear as he sidles up to me and claims me, intent on making me watch my disgrace in the reflection of the mirror across the room. I close my eyes.

"Open your eyes, my lady," he commands as he nips my earlobe. "Watch as I take you. Watch as I step closer to my heir."

A single tear slides sideways from my eyes.

"Your body has betrayed you," Zuko informs me softly. "The Fire Sages and your maids have tracked your cycle for the last year. If you do not conceive my heir in the next three months, your brother dies."

He bites the sensitive skin at the nape of my neck, lapping at it as he flows in and out of me. My tears fall freely as I fear for my brother.

"It's time you learn to live without hope," he moans against my skin. "The Avatar is gone. The cycle has been broken. Aang was foolish to think he could defeat my father. He was foolish to trust me. As I delivered him to the Fire Lord, I regained my honor. That is all I ever wanted."

"You are the foolish one," I retort, trying to still my traitorous body as it responds to his touch. "You are anything but honorable."

He chuffs with exertion, ignoring my barb. "Either way," he pants as he rocks inside me. "My father says I must sire an heir before I can ascend the throne." With calculated precision, he deepens our connection and spreads his seed within me.

He chuckles as I lose control of my body. He growls and turns my head, claiming my lips in a passionate kiss. "That's right, Katara. Enjoy yourself. Take me deep inside you. Welcome my seed into your womb." His hand covers my flat stomach.

"I hate you," I whisper.

--

Her disdain hits its mark and I hide my face so she cannot see my pain. I have done my best to protect her. I have done my best to protect her brother. My father watches my every move, leery of the son who delivered up the Avatar to him. No one was more surprised than I was when the Avatar fell at his feet. Now, no one is left to oppose my father.

Her body quivers around mine, signaling the pinnacle of her release. This must be done. The palace spies are probably watching us even now. All hope died with Aang and my beloved uncle.

Sliding from her body, I turn on my side and feign sleep. I wish I could tell her the truth – that I do all this to protect her and her brother. For now, I follow the order I was given – sire the next generation. I am not to leave Katara's side until she is with child.

The Fire Sages have predicted the coming of the Avatar, where and when, they are unsure. They have woven their mysticism around my father, convincing him that a child born of our line will become the next Avatar.

The cycle was broken when my father took Aang's life. With no one to oppose him, he is the ruler of all he sees. The Earth Kingdom is a shadow of itself, only small pockets of resistance proving to be minor annoyances to my father's will.

Katara sobs and I ache to reach out and comfort her. The child will complicate matters. Now I will have another to protect.

I feel my body stir again, a slave to the task at hand. The herbs I was given for the task make me ache for her. I clench my jaw and try to sleep. For now I must bide my time.

"I know," I reply, leaving a bitter taste in my mouth.

--

A/N – I haven't abandoned my other story, The Price of Peace. This is just a story that couldn't wait.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two – 

"I'm sorry, Sokka," I talk to my brother as though he understands me. I brush his wild hair out of his eyes, being careful not to touch the scar on his forehead he received two years ago.

I shift on the dirty floor next to him, feeling ill. My monthly cycle always makes me feel poorly. I have not conceived Zuko's child. I have never felt so helpless. Sokka's fate and mine rests on the fate of another – an innocent child who I may or may not conceive.

Sokka's blue eyes stare at the ceiling of his cell, seeing nothing. He mumbles occasionally, but it's nothing I recognize.

Sometimes I wonder if I am doing the right thing, selling myself to keep us both alive. What kind of life is this? Even if I do manage to conceive a child, I have no delusions. They will never allow me to raise it. They will corrupt it. Once born, I will be discarded.

With such a bleak future, perhaps death would be preferable.

"Appa, yip yip!" Sokka shouts, positioning his body as though he is flying the giant bison.

Patting his arm, I lean against him and close my eyes, imagining that I am flying with him.

--

"You have failed," my father hisses. His irritation and the flames behind him rise. "She bleeds."

Inwardly, I cringe, but not on the outside. I show reverence and bow. "There is still time," I reply. "We have two more months. She knows the risks. She has proper incentive."

"You should bed others to ensure my line is carried on," the Fire Lord suggests.

It is best if I not argue with him. I have studied the science. If I were to bed others, I would not be any use to Katara. Her usefulness has waned in my father's eyes. "I thought the child must be born of two benders."

The fire behind my father licks the ceiling as his anger feeds the flames. I humbly avert my gaze and kowtow to him. His demands are unreasonable, his descent into insanity becoming more and more apparent.

"Do not leave the Waterbender's side until she has conceived your child," he commands.

"Yes father," I mumble, backing away as I recognize the dismissive quality in his voice.

As I leave the throne room, I contemplate my next move. My father is right not to trust me. I am plotting to overthrow him, but that is all I am able to do right now – plot.

I make my way to her brother's cell. I know the path all to well. I visit it often, making certain my orders are followed. Unfortunately, my orders cannot supercede my father's. I play like I torture him, but I never touch him. She would never forgive me. I doubt she ever will.

I hear her as I approach his cell and I stop at the door, not wanting to disturb them. The palace spies won't dirty themselves with such common areas, but I still can't take that chance.

"Do you remember, Sokka?" she asks softly. "Do you remember the time we spent in the swamp?"

I lean against the door and listen to her reminisce.

"Yue," her brother whispers softly.

I learned while traveling with them that Yue was a Northern Water Tribe Princess that Sokka had fallen in love with. She is now the Moon Spirit.

"I was so sure I saw mom." Katara carries the conversation as though it is an actual two-sided one. "We'll see her soon."

Her voice sounds resigned and sad. Perhaps I have overestimated Katara's will.

"It will take some time for me to get the poison," she plans. "I only hope I am not with child by then. I don't think I can survive the responsibility of two deaths."

I am shocked as I listen to her plan her and her brother's death.

"I'll…" her voice quivers "…make it quick. I promise. Then I will drive an ice dagger through his heart when he least expects it."

I can bear no more. Listening to her plan is driving me insane. Yanking the door open, it bounces with the force I exert.

She jumps to her feet and takes up a fighting stance.

"I think it best to keep assassination plans to oneself, Katara," I hiss as I slowly approach her. "They are much more effective that way."

Sokka snorts in amusement, not understanding the gravity of the situation.

This may be the only chance I have and I seize the opportunity to ally myself with the woman I love. Glancing over my shoulder, I look for spies. I see only a dark hallway, but it does not mean they are not listening.

I stomp to the bureau and pick up the water pitcher, smashing it on the floor in a fit of rage. The water glistens on the floor in open challenge.

"There you go, Katara," I challenge her. "There's some water for you to bend! Bend it into an ice dagger!" I rip my tunic open, exposing my bare chest. "Drive the dagger into my heart."

Her eyes flash, accepting the challenge, but her gaze quickly falls to her brother who no longer has the sense to move out of harm's way.

I crowd her, grabbing her forearms and pulling her against me. "Go ahead. End my agony! Kill the man who is trying to save you," I rasp softly against the shell of her ear.

I pin her against the wall, holding her hands above her head. I move against her like an ardent lover in case someone is watching. "I can no longer suffer alone," I sigh, barely able to hear myself speak.

Katara groans.

"Do you think this is easy for me?" I drop her hands and pull her hips against mine, playing the role of dutiful son. In the shadows, they can't tell we are fully clothed.

She whimpers.

With restraint, I bite her earlobe. "I try to protect you and Sokka the best I can. The spies never rest. They are always vigilant."

I moan as if in the grips of passion.

Her nails bite into my shoulders.

A shadow crosses over us and I curse, hastily pulling away from her and "straightening" my clothes. "What is it!" I ask, my voice husky with need.

"Your father wishes to see you," a voice announces from the doorway insistently.

I send a scathing glare over my shoulder. "Tell him, I am following his orders! I am not leaving the Waterbender's side."

"Very well, Prince Zuko."

--

TBC – Isn't insomnia great? I get so much written in times like these. I hope to post often, but tomorrow is Monday and I have a full week of work ahead of me. Unfortunately, I don't get paid to write fanfiction. Although, my husband thinks I should. Ha ha! The reviews are greatly appreciated! They really are better than money. You all rock!

Chapter edited for a time line reference 8/1/06. This story is based heavily upon the idea that Sozin's comet came early and set the group back a couple of years. My apologies for the confusion. The next chapter should explain what happened.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three –

I hear every tick of the clock as it marks my time in this hell. Days have past since Zuko came across me in Sokka's cell, plotting to kill his father. He still doesn't know. It is his father's heart I wish to drive an icicle through, not his.

No matter what Zuko has done…what he continues to do … I could never kill him. There was a time that I loved him. There was a time that he loved me. Those times are long gone.

I am conflicted, his behavior and words befuddling me. For a moment in the cell, I thought I saw the old Zuko – the one who had begrudgingly befriended us all, the one who had become my lover. I was obviously wrong.

These last few days have been a torment for me. True to his word, Zuko has not left my side. He follows his father's orders like an obedient son. We have slept together like brother and sister, hardly touching and barely speaking to one another.

He pretends with me now, no longer forcing me to accept him. His actions confuse me. Is he toying with me? Setting me up for something even more horrible than what has already been?

Covertly, I watch as he writes letters of business. Tonight, he will have me. The moon is full, my monthly cycle of fertility at its zenith. I shall lie there and try to relax. I hear it helps when trying to conceive. I must allow his touch to save Sokka.

There were times I craved his touch. Even then he would tease me and make me beg.

_The rarity of a bath was something special in those days. War raged around us, but we found the time for such a novelty._

As always, Zuko left the group, walking upstream for some privacy. His uncle was the same way often bathing after everyone else was finished.

As Sokka, Aang, and Toph splashed around like demented otters, I stole away, my curiosity getting the better of me.

I watched Zuko bathe, hidden in the reeds and jealous of the water as it poured over his body. He ran his hands over his body, rubbing the grime of days of travel away. As he went through the motions of cleansing himself, I did not notice him getting closer.

"Would you like to touch me, Waterbender?" he taunted, pushing the reeds to the side and discovering my voyeurism. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me into the open.

I fought him at first, ashamed of my curiosity and embarrassed that I wanted to feel his touch.

As I settled against him, it was as though he could not catch his breath. His breathing was ragged and his flesh was hard.

"Are you curious, Water Tribe girl?" he mocked, rocking his naked flesh against my thigh. "Do you want to know what a man's touch feels like?"

Regaining some semblance of dignity, I retorted. "No, thank you. I'm sure your uncle prefers his women older."

In his fit of laughter, Zuko let me go. 

I will never forget that night. That is the night everything changed.

_Fire rained down from the heavens._

Sozin's comet had arrived early, striking at those who had ever opposed the Fire Nation's will. Aang railed at the injustice of it all. We still thought we had a week before we set out for the islands of the Fire Nation.

One lousy week!

As the fireballs fell from the sky, they struck without mercy, killing Iroh and Appa. Everyone else was able to seek shelter in a nearby cave.

But the world wasn't covered in caves and most of the people had no where to hide.

Everything changed that night. Aang's grief over Appa and the world crippled him. Zuko fell ill with fever – a fever I could not cure.

We survived for three years, finally able to pull things together and complete the journey to face Zuko's father. 

--

I sigh, my hand shaking as it hides the letter I have written for Katara. The past two years have been an agony for us all. I've done my best to keep her and Sokka alive. I don't know what happened to Toph. The earth swallowed the Earthbender as Aang tried to kill my father.

She doesn't realize everything I've done – everything I've overcome to get this far.  
I take a risky chance with this letter, hoping to calm her and make her strong.

Make no mistakes. We will still have to play the parts for the spies. I close my eyes and think back to a time where we didn't have to act.

_As my father wielded the comet like a deadly sword, I fell ill. I don't know how to explain it. It was like I was somehow connected with him, harnessing the power of Sozin's comet and destroying my enemies with a mere thought._

The fever consumed me. As I took shelter in the caves, I could feel the fire rain searching for me. He meant to kill me. Of that, I am sure.

If it weren't for Katara, I would have died.

I don't know how long I had the fever. I just remember waking up and finding how the world had changed. Like the others, I sank into a depression, grieving over the death of my uncle and vowing to seek revenge against my father.

After the influence of the comet waned, we decided to continue the journey. With Appa gone, we had to secure a ship. It took days to cross the waters to my homeland – days for Katara and I to grow closer.

It was then that I took her maidenhood, becoming her lover and confidant. I listened to her fears and hid my own.

When Aang fell at my father's feet, I did the only thing I could.

I lied.

I told my father of my duplicity and how I had lured the Avatar to his lair. Sokka was wounded. Katara was too. I played to my father's cruelty, insisting that I keep the prizes of my tenuous journey.

Delivering the Avatar to my father had condemned me to a life of servitude – a life I would gladly forfeit if I could.

I shuffle papers around the desk, mindful of the servants and guards nearby. Standing, I palm the letter and approach my beautiful captive.

She shies away from my touch.

Her robe gaps open, offering me an enticing glimpse of her skin. As quickly as I can I slip my letter into the fold of material. "I expect you to be ready and willing when I return," I issue the command and walk away, hoping my letter explains everything.

--

TBC

A/N – I am hoping to update this story every three to four days. On a painful note, I've overextended my hands and must take a break from typing for a day or two. Enjoy the story! As always reviews are greatly appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4

Summary – Katara reads the letter. Zuko carries out his duty.

A/N – Many thank yous to Spleef for going over this and pointing out the rough parts. It is greatly appreciated! I also owe so much to Moncapitan! He allows me to bounce ideas off him. He challenges me with questions that only make my stories better. You rock!

Thanks to all who have reviewed. I know this story is dark, but I felt that I needed to address a scenario where the bad guys won. So, here it is. It pained me to kill Iroh and Aappa. I struggled to find a place in this story, but they just didn't fit. Aang's death is vital to the plot. I do apologize to any readers for not putting character death warnings.

**Warning! This chapter is edited for mature content.**

--

Chapter Four –

I clutch the letter to my breast and watch him leave. Some of the servants and guards leave with him while the others stay focused on me. Confused and numb, I make my way to the washroom, glaring at the servant girl who tries to follow me.

They know better than to mess with me when I am close to water.

Closing the door behind me, I lean against it. I hear only the sounds of my raspy breath and heart pounding. Looking around the washroom, I ascertain that I am truly alone. It's a rarity, but it is possible.

With haste and dread, I open the letter and wonder what cruel joke the Prince is playing on me now.

_Katara,_

_I have little time and less courage these days. If you do anything, please read this letter in solitude and destroy it once you do for you and I are watched at all times. _

_I know you think me a traitor to our cause. I am not. The fever weakened me. When Aang died…_

_I know it looks like I betrayed you all, but I did not have the strength to fight my father. So I did the only thing possible to protect you. I lied…pretending to be something I'm not. I convinced my father I was loyal to him all along. _

_The look on your face will be forever branded in my soul when you learned of my 'treachery.' I've done everything I know of to keep you and Sokka safe. It has been a difficult path to walk, convincing my father to let me keep my 'war prizes.'_

_The guards are watching me. They draw closer with each line I write. There is so much more to tell you, but I haven't the time. _

_But know this! I love you! I can't remember a time I did not love you. You must be strong! Believe in me! I will save you and Sokka. Say nothing to me. The walls have ears that bleed with rumors. One rumor can destroy everything I've worked toward. _

_Am I a fool to hope that you can feel for me what I feel for you? One sign from you will strengthen me tenfold. My darling Katara, I must go._

_Zuko _

My heart pounds as I place the letter in a basin of water. My eyes scan the words of hope as the water washes the ink away. If only I were a Firebender I would burn the letter.

Can it be true? Can fate be so cruel?

I hear a shuffling of feet on the other side of the door and panic, bending water into icicles and throwing them at the door in warning. Only a few pierce the wood, but my warning is taken at face value and no one enters.

The water in the bowl is now black. Pulling the paper from the water, I twist the water from it and begin to rip the paper up. I rip it into the tiniest pieces I can. I move quickly, walking to the drainage grate and pulling it up.

I throw the paper into the hole and summon the black water from the bowl, flushing the evidence down the drain. With an economy of motion, I bend more water from the pipes, sweeping my element into the basin to clean it.

Setting the grate into its place, I stand and take a steadying breath and ready myself for the intimacy I will share with Zuko.

--

Warily, I approach the shelter of the shadows. I know not if she read the letter or if it was confiscated. All I know is that she is waiting for me. The sun has set -- my other duties of state settled moments ago.

I undress as I approach the bed, pulling the sash of my robe loose and shrugging out of it. I can see Katara's outline on the bed. She is still -- possibly asleep. I sit on the bed and lean against the headboard, the wariness of my life seeping into my bones and claiming my youth and vigor.

I sigh. Even if I were to pretend to take Katara, I would still wake her.

But then I feel it – her hesitant touch upon my thigh. She is not asleep. I lie down, moving the covers out of the way and gathering her in my arms. As always, I feel my body respond to hers.

I exhale a sharp hiss through clenched teeth and give myself to her.

Eagerness overcomes gentleness. With an aggressive huff, I claim her gasp of surprise as I seal my lips over hers.

"Mine," I growl against her lips. She silently welcomes my touch as she arches into my hand.

I need her.

As I loom over her, the moonlight from a nearby window illuminates her eyes. Instead of the disdain I have grown accustomed to, I see worry and confusion.

Instead of kissing her, I suckle the pulse point of her neck and make my way toward her collarbone. I fan the embers of her long-dormant desire.

Katara arches her back, offering herself to me. I take full advantage of the maneuver, lavishing her flesh as she gasps and groans. As I finish, I lick and nip my way to her stomach, peppering the flesh with light kisses. This is where our child will rest.

As much as I wish to spare her the pain, I am powerless to prevent my desire for her. My father's order must be fulfilled. Katara will carry the future of the Fire Nation…and the world. Placing my seed in her womb will buy her some time. It will buy us some time.

I want to cry out as I claim her. I want to tell her how much I love her, but I bite my tongue and drive toward ecstasy. The cradle of her body welcomes me and tears slide from my eyes, mingling with the sweat from my brow.

The sound our movements echo in the room as we silently keep words of love or endearments out of this union. The spies cannot see us in the dark, but they can hear.

I feel her welcome the little death. With an anguished groan, I follow her into oblivion, praying that my seed will take and give us the time I need to see Katara and Sokka safe.

--

TBC

A/N – Please accept my apologies for the delay in posting. Not only are my hands crap, but my laptop died last night. Sniff! Actually, the power supply died. I have a new one on order. It should arrive on Monday. For now I have to share my husband's desktop. And that is not as easy as it sounds. Ha ha!


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five –

I hold onto the wall as I make my way in the darkness toward Sokka's cell. I check on him daily, trying to bring him some comfort. I cross my arm protectively over my stomach, silently praying for deliverance. The last week has been difficult and confusing.

Zuko only comes to me in the cover of darkness, taking me to heights I have only realized with him – the bittersweet moments leaving me bereft.

I hear footsteps ahead of me and I quickly retreat, moving to the side of the narrow corridor. A person dressed in rags brushes past me.

"Pardon me," I say as I realize it is an Earth Kingdom peasant who had been granted permission to visit their loved one.

"The earth is forgiveness," a soft voice replies and the person limps away.

A sense of dread clutches my heart and I rush to Sokka's cell, only to find him sitting against the wall, vacantly smiling toward at the doorway.

Leaning against the doorway, I watch the man who is now a shadow of my brother. I have tried to heal him, but his injury perplexes me and it is beyond my capabilities.

Sokka rocks back and forth, much like a child. His clothes are tattered and torn, but he is alive. He should be my guiding light in all of this, but my brother is the darkness. He is the anchor that weighs me down to this life. If it weren't for him, I would have fought harder.

I would have fought to the death.

Even nowI struggle to control my thoughts. I dream of the way things were, my life at the South Pole. I close my eyes and picture the nighttime sky – how crisp and clean the air was.

Tears well up in my eyes and I weep openly, wiping the tears away as they fall. Guilt is my constant companion. I survived. The others did not. Aang's sweet, gentle countenance always provided me with a sense of comfort. Toph's acerbic ways usually made me smile. I had never met someone so determined to push people away.

"Rocks!" Sokka shouts, pounding the dirt on the floor as if he can read my mind. He scoops up a pile of dirt, forming it into a mud cake. "Toph!" My brother motions to his creation.

Sniffling, I sit next to him and play in the dirt with him. I mold another pile and smile through my tears. "And Aang."

Sokka smashes my creation. "Dead!" He pats his creation on its muddy head. "Toph!"

I pat his dirty hand reassuringly. "Yes," I whisper. "It looks just like her."

--

I pace back and forth between the courtyard and the dungeon, lending to the appearance that I have followed Katara here. People mill about in the distance, scrounging for the basic necessities of life. My mere status prevents them from approaching me. They would never dare approach me.

I enter the atrium of the dungeon because I cannot stand the sight of their suffering. If only the Avatar had survived. If only he had defeated my father. I shake my head trying to clear the depressing thoughts. This is my reality now.

The door leading to the main stairway opens and a short Earth Kingdom peasant limps through. My keepers are outside, not wanting to sully themselves with the rancid air of this place. I look away as she limps toward me.

The peasant is covered in rags and wears a hood for what purpose I do not know. The stench reaches me before the person actually does. Unlike the dungeon itself, the atrium has no flooring and I dig my booted toe into the ground. But my obvious attempt of ignoring the peasant goes unnoticed.

"The Earth is very forgiving," a young feminine voice speaks to me. "It heals, even as the fire consumes it. But the fire must seek forgiveness."

I clear my throat and step away.

"Do you seek forgiveness?" she asks as she grabs my sleeve.

I have no time to answer her as the ground beneath my feet gives way. Clawing at air, I seek to escape, but I am falling. I struggle against the woman's hold on my sleeve.

As soon as my feet touch the ground I crouch low and ready myself for battle. But the ground beneath me has other plans. I am knocked to the ground and held there, rocks pressing against my neck and chest. I can hardly breath.

Light illuminates the room as torches are lit and I see a two people – the peasant and a Firebender.

The peasant throws her hood off and leans close to me. "Tell me why I shouldn't kill you right now, you fucking traitor!" she hisses with contempt in a voice I barely recognize.

The rocks constrict around me and I struggle to breathe. "Toph," I rasp, trying to struggle free.

"You fucking bastard!" she rails, kicking the rocks that cover my body. "How could you do it? What kind of sick fuck does that to his 'friends?'"

I recoil as she slaps the scarred side of my face.

"My father…" I wheeze, trying to explain. The rocks crush me.

"Oh, don't worry about your father," she hisses and spits at me. "I'll make sure your daddy gets pieces of you to cremate."

I try to bend. I struggle to free myself, but it is useless. As I realize my death is close at hand, I worry about Katara. "Help…"

Toph slaps me again.

"He has information," the Firebender growls. "You're killing him!"

Telling her accomplice to be quiet, Toph eases the Earth's hold on me. She grabs hold of my queue and yanks it. "You sick son of a bitch. How could you do this to Katara and Sokka?" she demands an answer as she slams my head to the ground.

Pain grips me and darkness encroaches upon me. Even though the Firebender wants me alive, I know Toph means to kill me. "Help them," I gasp. "Help…Sok…ka! Ka…tar…a!

She yanks on my queue again, lifting my head and unknowingly providing me with a moment of air.

"Trying to keep them safe!" I blurt, tears streaming down my face. "It's all I can do!"

Toph growls and the rocks around my neck grow heavier.

"Never betrayed…" I exhale painfully. "I love…her!"

"Toph!" the Firebender growls. "Release him!"

The rocks around me shudder and fall to my sides. I roll over, clutching my sides and what I know are broken ribs. I taste copper in my mouth as I cough up blood.

"Fuck off, Jeong Jeong!" Toph stomps away and leans against the nearby wall.

"We need him alive, Earthbender!" The Master Firebender states simply and moves to pull me up. "Don't try anything, Prince Zuko or I'll let her kill you."

--

TBC

A/N – I must thank Spleef and Moncapitan for their help on this chapter. The next chapter should be up soon. With the miracle of drugs, I keep typing. I've also had the last six days off from work, but I have to back tomorrow. Sniff! Thanks to all who have reviewed. I normally answer all reviews, but I can't on some of them because there is no return email address.


	6. Chapter 6

**Warning! This chapter is edited for mature content. **

Chapter Six –

As I sit next to Katara, I rest my hand on her taut belly, praying to Agni that my seed has taken root within her. I long to tell her that Toph is alive…that there is hope for us all.

_After being healed by a Waterbender, Toph and Jeong Jeong took me into a cavern that looked like a medium-sized village. People pointed at me, some spitting while others threw rocks. They shouted epithets, venting their anger of being driven underground. _

_I bowed my head, ashamed of my own weakness and cowardice. I bided my time, waiting for them to reveal what they wanted of me and plotting my escape. I had to return to Katara. _

"_I never betrayed you," I whispered to Toph, whose grip on my arm tightened. _

"_Shut the fuck up!" she hissed, almost jerking my arm out of its socket. _

"_I love her," I tried to plead my case, but Toph hit me upside my head so hard that I saw spots. "If you do anything, please go back for Katara and Sokka. Save them as you have saved me."_

_Her grip on my arm tightened painfully, but I made no move to resist her. _

"_Saved you?" she scoffed. "Is that what you think I did?"_

"_Toph!" Jeong Jeong growled in warning as we entered a mud hut. "He is baiting you. Do not speak to him any more."_

_I was tossed onto the ground in the middle of what appeared to be a damp cell. "What do you want?" I addressed Jeong Jeong, finally realizing where I'd seen his face before – on Fire Nation wanted posters. _

"_Information, of course," the Firebender stated simply. "Then you will be executed."_

_The news did not surprise me. "I will give you whatever information you have in exchange for Katara and Sokka."_

"_You are in no position to negotiate," replied Jeong Jeong. _

"_There are two innocent lives at stake," I pleaded. "Possibly three! My father has charged me with siring a child, possibly the next Avatar."_

"_The Avatar is dead," the man said sullenly. "The cycle was broken."_

_I shifted uncomfortably, my shoulders aching as I pulled on the bindings. "The Fire Sages have predicted his return, born of two benders before the end of the winter solstice." _

"_Aang is dead!" Toph's voice cracked with emotion. "And you're to blame!"_

_As I prepared to receive another blow from my former friend's rage, a soft breeze caressed my cheek. An old woman dressed in yellow and orange robes approached me, shuffling her feet as she did so. _

"_Be careful, Mahari," Jeong Jeong warned the old woman. "He is regaining his strength. I feel the fire within him."_

"_You are an Air Nomad," I observed, taking in the old woman's appearance. A spark of hope leapt to life in my saddened soul. There was something about seeing her robes that eased the ache that had settled over me. _

"_No," she replied. "I was born into an Earth Kingdom home, but have adopted the customs of the Air Nomads. I am of the earth and air. I have water within my body and a fire within my soul. I wear the robes of the Air Nomads so that people do not forget. It is so easy to forget. _

"_The people have forgotten what the sky looks like," the woman continued, clutching my chin and looking into my eyes. "They have forgotten hope. Much like you have."_

_I felt tears spill down my cheeks as I gazed into her soul – a soul so much like my uncle's. I listened to her words, embracing my grief over the last few years, letting her wash the guilt away that had crippled me for so long. _

"_He is not our enemy," Mahari stated after gazing into my eyes. "He is the protector of the people, the one who will make things right. We must return him immediately. If the one who balances him is harmed, his life is forfeit."_

"_What!" Toph raged._

"_Silent, Earthbender," the sage scolded her, but continued to seek answers in my soul. "He is tied to his father, the depths of his sire's insanity draining his strength. He was powerless, but no more." _

_Mahari smirked, smoothing her palm along my scarred cheek. "But I give him hope."_

"_Yes," I whispered._

"_We must help him if we are to restore the balance," the old woman stated, moving away and righting her robes. _

_After having convinced them of my sincerity for their cause and my willingness to betray my father and nation, they released me. They realized that a spy would be more useful than a dead Fire Nation Prince._

_I only made one demand of them – that they help me get Sokka and Katara to safety. I insisted that Sokka be saved first, knowing that my lover would never leave her brother behind. _

_It would be a tricky venture, getting him out of his cell and into the earth. I hid the mix of herbs that the mystic gave me in a small niche of loose stone – a hiding place I had discovered as a child. When the time was right, I would give Sokka the herbs. _

_When I returned, my father questioned me thoroughly. He was suspicious of my absence and angry that I had neglected "the Waterbender."_

I now bear the punishment of his wrath on my back. I am tired, but I cannot sleep. The pain of the fire whip still stings my flesh. I wince as I try to get comfortable.

"What is it?" Katara murmurs sleepily. "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing," I reply softly.

She touches me, her hands seeking the flesh of my sex.

Smacking her hands away, I lie down on my side, facing away from her. "I'm not in the mood. Go back to sleep."

--

I smell blood and touch his back, my hand encountering the evidence of his father's cruelty. "What happened?"

He sits up and moves away from me. "What do you care?" he asks.

I hear the pain in his voice and move to gather some water. "I can heal you."

With a feral growl, he backs me against the wall. "Don't touch me, Water Witch!" he commands cruelly. "If I want anything from you, I'll take it."

His words scare me. His breath is against my neck as he leans into me.

"Remember the walls," he whispers close to my ear, reminding me of the spies who haunt our every move.

I push him away gently, then stomp across the room and turn the lever to increase the flame on a nearby lamp. I pour water from the pitcher into the basin and summon the liquid around my hands.

Approaching him, I touch his back and send forth the healing properties of my element. "Believe me, Prince Zuko," I say scathingly. "If it were up to me, I would let you suffer. But I need your seed."

I run my hands and water across his back, hearing his gasp of pain as the skin grafts back together. "Thank you," he whispers.

There is motion in the shadows and the sound of someone clearing their throat. The fear that that had become my constant companion roars its ugly head. What if the observer had heard his words of gratitude?

As if Zuko realizes his mistake, he turns on me, grasping my wrists and pushing me against a pillar. He tears my robe open and lifts one of my legs. I can feel his arousal against my stomach as he pushes his trousers down and pretends to conquer me.

"You want my seed?" he hisses against my ear. "Then take it."

--

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven –

I stare at the crimson streaks on my underclothes, and tears well in my eyes. How can this be? I have welcomed Zuko's attentions nightly. There is a movement off to my side and I hurriedly hide my shame. Undoubtedly, it is a spy who has run off to report my condition.

Fear clogs my throat and I gag, losing the remnants of my last meal. I have to hurry. I have to get to Sokka before my keepers find out that I have not conceived the heir to the Fire Nation's throne. I won't let them beat him again. It isn't his fault. It is the fault of fate.

I change my clothing quickly, determined to beat the spies at their own game. They won't harm Sokka as long as I am with him. I will not leave his side again. Zuko can just come down to the cell and carry out his "duty" there.

Pulling my hair back, I rush out the door and down the hall past the palace guards and into the frigid air. I cover ground quickly, becoming winded as I reach the prison. I enter the atrium and see the door to the corridor open.

Panic seizes my already frayed nerves, and I find myself rooted to the spot. I hear the low murmur of voices in the corridor grow louder as they approach the open door.

"Do you understand my directions?" My lover's voice was low, a panicked whisper.

"Yes, Prince Zuko," a guard replied.

The heavy iron door creaks open all the way and Zuko walks through, coming to an immediate halt as he sees me. "You shouldn't be here, Katara," he says to me, his brows knitted together in anger or anguish, I cannot tell.

I make no reply, too afraid for my brother. I look past him and see two guards struggling with something. I step toward the group of men, intent on killing anybody in my way, including Zuko. "Get out of my way," I growl lowly.

"Leave now, Katara." The prince blocks my way. I see fear in his eyes and try to move past him, but he catches me and pulls me away from the entrance. I struggle against him, needing to assure myself that my brother is okay.

"Let me go!" I twist in his arms, scratching at him in defiance of his order. I stumble away from him, catching myself on the wall. I see the burden the guards are struggling with.

It's a covered body.

Zuko tries to grab me again, but I dodge his attempts. My rage consumes me, and the nearby plants of the atrium shudder as I call the water from them.

The guards drop the body and take defensive stances. The blanket yields to momentum and gravity, falling to the ground in a pattern that partially revealsits secret – my brother's body.

"No!" Zuko grabs my arms and forces them behind my back.

--

It wasn't supposed to happen like this. Katara wasn't supposed to be here to witness the removal of Sokka's body. "Pick up the body and bury it in the way of the Earth Kingdom people!" I commanded as I struggle to keep Katara from harming the guards.

"Yes, Prince Zuko," the guards answer in unison as I tighten my hold on my lover.

One of the guards grabs one of Sokka's feet and starts to drag him on the ground toward the exit.

Katara hisses indignantly and starts to fight me again. She cries out in pain as I twist her arm higher. No matter how much I want to embrace her and comfort her, I know I must move forward with the charade. Sokka's life hangs in the balance.

The herbs I gave him have slowed his respiration and heartbeat to make it appear that he is dead. If the antidote is not delivered in the next few hours, the concoction will kill him. I must ensure that he is "buried" quickly so that the Earthbenders can pull him into their underground lair and administer the cure.

"Pick him up!" I growl in warning, mindful of Katara.

"Please." Her voice is a faint whisper as she goes limp in my arms.

I have no time to explain the delicacies of the deception to her. My heart aches as her pain consumes her. "Bury him quickly," I instruct, the words sticking in my throat, words that will condemn me in Katara's eyes.

"Cover him with earth," my voice rasps with emotion. "Trap his soul before it gets away."

Katara rears back, her head connecting with my chin. "You bastard! You goddamn bastard! How could you?" she rails, breaking my grasp and turning on me.

Her hand connects with the flesh of my face and I feel her cold rage.

"Prince Zuko?" One of the guards walks toward us as I wrestle Katara to the ground.

I wince as her knee connects with my thigh. "Carry out my orders now!" I shout at the guard, clasping my lover's wrists above her head and pinning her to the ground.

The guard backs away and the gate of the atrium shuts behind him.

Katara spits in my face and bucks wildly against me.

"Katara, please!"

She butts her head forward and I hear the cartilage and bone of my nose break. I reel back in pain and shock. Flipping onto her stomach, Katara tries to crawl away from me, but I catch her ankle and hold her.

I pray to Agni that no one is around as I press my body against hers and pin her to the dirty floor. "He isn't dead!" I hiss in her ear, wiping the blood from my nose away. "He isn't dead!"

She stills beneath me – whether from exhaustion or from my words, I do not know. She is breathing heavily and moans as if in pain. I roll off her and wince as I wipe at the flow of blood from my nose.

"Toph will take care of him," I mumble nasally, looking from side to side to make sure no one is around. "There's so much to tell you, but I can't."

She moans again, curling into a ball and clutching her stomach. It is then that I notice the blood on her clothing. The implications torture me.

"Katara." I feel tears prickle the back of my eyes. "Oh, Agni! I am so sorry."

"I'm fine," she replies, shying away from my touch. "It's just my cycle. I'm not pregnant."

I hear the shuffling of feet near us and move quickly, covering her body with mine. I damn Agni and the Spirit World. All I want to do is hold Katara in my arms and tell her everything is going to be okay, but my own fear steals my words.

"Prince Zuko, do you need assistance?" a guard shouts as he approaches us.

Climbing off Katara, I put my clothes to right and wipe my blood away. "Escort the Water Tribe peasant to my quarters. I'll be there shortly. For now, I want to make sure my orders are followed. I want to make sure that we trap her brother's spirit in the earth. We still need her cooperation."

--

TBC

A/N – Let me take a moment to hand some candy to Spleef, IZ, and MC for beta reading. Thanks a million!


	8. Chapter 8

**Warning! There is violence in this chapter. It was not an easy chapter to write so I do not think it will be an easy chapter to read.**

Chapter Eight –

I make my way to Katara's bedchamber with good, but bitter news. Sokka is safe. But it will take at least a month before I can get her to safety. Resistance forces are not ready to move. They are waiting on reinforcements. Once they are in place, my time will be at hand.

I move through the shadows, my thoughts in turmoil. How do I keep my lover safe for another month?

Pushing my way through the maze of suites, I nod to the guard at Katara's door who leers at me with disrespect. I move to reprimand him, but a scream echoes throughout the halls.

I shove the heavy door open and stop in my tracks.

Katara is naked, tied to the bed. My father is standing on one side of the bed while three Fire Sages stand on the other. Incense burns in the air and the Sages are muttering a low chant.

My lover hisses and spits as one of the holy men places his palm upon her stomach.

Her bottom lip is swollen and bloodied. Her left eye is puffy and purple. Her wrists and ankles are bloodied from her struggle.

"She should be taken quickly." The Sage moves his hand lower. "She will conceive tonight. Born of fire and water, the child will command all elements."

Exhaling, I hurl a fireball at the Sage, who shrieks in pain as his robes catch on fire. "Get away from her!"

A blast of hot air knocks me to the ground – a cowardly and feeble attempt by one of the other Fire Sages.

"Enough!" my father bellows as the fight was only sure to escalate.

Jumping up, I straighten my uniform and approach the bed. I present an air of indifferent calm, but I am terrified inside. As I draw closer, I avoid her gaze, knowing that my father has destroyed the last vestiges of anything Katara may have felt for me.

"All privileges have been revoked, Zuko," my father hisses, slamming his fist on the bedding next to Katara. "You shall be locked in this room with the Water Tribe peasant until the deed is done."

The Fire Sages back away at the display of my father's temper.

"I would sire the child myself, but I won't dare sully myself with such distasteful flesh." The Fire Lord walks toward the door and motions the Sages to follow him. He pauses at the door and turns. "I _trust_ you to perform your duties, no matter how distasteful you may find it. If she bleeds again, both your lives are forfeit."

I watch my father leave, listening to the locks being set behind the heavy doors.

--

I close my eyes as tears spill down my cheeks. Every muscle is sore and my spirit feels as though it has been shattered into a million pieces. I was slapped and mocked, stripped and ridiculed.

Whereas Ozai would have killed me without thought, the Fire Sages were adamant that I remain alive – a vessel for the next Avatar.

I wail. My despair overcomes me. There is no hope. The Avatar is gone. Aang is dead. My body trembles with grief and I pray for an end to my existence.

So caught up in my own feelings, I startle when a hand touches one of my wrists.

"Hush," Zuko's compassionate voice resonates around me, calling me from the pits of this hell.

"I'm… sorry," he whispers softly, loosening the knots so that I can free my wrists. "I'm so sorry I didn't protect you."

I want to hate him, but I can't. I know he is trying. "Sokka," I utter my brother's name in the hope that there is news.

Zuko works the knots from around one of my ankles. "He is safe."

I make no attempt to stem the flood of tears.

My lover hisses as he presses a cool washrag to my swollen lip. "Please, Katara. You must try," he pleads, his voice laden with guilt.

At first I don't realize what he is speaking about, but then I realize he wants me to heal myself. Flexing my fingers, I give a shuddering breath. The Fire Sages had suggested breaking my fingers to prevent me from washing Zuko's seed from my womb, but the Fire Lord hadn't followed their suggestion.

Summoning the water from the basin, I touch my lip first, and then my eye. It is then I realize how tired I am. Exhaustion seeps into my bones and I stop for a moment.

--

She looks beaten, her once vibrant youth stolen by our circumstances. "Please, Katara. You must heal."

"I'm so tired," she whispers and closes her eyes.

Touching her shoulder, I give her a little shake. "You must stay awake," I declare, mindful of what little medicine I have learned throughout the years. "Did you hit your head?"

She shakes her head, but makes no attempt to open her eyes.

"Please, Katara," I make one last request. "Please try for Sokka's sake."

Begrudgingly, she opens her eyes and stares at me. "Will you always fight so dirty?" she asks the question as though there is a future for us.

"Only for the woman I…love," the admission sticks in my throat.

A faint smile touches her lips and she calls the water from the bowl and sends it over her entire body. I am almost envious as the liquid dissolves into her body. Standing up, I remove my uniform and return to the bed, pulling her against me and entwining one of my legs between hers.

At first, she tenses, but quickly settles down. "I love you, too," she murmurs so softly that I almost do not hear it.

I stare into sad blue eyes, imagining that in a perfect world we are husband and wife. There is no threat hanging over us. In fact, the rest of the world does not exist.

"I'm afraid you find me quite dull," she chuckles, making me realize that I had spoken my fantasy out loud.

"Never," I whisper as I place a gentle kiss on her forehead.

She kisses me, the barest brush of her lips against mine. She reaches for my sex, but I gently hold her wrist to prevent her from touching me.

A slight scowl lines her brow.

"You've suffered enough today." My voice is husky and raw. "You needn't suffer my affections as well."

She shivers against me and closes her eyes. "Your affections are always welcome," she sighs sleepily and settles against me.

I welcome her slight weight and let her sleep for a little while. We have little time left as it is.

--

TBC

A/N – Thanks to Spleef and Moncapitan for the spit and polish and making sure I keep my pronouns straight.

Thanks to all who have reviewed. I try to answer all of them, but there are some that I am unable to review.


	9. Chapter 9

**Warning! Strong sexual content ahead! **

Chapter Nine –

The food tastes like rice paper as I chew it. The irony Katara and my situation is almost comical for now we are truly alone. The only servant to have any contact with either of us is the person who brings us our meals.

I am trapped, the bars on the window reminding me of my lover's life over the last few years. I want to run, but my father's reach consumes the land – that and we would be dead before we reached the palace courtyard.

Although I ache to take Katara, I don't. After the terrible trauma she suffered at the hands of the Sages and my father, I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

I force myself to eat breakfast in an effort to keep up my strength. I have some time left – time to plan Katara's escape. My father's newest conditions matter not to me. My own life holds no value any longer. I only want for Katara. I want her to be free.

As if she is able to hear my thoughts, she stirs in bed. Her robe gaps open, showing me a glimpse of one of her breasts. My body reacts as it always does. Setting my utensil down, I close my eyes and try to meditate. I need to think of a way to get Katara to safety.

--

The memory of last night flits across my mind as I wake. It chills me to think of the Sages' hands on me. Ozai's words chill me even more. Now Zuko's life is forfeit as well as my own.

Shivering, I open my eyes and realize why the bed is cold. In the sitting room past the archway, I see Zuko sitting at the table where meals are taken. His eyes are closed. He looks almost serene, but I can see the lines of tension around his mouth.

I get out of bed and enter the bathing room for my morning ablutions. Afterwards, I reenter the living quarters and approach my lover with intent. Zuko made no move to take me last night, and I feel the twist of cruel fate.

Standing before him, I untie my robe and clear my throat.

His amber eyes snap open and widen, an appreciative smirk gracing his lips. "Feeling better?" the prince asks, his gaze ravenously roaming over my naked flesh.

The urge to cover myself passes and I drop the robe to the floor in invitation.

Reaching for my arm, Zuko grasps my wrist and pulls me onto his lap. His lips close over mine, taking my breath away. Just as soon as the kiss starts, it ends. He peppers my cheek with love nips and groans.

"Katara," he sighs, his breath so heavy that it stirs my hair. "You don't have to do this."

"But I –"

He places a finger over my lips. "I'll figure a way out of this."

Kissing his lips, I mumble, "And sacrifice yourself in the process? No thank you."

"Katara –" he protests, but I press my finger over his lips. After all, turn-about is fair play.

"Promise me," I whisper against his scarred flesh. "Promise me that you will never leave me. Whatever you plan…whatever you do, you'll include me." I slip my hand inside his robe and run my palm across the flesh that guards his heart.

"I know you're plotting an escape." I kiss along his jaw, determined to seduce him, determined to take this one moment out of time and pretend that all is right with the world, determined to show Zuko how much I love him. "We go together or we don't go at all."

He buries his face in my neck and mumbles something, shifting me on his lap so that I feel the evidence of his desire.

Lifting me with one arm, he sweeps the low table clean with his other, sending dishes and food scattering across the cushions. I gasp as he sets me on the table and coaxes me to lie back.

Pulling my hips to the edge of the table, he rises on his knees and opens his robe with a flick of his wrist. The table is low. The cushions he kneels on are soft, granting him the height and leverage he needs to seal the bargain.

He claims me, merging our bodies as one. He suckles my neck, licking and biting the sensitive flesh there.

I cry out, welcoming the waves of pleasure as they wash over me. I twitch in his arms and he clamps my hips with his hands in a vice-like grip, growling as his release claims his sanity.

--

I am reluctant to release her. The warmth of the aftershocks of her body is a haven I wish never to leave, although I know I must. Noble Katara – always trying to protect everyone. She knows me too well. When I see my opportunity to see her to safety, I shall seize it, whether it means my own death or not. Either way, I know a separation is looming before us.

"Promise me," she pleads, looking up at me with her ice-blue eyes.

Not wanting to ruin the moment or the precious gift she has given me, I take the easy way out and lie. "I promise."

Her satisfied smirk widens into a smile, and she shifts beneath me and deepens our connection. "Seductress," I growl, bending over and capturing her lips.

Katara groans and I pull away, getting to my feet and offering her my hand. She is radiance personified – her skin glows in the subtle light of the room. She saunters alluringly before me.

She has no idea how she tempts me. I want her again. I watch the sway of her hips as she crawls onto the bed onto her stomach, opening her legs slightly in invitation – an invitation I am too weak to resist. Like a moth to a flame, I go to her.

I smooth my palms over her back and she sighs impatiently. "Just live in this moment, Zuko," she murmurs over her shoulder.

Like a condemned man, I join my body with hers. The union is deep and I close my eyes, picturing her by my side for all eternity.

--

The sun droops low on the horizon, heralding the end to another day. My body is tender – well used. My lover is exhausted, snoring softly on the bed.

As I stare out the window over the rooftops, I sigh in disappointment. I could easily freeze the bars of my gilded cage and break them, but it would do little good. The fall would kill us.

The door to our suite opens with a definitive thud and I turn to watch the servant bring the meal. She is not alone. The Fire Sages are escorting a healer. Their gazes linger on Zuko's slumbering form and then on me.

"What are you doing out of bed?" the Sage who tested my "readiness" the night before questions me. "You should be in bed with your legs up."

I raise one of my eyebrows in open defiance. The healer, an old woman, approaches me. Zuko stirs, but does not wake.

"It would help Prince Zuko's seed along its perilous journey," the healer states as two of the Sages move behind her.

"You will submit to an exam," one of the men demands.

I shake my head, backing away.

"Leave her alone," I hear Zuko warn, his voice holding a menace much like that of a drowsy tiger.

The third Fire Sage is poised to take the prince down should I resist. I hold my hand up in surrender. "It's fine, my lord," I say, closing my eyes as the healer undoes my robe and examines me. I start as I feel her touch.

"She is taken," the old woman announces with confidence. "But it is too soon to tell if the seed will take root."

Zuko hisses his frustration. "Now, get out!"

The Fire Sage nearest my lover grins. "You had better hope your seed takes, spoiled prince. Your father is running out of uses for you."

The healer pulls my robe together and ties my sash. The slide of scratchy paper startles me as the woman adjusts my robe.

"What is it?" one of the Sages asks, taking a step toward me. "What's wrong with her?"

"Her hands are cold," I mumble softly, clutching the note to my chest.

The old man accepts my excuse and backs away. They leave, slamming the doors behind them and setting the locks.

--

TBC

A/N – Tons of thanks to Moncapitan, Spleef, and Betathanu for the spit and polish. This story wouldn't be what it is without you all. You all rock!


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten –

Holding the letter that the healer slipped to Katara in my hand, my eyes scan the hastily scratched words. "Three weeks," I mumble under my breath.

Katara looks around nervously. "For what?"

"I don't know," I reply, perplexed by the cryptic message. I can only guess that the forces will be in place by then.

"What is going on?" she asks.

Jumping out of bed, I place the letter in a dish and set it afire. I watch as the paper turns to ash. "I don't know," I repeat.

"Is it from the…them?" Katara paces between the table and the bed, nervously wringing her hands. "Or is it some sick joke?"

I pause, considering her words carefully. I clasp her wrist gently and pull her toward the bathing room. I prime the pump as she watches me wordlessly. My heart is pounding in my chest. The fear I feel is very real as I consider that my father may have discovered my duplicity.

The water splashes into the deep tub and I watch the liquid rise.

"Zuko?" Katara's voice along with her hands question me as she caresses my cheek. "What's the matter?"

I pray to Agni that I am wrong -- that the healer is really with the resistance. "Nothing," I answer, not wanting to worry her. Three weeks is a long time away. Katara will bleed before then if she doesn't conceive a child. Even if she does conceive, I have no delusions.

My father will kill me if Katara is with child. He will kill both of us if she is not.

Her eyes narrow as she observes my growing agitation. I heat the water to a comfortable temperature and untie my robe. Dropping it to the floor, I crawl into the water and hold my hand out to her in invitation.

I am determined. I shall have Katara as many times as I can to ensure her survival. It isn't so much that she may die that upsets me, it's that I know what my father will do to her before he kills her. She will suffer cruelly, passed among common soldiers to do with as they please.

I would kill her myself, but I suspect I will be removed and executed as soon as she begins to bleed. I don't think I could do it anyway.

--

Untying my robe, I step into the tub and stand before him. With the speed of a striking snake, he moves forward and hugs me, pressing his face against my stomach. There is nothing sexual about the embrace, but I can feel his desperation.

Running my fingers through his hair, I try to offer him solace. It is then that I notice the moisture against my skin and the tears that fall into the bath water. I lift his head and see his golden eyes swimming with tears. Holding onto him, I kneel between his legs and welcome the buoyancy of the water. I ask him no questions as I can see the torment in his eyes.

"There's no escape." His voice is filled with regret.

"We'll find a way out." I try to place a reassuring kiss upon his lips, but he turns his head.

"You don't understand," he rasps. "He kept her here."

"Who?" I ask softly.

Zuko takes a shuddering breath and wipes the tears from his eyes. "My mother. Whenever she would displease him, she was sent here. It is the highest point in the palace, meant to isolate and destroy the spirit.

"Months would pass before he would release her," he continues, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me into his embrace. "He would keep her in this prison and I would hear her crying. I tried to comfort her, but my father would punish me. He seemed so strong…just like now."

I wiggle against him, raking my fingers along the scars of his back. "You're stronger than you realize."

"My Firebending… It isn't what it used to be. I try the advanced moves my uncle taught me, but none of them work. I can't… I can't defend you." Somber gold eyes peer into mine.

I give my lover a little shove, touched by his desire to protect me, but chastising him anyway. "I can take care of myself." For emphasis, I scoop water into my hand and bend it into ice.

He smiles, but it doesn't reach his eyes. He holds his hand out and I hand him the ice. I feel him stir beneath me and lift to receive him, always ready for him, always needing him.

--

The sun rises, heralding the arrival of another day. Katara is sleeping peacefully, exhausted from our activities throughout the night. She is the light in all this darkness, easily making me forget the bigger problem.

The heavy oak door creaks open and the lone servant girl enters the suite with our tray. Her eyes dart around the room nervously, as if trying to solve some complex problem. She glances at me and clears her throat, quickly looking at her hand, which lingers on the table.

With a curt bow, she leaves.

I approach the table, immediately noticing the carefully placed letter among the folded napkins. I reach for it, quickly unfolding the parchment and reading it.

_All elements work in tandem to usurp the seat of power. As the full moon takes its place in the sky, the final blow will rend the source of power asunder_.

I read the note again and again; hoping there is more, praying it is real. The full moon is in three weeks. If what I suspect is true, I must get Katara out of here. The only problem is that we will die if she bleeds before then.

--

TBC

A/N – Sorry this chapter is so short, but the transition needed to be made. Thanks to all who have reviewed. I try to answer them all, but am unable to answer some. If I've never answered your review, please don't take it personally. I simply don't know where to send the replies. Thanks!


	11. Chapter 11

Warning! Non-descriptive sexual content ahead! This story as a M rating for a reason.

Chapter Eleven –

It's as though time has stood still, an illusion that was created by man to mark the moments of existence. My lover's mood grows more somber with the each rising and setting of the sun. I am lethargic and I can't seem to overcome the effects of my melancholy.

We have received no more letters. Zuko plots daily. When he isn't plotting, he's with me. He calls me his addiction. I give him all that I am, trying to please him in the only ways I know of.

I submit to the daily exams. The healer's touch means nothing to me now. Zuko and I have no difficulties carrying out his father's orders. It's when the Sages begin to chant that I become nervous. I have yet to figure out whether they are blessing or cursing me.

I stare out the window and long for the blue of the sky – a sky that has long turned red due to the effects of Sozin's comet.

I ache all over. My intimate areas feel swollen and tender. I always feel this way before my monthly cycle begins. I want to scream. I want to cry. I've failed Zuko. I shall bleed any day now. I want to tell him, but I cannot find the words.

It matters not what happens to me. I know I shall suffer before I join my family and friends in the Spirit World. But I shudder to think what Zuko's father will do to him before he takes his life.

I shed no tears, for I have none left. Our fate is sealed. Our choices are limited.

"Are you all right?" His voice startles me from my reverie and I back away from the window.

"Yes," I lie, forcing a smile to my lips.

--

She looks sad. No matter how hard she tries, she cannot conceal the sadness in her eyes. "Are you certain?" I prompt, wrapping my arms around her and pulling her against me. I rest my head on her shoulder and my hands on her flat stomach.

Katara sighs and places her hands over mine. "I'm not pregnant."

I tense, grasping her shoulders and turning her around. Her eyes are the color of the long-lost sky. They are filled with tears as she meets my gaze.

"I'm so sorry," she whispers shakily, bowing her head in shame. "I have failed you."

"Have you started to bleed?" I ask against her ear carefully.

She nods and I hear a muffled, "Yes, two days ago," against my bare chest.

Katara straightens and tries to pull away. "But it stopped." Tears spill unchecked down her cheeks. "I don't feel well. I'm so tired, yet I can't sleep."

I scowl; wishing now I'd paid more attention to my instructors and my peers when I was younger. Most sciences classes focused on the various organs and how to harness the heat from them to enhance bending abilities. The more I think about it, there really hadn't been much instruction on the female organs – just the egotistical ramblings of my friends describing frantic encounters with concubines.

Pulling Katara's wrist, I lead her toward the bed. We settle quickly, her nestling her face against my chest. Even though I long to take her, I ease my breathing and will myself to calm down. Seducing her is not high on the list of my priorities, although it is my favorite to attend to.

I have spent the last weeks trying to figure a way out of this for both of us, but fate seems determined to side with my father. If I started a fire, we would burn. If we tried to leave by any means other than the double doors, we would fall to our deaths. There are no hidden passageways.

Her breathing evens out and she relaxes against me. These are the moments I cherish most -- holding her, closing my eyes, and pretending that we are free.

I hear the door of our prison open and I tense. It is time for Katara's exam. The healer approaches the bed, looking over her shoulder at the Sages who are standing behind her impatiently.

"She isn't sleeping well," I whisper, eying the woman warily.

The healer's expression is neutral and uncaring as she goes about examining my lover.

Katara stirs fitfully, but I shush her discomfort and offer her solace.

"Can't you come back later?" I ask, trying my best to remain calm so as not to disturb Katara.

"Well?" one of the Sages questions the woman.

"It is too early to tell yet," the healer replies, hastily rearranging Katara's robe.

"Has she bled?" the other Sage asks impatiently.

"She is not bleeding," the woman says, backing away from the bed. "Only time will tell."

"We should report this to Fire Lord Ozai," the third Sage speaks, openly planning my doom. "It appears she is with child."

"No!" the healer chastises the holy men. "It simply means that she is late. Either way, we should leave well enough alone. If Prince Zuko's seed does not grow inside her womb, what difference would a few days make?"

The Sages listen to the woman. Who better would know about the female body?

"The Fire Lord left specific instructions –" the Fire Sage nearest the healer states.

"If his seed has taken root within the Waterbender, it is best not to upset her," she admonishes him, trying to buy me some time. My purpose is served. My father means to kill me.

The Fire Sage backs away, seemingly unconvinced, but willing to take the healer's advice. "Very well, then. We shall discuss this tomorrow."

The woman glances over her shoulder as she follows the Sages out of the room.

When I hear the click of the lock behind the heavy doors, I gather Katara closer, slipping my hands beneath her robe. The touch is not meant to arouse. I am merely making certain that she is unharmed.

My hand brushes against something scratchy. Parchment! Another letter! Hope is fragile – its glowing embers slowly churning within me. I open it and scan the contents.

I Be on the eastern ledge by sunset tomorrow. /I

My brain works frantically, my heart hammering in my chest. Why the eastern ledge? It looks as though it can hardly support the weight of the cooing pigeons that nest there. It is a sheer descent of mud and rock – several stories of nothing but air. The view is nauseating when one looks straight down.

"What is it?" Katara's groggy voice pierces my thoughts. She has not seen the letter and I hand it to her. She stares at the cryptic message for several seconds, her eyes darting to the small window on the east side of our prison.

"Are they crazy?" she asks sluggishly. "There is nothing there. Nothing to grab hold of."

I hear the hope in her voice. It is laced with confusion and doubt. Staring at her, my gut clenches as I realize that tomorrow will bring an end to the sight I hold before me. Katara among rumpled bedclothes, looking delectable in more ways than one. I am unable to stop myself as I yield to temptation.

Her gaze rests on the evidence of my desire for her. Unknowingly tempting me, she licks her lips and nibbles on her bottom one.

"I need you," I beckon huskily.

Scooting to the edge of the bed, she holds her arms out in welcome.

I am drawn to her, unable to resist the lure of her warmth. Standing before her, I hiss as her agile hands undo the drawstring of my pants, pushing them from me. The cool air is such a contrast to the heat that is radiating off my body, but the fire of her encompassing me nearly brings me to my knees.

Tangling my hands in her hair, I guide her, gently controlling the depth of our union. I keep a leash on the frenzied lust that pounds at my soul. It is an all-consuming fire, harkening back to the brutality of my ancestors.

Katara groans. She has wanted to please me in this manner for some time now, but I haven't allowed it. Even now, I shudder at the thought of wasting my seed in this fruitless way. I long to explode within the confines of her shattering body.

I try to pull away before I am lost, but my lover clutches me to her. The soft sighs of encouragement are my undoing and the darkness takes hold of me. She is the only source of light, keeping me grounded to this earth as I discharge my seed into her welcoming orifice.

I am unable to think as I crumple to my knees. She cradles my head in her lap and strokes my scar.

"I love you," she whispers softly. The words hold meaning. I have not forced them from her like I have in the beginning.

Lifting my head, I look into her eyes. "I love you," I reply, the words alien to me. "No matter what happens tomorrow, I will always love you."

--

TBC

Please accept my sincerest apologies for the delay of this chapter. Thanks to all who have reviewed. This chapter was edited for mature content. Avatar: The Last Airbender belongs to its creators and Nickelodeon.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve –

The sun rises, highlighting the hues of orange and red in the air. Zuko was insatiable last night – almost inconsolable. He is asleep now. I almost envy him. Crossing my arms over my chest to ward off the chill in the air, I wince. My breasts are painfully tender. My emotions are heightened. I walk a fine line between tears and laughter.

I test the bars of the east window. The iron is weak and rusted. I can cut through them easily with my Waterbending. The problem with cutting through them and going through the window is where to go after we are out. The ledge is thin and looks as though it will crumble.

Grasping the bars tighter, I pull myself against them and stare at the ground. The jagged rocks look unforgiving, arranged in such a way as to discourage the very thought of escape. Whereas the view from the west window is warm and inviting, the view from the east window is a stark contrast. Even the roof decorations on the pagoda-like structure are turned inward, meant to taunt its occupants instead of chasing away evil spirits.

The weather has worn the ironwork and I cannot help but feel nervous over the instructions that were given to us yesterday. Unless they are able to fly, Zuko and I will fall to our deaths. Perhaps there is another way.

Shivering, I huddle against the wall and swallow the fear that rises in me. As if able to hear my thoughts, Zuko stirs and sits up in bed.

Holding his hand out, he summons me. "Come back to bed, Katara. It is early."

The huskiness in his voice is unmistakable. Dropping my robe to the floor, I climb into bed and straddle him. I am his blanket. He shivers beneath me and pulls the blankets around me, wrapping us both in a cocoon. I feel him press against me – his body's natural reaction to the closeness of mine.

His breathing evens out and I rest against him. I cannot sleep.

--

The sun is high in the sky and the meals have gone untouched. Katara is asleep. I have been reluctant to wake her. They will come for me soon. The Sages mean to kill me. My purpose has been served. I have written no letters. I dare not for discovery. I take solace in Katara's survival, confident that the resistance will either end her suffering quickly or rescue her.

The double doors swing open, admitting the quartet I have come to despise. The healer eyes me anxiously as the Sages take strategic places around the room.

Katara startles awake, sensing the danger in the air. Instead of submitting to the exam, she crawls away from the woman. "Don't touch me!" she rails angrily. "If you come any closer, I'll kill it!"

My lover's hands clutch her midsection as if poised to carry out her threat. The Sages' expressions are cold masks of fury as they approach Katara.

The Waterbender calls the water from the nearby pitcher, quickly fashioning an ice-like dagger. At first she holds it up and away from her, trying to warn everybody away. But as they continue advancing, she realizes the fruitless action. She looks insane. The look in her eyes is vacant and full of fear.

They crowd her, heedlessly uncaring. She turns the dagger on herself and they freeze in their tracks. I can see their fear – their fear of the threat. They have not anticipated Katara's resolve. Their plan is flawed.

With each breath, I take a step closer, my hands out in front of me in a conciliatory manner. I cannot let Katara do it. I know not what the resistance is planning, but I know they are close by, plotting something – her possible rescue. I will not allow her to take her own life.

Brushing against one of the Sages, I crawl onto the bed. "Katara, please," I say, trying to calm her down.

Tears streak down her face as she presses it against the skin of her stomach. My hand covers hers and I seize the opportunity to melt the ice dagger quickly, enraging my lover with my supposed betrayal. Hissing and scratching, she curses me.

I pin her down and subdue her, glaring at the Sage nearest to us. "Tell my father that it would seem I have a new purpose – ensuring the Water Witch does not harm that which grows inside her. Now leave!"

He backs away, summoning the healer and others to follow him. I ignore the look of contempt on the man's face and smirk. As the locks are put back into place, I loosen my hold on Katara. I can feel her pulse racing beneath my hands.

"I couldn't let them take you," she whispers shakily. "We're too close to give up now."

I capture her lips tenderly and pull away quickly.

She sits up, not bothering to cover herself as her robe gapes open. "Do you really think I'm pregnant?"

Kneeling before her, I peel her robe away from her skin and place my hand over her flat stomach. I place a gentle kiss on the flesh, not know what to pray for. In a way, I hope she is pregnant. On the other hand, I hope she isn't. I admire her dusky areolas and kiss each one. Her gasp is one of discomfort.

"I don't know," I reply softly, knowing deep down in my gut that she has conceived my child. "It is too soon to tell."

--

I watch from the west window as the sun dips beyond the horizon with little fanfare. I motion to Katara to make her move. With a precision I envy, she sends a razor thin sheet of ice through the already rusting bars. As she pries the iron from its place several explosions light the twilight sky.

The flooring shifts beneath us and crumbs of the ceiling fall onto our heads. "Get out onto the ledge!" I command, moving toward her.

Katara holds her hand out, moving further into the room. The noises surrounding us are almost deafening. She is shouting something at me, motioning for me to join her. I run toward her, dodging plaster chunks of our prison at it collapses around us. Past Katara and outside the window, I see our salvation.

An outcropping of rock has ascended to the highest level. It sways precariously, as though it will crumble under its own weight. Katara falls to her knees, unable to keep her balance. Scooping her into my arms, I stumble toward the window and pray to Agni that we are able to make it.

The window is small. Only one of us can fit through at a time. I push Katara through it and onto the earthen platform. But she holds onto me, her nails digging painfully into my arm. The inertia drags me forward, causing the remnants of the iron bars to pierce the skin of my chest, hip, and leg.

The platform starts to descend, drawing Katara and me down and away from the crumbling building. I can feel the blood oozing from my chest, hip, and leg as I watch the sections of the palace shudder violently and cave in upon itself. Smoke obscures my vision as I witness pillars of fire descend from the sky.

My father's wrath is swift and quick. I can feel his anger. It burns inside me. I shield Katara as best as I can, hoping my body will be enough as I prepare for the end. I close my eyes, but the sounds of destruction and the smell of acidic smoke fade as I succumb to darkness.

--

"I won't leave him!" Katara's voice shrieks nearby as I feel the cool healing water move through my body. "He needs me!"

"You must!" a stern voice replies. "His father knows he lives. Ozai seeks to destroy Zuko. You are too valuable to risk. The catacombs are yielding to the fire attacks above ground!"

It is difficult to open my eyes, but I force them open. In the ill-illuminated shadows of the underground caves, I see the Waterbender who healed me the first time, working over me. A look of concentration consumes her expression as she focuses all her energy into my chest, hip, and leg.

"Mahari is right, Katara." Toph sounds frustrated and tired. "We're losing ground. The fire above us is too intense."

"So you're just going to leave him behind? Is that it?" my lover sobs, pleading for my life.

"Katara," I mumble softly.

"The Waterbenders can't hold the currents forever," Jeong Jeong warns nearby.

"Zuko," cries Katara, kneeling next to me. She strokes my cheek and I lean into her touch.

"Listen to them," I rasp, wincing in pain. I am sure I have broken ribs. "Leave me."

"No," she argues. "We made a promise. We're sticking together."

My eyes fall to Toph. She is covered in dirt -- her face caked in mud. "Take her away," I state. "Protect her. Don't ever leave her."

The Earthbender who wanted me dead weeks ago nods and grabs Katara's wrist.

"No!" Katara hisses and pulls away, trying to push the healer out of the way and gather me into her arms.

Feeling the rise of fever stir within me, I shun her. "Go now!" I bellow.

She takes a step back, her eyes wide with fear.

Swallowing the bile that has risen in my throat, I shudder against the pain of my recent wounds. "Sozin's comet has driven my father mad. It has consumed him and his bloodline. I can feel it coursing through me, Katara. It calls to me…tries to lure me into the open to accept my fate."

"What do you mean?" she asks, holding her stomach protectively.

"This will only end when he dies, Katara," I reply softly.

"We'll go away! Far away! Where he can't reach us!" She is openly weeping and clutching her stomach.

It is painful to look at her desperation, but I must be strong. "I am like a beacon, Katara. He can track me anywhere I go. He is relentless. He won't rest until I am dead. He won't rest until you are found. I won't pretend to understand the prophecy surrounding our child." I feel moisture on my cheeks. "But I know that Ozai wants it. And that cannot be a good thing."

The other Waterbender assists me as I sit up with great effort. "You must go away, Katara. You must leave me. If you stay, all hope will be lost."

Falling to her knees, Katara looks at me with wounded eyes. "You knew all along, didn't you?"

Her words are lost as the earth shudders around us. It feels as though I am on fire as my father reaches out for me. He is close by, seeking that which will make him a god…make him immortal.

"I love you!" Katara declares, clutching my bloodless thigh. I can see the resolution in her eyes and know that I must act quickly.

With a growl, I shove her hand away and clumsily distance myself from her. "I don't…love you." The words are bitter in my mouth. "I promised Aang I would take care of you should anything happen. I've done my best! You should go."

My harsh words hit their mark and she shrinks back. "So that's all I was to you…an obligation."

"Yes," I affirm. "An obligation I've fulfilled." I look her directly in the eyes, reinforcing the "truth" of my words.

"I don't believe you." She straightens and moves next to Toph.

Watching the interplay of hurt and betrayal arc across her face, I long to take the words back. But I drive the wedge deeper. "Believe what you want, Katara."

The ground above our heads moans with the weight of its burden. Toph gasps as if in pain. "Come on, Katara. Sokka's safe. I'll take you to him."

I see the flash of hope in her eyes as she listens to the Earthbender. She backs away, her azure eyes never leaving my face. I look away as though I am indifferent, sealing our fate.

When I look up, she is gone.

--

End Act I

A/N – No, this isn't the end of the story. It's the end of the beginning. When I started to write this, I had originally intended for it to be much shorter than it already is. Thanks to my wonderful sounding board, Moncapitan, I realized the potential of this story and the delicacy that it would need in order for me to tell it.

I have promised a happy ending and I shall deliver. It will take some time to arrive at that destination. I am merely taking a slight break (probably a week of resting my wrists and brain) so that I can plot out what is to come.

On a personal note, I'd like to thank all of the people I've spoken with over the time of writing this. The support has been awesome. Thanks to all the faithful reviewers. All reviews are cherished and welcome.

Right now, I'm preparing for Tropical Storm Ernesto. We are thankfully not in his path, but are expected to get lots of nasty wind and rain. With wind and rain comes power outages and the battery on my laptop only lasts so long…


	13. Act II Chapter One

Act II – Bitter Cause

Chapter One –

The ability to adapt has always amazed me. I have traveled through the myriad of catacombs and underground rivers, surfacing sparingly as I am being hunted. Ozai searches for me. As surely as Zuko can feel his father's presence, so can I. His trackers are relentless. As soon as I settle down, I must move on. The wariness of my nomadic life is complicated by my condition. I am with child…. _his_ child… a child that will be born into a changed world in just a few weeks. I try not to think of the circumstances – the lies and broken promises that created the life within me.

Zuko played his part admirably, convincing me that he loved me and getting me to go along with his demands. There are nights I wake, able to feel his touch upon me. As slumber gives way to reality, I realize my dream and shame. His profession of love was a mere ruse, a lie to garner my cooperation. To think that I was merely his obligation, another footnote in his quest for his honor… My pain is palpable. It churns inside me daily. I close my eyes and try to keep the tears at bay. I am unsuccessful and the moisture leaks from the corners.

"Don't c-cry, Katara," my brother stammers over the wind, crawling across the sand sailer and embracing me.

I lean against Sokka, his lithe frame warming me against the night air. He shields me from the biting sting of the sand as we make our way across the desert.

I was reunited with my brother months ago. Throughout our travels, I have worked diligently healing him and burying my grief over Zuko. As much as I want to, I cannot stop loving him. I console myself with the gift my lover has given me. I take comfort in my brother and Toph.

I have followed Toph through the tunnels and underground rivers, relieved to see her but resentful that I am now her "responsibility." Throughout the months, she has never left my side, keeping her promise to my former lover.

My brother rocks me into his lap, a habit he still clings to from his time of torture. It is an awkward position, for I am larger and heavier now. "I have you, Katara," he murmurs against my ear and I relax against his strength.

Even though I've done my best to heal Sokka, he is still not well. The scars run deep and even the most advanced Waterbending cannot heal old wounds. Time has sealed his fate. Yes, he is better. Taken from the wretched conditions, his health has improved. Zuko has saved my brother. For that, I shall always be grateful.

Clean and healthy, Sokka has gained weight. He walks with a heavy limp, opting to crawl on the floor more often than not. His right hand is rigid and he clutches it close to his chest. The right side of his face has fallen into a permanent half-frown. Thankfully, his personality and sense of humor have not been affected too much. For the most part, he is still the over-protective ogre that he has always been. His wit is not as sharp, but sharp enough to make me laugh.

"We are almost home, Aang," he comforts me as best he can, putting a hand over my stomach.

I cannot help but wince as he refers to the baby as our dead friend. The rumors that circulate around his or her birth are filled with prophecy and doom. I do not want this for my child. Sokka thinks Aang is inside me, waiting to be reborn.

The baby moves, shifting within my womb as if trying to get comfortable. Soon I will hold him or her in my arms. The baby's delivery is close at hand. I close my eyes and envision the icy tundra of my youth. I long to return there, but the trackers are merciless. Surely, they lie in wait for me there, waiting to take me back to the Fire Nation.

"Home!" Sokka shouts with glee, throwing one of his fists in the air as if daring anyone to argue with him.

Toph stares into the desert, unable to see anything and ignoring my brother's outburst.

"Isn't that right, Toph?" Sokka yells over the roar of the wind.

"Yeah, sure," the Earthbender retorts with a wave of her hand. "Whatever."

Home for how long? A day? A week? A month? Ozai will find me. His blood runs within the veins of my child. I have come above ground for one reason only – to have the baby. I refuse to give birth in the cold, dank caverns of the underworld. We travel into the desert to carry out this task. Once accomplished, we will retreat to the protection of the earth.

"Are you all right?" Toph questions me, stumbling along the bumpy platform as it continues its forward motion. She may not be able to "see" very well in the desert, but she can sense my discomfort.

"Yes," I reply, breathing through the minor discomfort of being jostled about.

She sits next to me, sullen and quiet. "We should have stayed below, Katara," she repeats her protest.

I sigh, knowing that she is right. But I want the child to be born in the fresh air, under the sun, or beneath the moon. Whichever fate holds in store for him or her. Glancing at the other sand sailer, I watch as our entourage adjusts to the bumpy ride.

We have two bodyguards and a midwife – Ola, the Zhang leader we had crossed the Great Divide with so long ago, the Boulder, one of Toph's old nemeses from her days as the Blind Bandit, and a young non-bending healer named Song. Ola looks at home on the sand sailer, relishing the sand that stings her skin. The Boulder hangs his head near the edge of the vehicle in the event that he must vomit again. Song sits next to him, offering what little comfort she can.

They are all volunteers – people who believe that I carry the future of our race within my womb. Their belief frightens me. I want only to protect my child against the savageries of this world.

--

I focus on the flame and try to meditate, but the water drips from the cave ceiling, taunting me over who I have lost -- Katara. She haunts my dreams and my nightmares. Does she still carry my child? Is she safe? Is she content?

"Focus," Jeong Jeong growls next to me, shifting to a spot where the water does not fall.

We live underground, in the catacombs beneath the oceans. My father's wrath cannot reach me here. More appropriately, he cannot harm the ground above me. The water protects us.

"How can you focus?" I hiss through clenched teeth. "The water is everywhere as if it will claim the earth and our lives at any moment!"

"It is a possibility," Jeong Jeong states, ready to accept any fate that awaits him. "I trust the Earthbenders to maintain the integrity of our shelter."

"And what of air?" I ask sharply.

"We have plenty," the Firebending Master retorts with a smirk. "With the constant shifting of the earth, air floods the tunnels."

I understand the dynamics of our environment, but I am still uneasy, even after the months I have spent beneath the ground. I miss the sun. I have not seen it in several days. It is always an effort for me to seek the sun. I always go alone in the event I cannot control my thoughts or emotions.

I am like a rodent, surfacing from a burrow, hoping not to be snatched by a predator.

That is what I am preparing to do now. I must meditate… empty my mind and soul so that my father cannot find me. Every time the Earthbenders open a conduit for me to ascend to the surface, the entire colony is in danger. I have worked hard to isolate myself, but we all need the Earthbenders to survive within their element.

"You are looking pale," Jeong Jeong reminds me softly. "You must attend to your own health before you can confront your father and realize your destiny."

"And just what is my destiny?" I snap at the man who has essentially taken the place of my beloved uncle as Firebending Master. "To die at his feet like Avatar Aang did? To slip farther into insanity as the comet consumes me?"

The flames in front of me flicker with a controlled burst of anger from the man near me. "If you die at Ozai's feet, it will be nobody's fault but your own."

"What does Mahari have to say on the matter?" I ask, not rising to the challenge in his tone. "Has she foreseen my death? Does she foresee the birth of my child? Does she see Katara'a future?"

"She is not that kind of seer." The master closes his eyes and exhales sharply.

"Then how can she tell me that I will restore the balance?" I question him.

Jeong Jeong takes a long cleansing breath. His eyes are closed and he is slipping into a state I envy. "If she has seen it, it will happen," he answers slowly, before he slides into his state of meditation.

Realizing that the conversation is over and I still have no real answers to my questions, I concentrate on the flames and struggle to obtain the state that offers me the blissful oblivion.

--

TBC

A/N – I'd like to thank all of you for the kind wishes and prayers regarding TS Ernesto. They worked! My neck of the woods was unaffected. It was all around us, but we got very little rain and even less wind as it tracked through central Florida.


	14. Act II Chapter Two

Act II

Chapter Two

--

Staring at the reddish-orange hue of the horizon as the sun rises, I sigh softly.It is the only time of the day that the sky looks as it should. The rest of the day, the sky looks menacing, as if the clouds will open and rain blood onto the land. Sand swirls at my feet as the breeze comes in off the desert.

I have been here for three days, restless and tired. Nothing anyone says can allay my worries. The baby will be here soon. I anticipate its arrival sooner than most. My back aches continuously now.

Sokka stirs and startles awake, looking around the room wildly. His nightmares have gotten worse.

Walking to the bed, I touch his shoulder softly and calm him. "It's okay, Sokka. We're home, now."

Even in the shadows I can see the tears streaking down his face and hear his raspy breathing. "I dream…" he says, taking a sobbing breath. "Bad things."

Instead of asking him what kind of bad things, I wrap my arms around him and offer him what little solace I can, for my dreams are riddledwith nightmares too. I dream of Zuko. He calls to me, begs me to return him. As I draw closer, I do not find the welcome arms of my lover, but those of his father, who waits to steal my child from me. It is a nightmare that repeats in my mind until I question my own sanity.

Sokka rubs my stomach for comfort and sings off key to the large mound. "Aang," he murmurs softly.

I pull away, my emotions on the cusp of collapse. "Sokka…" my voice is husky with tears. "Aang is dead. My baby isn't Aang."

My brother looks at me solemnly. "Uncle Iroh," he whispers Zuko's uncle's name and pats my stomach.

I chuckle, wondering if my brother will name the baby after Appa or Momo next. Truth be told, I have considered the name of Zuko's uncle for the child if it's a boy. I want to honor my lover's lineage, to honor the man who taught him to become more than the hideous soul his father fostered. If it is a girl, I will name her Keya after my mother.

As if sensing my thoughts, the baby kicks.

Pushing my brother over, I crawl into bed and try to go back to sleep. A sharp pain lances through my midsection and I feel a warm gush of fluid between my legs. Startled, I sit up in bed. "Sokka, go wake Song. It's time!"

--

"Focus," a warning growl comes from the shadows as the flame of the candle flickers. "Feel the energy flow through you. Embrace it. It's different than that of the sun, warmer and more welcoming, but difficult to control."

Exhaling sharply, I reach within myself and search for the "heat of the earth," the inner core that lives and pulses beneath our feet.

I hear Jeong Jeong shift near me, calling upon his abilities to put the flame out. This is basic Firebending, but necessary. Instead of harnessing the sun, he harnesses the earth. It is a strange discipline, one I am unaccustomed to and find great difficulty grasping. How does one harness the power of the earth to create fire?

As children, we are taught that we are descendants of the sun, and that even though it is far away, its heat lives within us. Now that the remnants of the comet block the sun, most Firebenders are powerless.

My father was ruthless, not only destroying the other nations with the fire rain, but establishing his reign over all his dominion.

There is a sect of Firebenders – a rather small number – who have learned to overcome this disability and tap into the heated core of the earth. Jeong Jeong is one of them, and I am practicing to become another.

As I slip into the meditative trance, I feel my body temperature begin to rise. This is the exercise – to touch the core and regulate my body temperature. As my mind slithers into the soil, an element alien to me, it yields to me. I am not bending it. It is welcoming me, pleading with me to restore the balance between all elements. The earth shelters us, but it cannot do so forever.

A burning pain racks my body and I lose my tenuous hold. It feels as though I am a great distance. My eyes snap open and the flame that I had been focusing on is out. I get the impression that a great amount of time has passed. I can never tell without the rising and setting of the sun. It feels as though I haven't eaten for days and my stomach growls.

"Welcome back," a soft voice greets me from the shadows of the cave. "How do you feel?"

Mahari steps into the light and eyes me with concern.

Shrugging my shoulders, I try to stand, but my legs are weak and do not cooperate. I fall to the ground in a confused heap.

"Don't worry," the seer soothes me. "It took Jeong Jeong a week to get back to his old self when he tapped into the core. Tell me, what did you see?"

I am frustrated by my own feebleness and attempt to stand again. "I saw nothing," I hiss with effort. "I felt pain. In fact, I still feel the pain."

Offering me a hand, Mahari frowns. "That is odd."

Slapping her hand away, I pin her with a warning glare and manage to pull myself up to sit against the nearest wall. "Instead of getting all mysterious, why don't you just tell me what the hell is going on!"

She calmly tucks her hand into her sleeve and sits in front of me. "The pain… Describe it to me."

I can see that the seer isn't going to leave me alone until she gets what she came for, so I reluctantly close my eyes and try to recall my experience. The pain lances through my gut and lower extremities. With the pain come strange and vivid images.

_The air is dry and I lick my lips. A woman with dark hair and eyes holds my hand._

"_Listen to Song," the woman says worriedly._

"I am exhausted," I murmur softly, the echo of my words bouncing off the cave walls. "As though I have expended a great amount of energy."

_A baby cries in distance and people are gathered around it, trying to comfort it_.

"There is a baby. It is crying." I shift uncomfortably and feel the need to go to it.

"_You aren't done, Katara," the healer cautions._

"Katara!" I call out, my heart and soul aching as realization dawns on me.

"_Push!"_

"_I can't!" _

"_You must!" the healer commands._

"The second child… Was it born?" Mahari questions, a voice seemingly floating in a void as I try to move through the pain and focus on Katara.

_I can see the vivid blue of Katara's eyes. She is exhausted and worn. _

"_Please," she pleads. "Take it. Save the baby." _

_The healer works quickly, gathering supplies and mixing them in a bowl. She rubs the mixture onto a cloth and holds it to my lover's mouth and nose. "Breathe deeply," she instructs solemnly._

_Tears mar the perfection of Katara's beauty as she takes a shuddering breath and closes her eyes._

"You knew!" I rasp in pain as the images fade and I open my eyes. "You knew!"

Mahari's black eyes are filled with remorseful worry. "Yes," she hisses. "I knew she carried two babes within her womb."

"Why?" I ask her, the agony of what I have just seen fresh on my mind. I want to shake the woman before me, but I resist the inclination. It isn't her fault. It is mine. If I had only been strong enough to stand against my father…

The seer grasps my sleeve. "Did you see whether the second child was born?"

Pushing away from her, I struggle to stand, but fall onto my knees. She repulses me. She is only concerned about the second child. She has the same gleam in her eyes that my father gets when he hungers for power.

"Is she alive? Is Katara alive?" The words stick in my throat.

"Is the second child born?" she counters my question with the same question as before.

I slam my fist into the ground, feeling helpless and scared. "I don't know. I didn't see it!"

Mahari paces the length of the cave like a caged animal. "It must live. It must! No matter what the sacrifice!"

I close my eyes as the tears threaten to spill. Just like my father, the woman before me has an agenda. What it is, I do not know? "Is Katara alive?" My voice is filled with anguish as I realize the depth of the fateful plot that has ensnared Katara and me. Even now we are not truly safe.

Mahari waves her hand in frustration. "I have not seen her death, but it doesn't mean she isn't dead. Most women do not survive the birth of multiple children."

I long to strangle the woman before me, but the wariness has taken its toll on my strength. Even in the ill-illuminated cave, her dark eyes shine.

"There is a way!" she exclaims, madness clear in her inflection. "Once you're rested, you can connect with the core again. That is what allowed you to see such a distance."

Without Katara, my own soul holds no value. "I will not seek the core again." I prepare myself for her wrath, but she merely stares at me in disbelief. I do not know what this woman wants. Nor do I care. Katara is most likely dead; as is the second child this woman is so obsessed about.

"If you want knowledge of the second child, do it yourself." I wait for her to strike at me, releasing me from the misery of this life.

Instead, she does something totally unexpected. Kneeling next to me, she touches my scarred flesh and presses her lips against it. "Forgive me," she whispers next to my ear. "My gift is sometimes a curse. As I ponder my visions and their meanings, I often lose sight of the people they are about." She rests her head on my shoulder and shivers in the damp cold of the cavern.

"The Fire Sages were right," she continues. "The Avatar has returned – born of fire and water. I do not know how this is so, but the spirit of the earth has been sent forth among us again."

Pulling away from me, Mahari leans against the wall of earth. "I am sorry. I did not mean to belittle Katara's sacrifice for the greater good."

"Stop it!" I demand, crawling away from her. "Stop talking like she is dead!"

"Prince Zuko –"

I keep crawling away from the seer. "Leave me!" I rail. I know what she is trying to say, but I do not wish to hear the words. Katara is alive. I know she is. I hope she is. She is strong. She would never leave our children.

--

TBC

A/N – Many thanks to Spleef for beta-reading. I love you, man!


	15. Act Ii Chapter Three

Act II

Chapter Three

--

I have lost track of time. I think it has been three months since the birth of the twins, but I am not sure. I am lucky to be alive. So are the children, for they are early. Song credits their lives to my will and natural healing abilities as a Waterbender. I must admit that I do not remember much about the birth of my children. I don't think I want to remember. I have been blessed with the best of both worlds, for I have a son and a daughter.

My worries prickle the back of my eyelids and I blink rapidly, trying to prevent the flow of tears I know are sure to come. Song says it is natural. All women experience moodiness after childbirth, especially a difficult one.

I am afraid for my children. We are sitting turtle-ducks because we cannot travel in our current condition. My daughter is especially ill, needing the sunlight, even the muted rays through Sozin's comet, to maintain her health. My nightmares have changed. Ozai finds me, stealing one of the babies and killing the other. I know not whether he can sense their presence in the world. I pray to my ancestors to protect us.

One of the babies whimpers next to my bed and I move as quickly as I can to attend to my son's needs before he wakes his sister. I don't need to look into the basket to see who is fussing. Iroh is like his great-uncle. He is constantly preoccupied with his next meal.

I peer into the basket and find my son wide awake and sucking on his fist. His golden eyes, so much like his father's, follow my every move. I gather him in my arms and he grunts in anticipation. Even in happiness, I am sad and I cannot control the tears as they slide down my cheeks.

As I sit on the bed, I offer my breast to him. He latches on quickly and suckles greedily.

Just like his great-uncle, Iroh is first-born. I only hope he leads a luckier life than his namesake.

It was a long and exhausting labor. Song often teases him and calls him a cow-pig due to his hearty appetite and size. He is bigger than his sister and craves more attention than she does. I think he looks like his father, but Sokka says he looks like him. I hate to destroy my brother's illusions, but my son looks nothing like him…Thank goodness!

Toph, in her usual blunt manner, says Iroh looks like the Boulder. But she is quick to remind me that she is blind.

I sigh contentedly as Iroh continues feeding. I play with the tuft of hair on the top of his head and think it's strange that Kaya, who is smaller than Iroh, has a full head of hair while her brother has very little. Mimicking me, my son sighs and his eyes drift shut. Song would chastise me if she saw me feeding him again. She says he uses me as a pacifier. I don't mind. I am just happy that I am alive to offer my son comfort.

I only hope I am ready to defend my children when the time comes.

--

Jeong Jeong attacks swiftly, throwing flames toward me that I easily break with my arms.

"Again!" he barks, assuming his original stance as he prepares to drill.

Exhaling impatiently, I prepare to block his advance. My mind drifts; taking the familiar path of self-doubt and grief that has consumed me for the past three months. I am not surprised or angry when the Firebending master breaks my root and sends my flying onto my ass.

"You must concentrate, Prince Zuko!" he growls irritably, circling me as I stand up and brush the mud from my clothes.

Try as I might, I cannot concentrate. If my soul traveled to the Spirit World tomorrow, I would rejoice. But I know I cannot do that. I cannot leave this world until I have my revenge.

Katara is dead. At least, I think she is. I have made no additional attempts to seek the core. Without it, my Firebending is weak.

I have a child somewhere in this world, possibly another. My heart aches whenever I contemplate my destiny. I long to seek the knowledge Mahari craves, but I am through being an insignificant piece on another's Pai Sho board.

Seeing my lack of enthusiasm for the duel, Jeong Jeong throws his hands in the air and picks up his towel. "You will never defeat your father," he states sharply, his disappointment clearly visible. "You lack the will necessary to confront Ozai."

"I will have my revenge," I reply softly.

Jeong Jeong scoffs, throwing his towel to the ground. "Revenge? Is that all there is to live for?" He is still spoiling for a duel. "Do you not fight for your children or their mother?"

My blood boils and my anger consumes me. I jump up and rush him, falling flat on my face as he sidesteps me. "Damn you!" I hiss. "She's dead! How dare you speak of her! The resistance could have saved her at any time, yet Mahari waited for the prophecy to be fulfilled. She sacrificed Katara for what? Don't say the greater good! I don't believe in the return of the Avatar. He's dead! I watched him die!"

The Firebender strokes his beard, his scowl deepening. "Yes, Avatar Aang is dead, but not all hope is lost. The Avatar has been reborn," he affirms loudly, his voice echoing through the cavern.

"Have you ever heard the legend of the first Avatar?" Jeong Jeong folds his legs and sits on the ground. "Legend says that the air molded him from rock, that opposite elements put aside their differences and worked in harmony to create hope for mankind. The spirit of the planet embraced the air, welcoming it…using it to bring forth life.

"A new cycle has begun," the Firebending master continues. "Fire and water have blended together to create hope again – the spirit of one of your 'living' children."

I bridle at the reference of my children.

"Are you so consumed by guilt that you cannot see what you fight for any more?"

Jeong Jeong asks, scoring another mark against my wounded pride.

I am speechless. Words elude me. I have no idea how to answer the question because I have lost my way. What am I fighting for? I have fought to survive for so long, I do not remember. I hunted the Avatar to restore my honor. I fought to regain my throne. Now I fight for revenge?

"Instead of living for revenge, why don't you live for your children and their mother?" Jeong Jeong's right eye twitches as he asks the question and I suddenly realize how similar we are. Next to his silvery-gray eyes, he has two scars that look as though he was mauled by an animal.

"They are dead," I murmur slowly, enunciating each syllable slowly.

The Firebending Master bows his head in defeat. "You should just go to your father now and pray for a quick death. You grieve over the living and it hinders your abilities."

It takes a moment for his words to register, but then I realize that he has sought the core to get the information Mahari desires. My eyes widen with wonder as I realize they are alive. "Have you seen them? Are they well? Is Katara in pain? Are they --" The words are laced with anguish and stick in my throat.

Jeong Jeong closes his eyes and sighs. "Yes. But they are in great danger. Ozai's hunters have scented blood. They have realized that Katara does not live by water as your father originally thought. They have broadened their search to all lands. It is only a matter of time before they are found."

"Where are they? Why aren't they in the caves where they can be protected?" I ask, my apprehension growing.

"I don't know," he replies.

"Can you help me seek the core?" I am desperate and will do anything at this point. I need to see for myself. An ever-present sense of dread tightens its grip upon me. "I need to see her. I need to warn her."

Jeong Jeong stares at me for a moment before replying. "It will be difficult," he murmurs. "It will take time."

"I've already done it once," I remind him desperately.

"Everything is connected, Prince Zuko," Jeong Jeong instructs. "As your mind travels through the layers of the earth, you must not become mired in other peoples' struggles. You must focus on Katara. Find her and the children. If you go in search of one thing, you may get lost."

--

TBC


	16. Act II Chapter Four

Act II

Chapter Four

--

An exhaustive sleep holds no dreams. That is the kind of sleep I have been getting lately. Keeping up with two babies will do that to any mother.

Iroh and Kaya grow daily. Their progress is astounding. Iroh is walking now and I am hopeful that Kaya will follow his example. She is still small, but she is putting on weight daily. She wheezes with the least bit of effort and tires easily, but the minerals from the melted glacier help her overcome this problem. It is as though my ancestors have guided us here. Without the bubbling crater outside, Kaya would not survive. We are tied to this place because of this. With these thoughts, I drift off into what I hope is a dreamless sleep.

Darkness swirls around me, carrying me deep into shadows. As I travel into the darkness, my happiness and worries over my children gives way to heartache. Zuko. The mere thought of my lover sends a tremor through my body.

"Katara," my name echoes around me.

Colors burst from the inky depths surrounding me. I brace myself for a nightmare, but startle as I come across a passionate scene between Zuko and my doppelganger. There are no bars on the windows, no guards, and no spies. We are free and the world has not fallen apart around us.

My dream self sighs with pleasure and grasps the sheets as Zuko blankets her body with his and rocks against hers. He peppers her face with kisses. My body grows warm as I watch the display.

A misty fog consumes the scene and it changes. This time I watch a brutal coupling. She grasps the ornate headboard as Zuko takes her from behind. Flesh slaps together and the partners cry out together as they reach nirvana. The scenes change one right after another, seemingly mocking me and reminding me of the love I have lost.

I have forgiven his bitter words, but not his betrayal. He promised never to leave me. Technically, he didn't. I left him. His words and implacable resolve drove me away. I am angry with myself for listening to him…for letting him manipulate me in such a manner. But her was right. His father would have used the connection to find the children and me. Tears of grief consume my soul and I weep for what may have been.

"Katara." My whispered name sounds so far away.

--

My spirit moves through the earth. I hear the whispers of mankind and try to filter the noise to find Katara and the children. The dampness of the cave has faded away. I ignore my aching muscles – the price I pay for my daily drills with Jeong Jeong. I am stronger now, using the strength of the planet to amplify my natural abilities. It is a strange sensation, embracing the fire below instead of calling upon the sun.

I try to find the desert oasis in the hopes that they are still there. Months have passed since I began actively embracing the core. Jeong Jeong was right. It takes time to harness the power of the earth.

I chuckle in remembrance. My uncle was right. The elements are connected. I pray that I am not too late. I have driven away the fear for Katara and the twins to focus on the task at hand. Jeong Jeong's warning has driven me to the point of exhaustion.

My spirit surfaces in fire, whether it is meant for light, warmth, or decoration I do not know. I have become part of it. I hear voices and see familiar walls. My heart sinks as I realize where I am.

I am in my father's war council.

"Search again!" a menacing voice booms loudly as the fire rises in direct proportion of my father's temper.

"But sir, we cannot cross the desert. The storms –" an underling simpers nearby.

"I don't want excuses," Ozai replies harshly. "I want the child!"

"The desert is impossible to cross! Every time we enter it, the sand drives us back. We –"

My father roars. The sound is deafening and fierce. "I feel the children. My blood runs in their veins. I feel my son plotting against me. The ocean protects the coward and the sand protects the children."

"My lord –"

"And why aren't you tracking Zuko through the tunnels?" Ozai asks, his inflection low and dangerous as he crosses the length of the room and stares into the fire.

I flinch before I realize he can't see me and quell my natural desire to flee.

"They are constantly shifting, my lord. I've lost –"

"I don't care how many men you've lost, Admiral Reynard!" my father hisses. "I want Zuko's head on a pike. I want his Water Witch and his bastard children alive! I do not want any more excuses!"

The primal fire of my nation dances higher, reflecting my father's frustration and rage. I grin as I witness his fit of fury. He is powerless. A sense of empowerment embraces me and I feel strong. It's been so long since I have felt this way that I almost don't recognize it for what it is – hope.

"My lord!" I hear a familiar voice call to my father. The Fire Sage steps close to my father and kowtows to the deranged Fire Lord. It is the same Sage who dared to touch Katara. "Poison runs through her veins. I beg of you to reconsider your orders. The Water Witch must die. She bewitched your son. She convinced him to betray you."

Ozai growls, running a hand through his disheveled hair. "I want her. I am thirsty." His response is so soft and low the Sage does not hear him. It is then I realize how far into the realm of insanity my father has slipped. Though it does not look like he has aged, I can see the lines of stress around his mouth. Agitated movements replace the normally calm veneer. I should be worried that he desires Katara, but from what I have overheard the desert is protecting her.

I hear hissing nearby and feel the push of an unseen force. I fall from the fire and back into my own body. Exhaustion dwells within me and I close my eyes, entering dreams quickly and bracing myself for the nightmares that have become my constant companions.

I am almost taken aback as a passionate scene plays before me. It isn't long before I realize that I am watching Katara and myself. The cover of darkness shifts, revealing a third person. My breath hitches in my lungs as I realize it is Katara.

I close the distance between us quickly. "Katara," I whisper, afraid to touch her for fear that she may dissolve. The scene before us turns to mist.

"Katara," I repeat her name, but she does not respond.

"Go away," she whimpers. "I don't want to dream."

Grasping her shoulders, I turn her. "Katara?"

She won't open her eyes, but her lips seek mine. Flesh yields against flesh and I devour her. She sighs, opening her lips and granting me entrance. There are no spies, not threats hanging over us.

"I don't want to wake up," she groans, restlessly pushing clothes out of the way.

I am blinded by my need for her. We fall to the floor and become one, the sensation of her body surrounding mine makes me still with fear, for in all of the previous dreams, I have been consigned to feeling nothing. But now I feel everything.

"Katara?" I dare to hope that on some level we have connected. Her body is an invitation I cannot resist. When have I ever been able to resist her?

"Please," she whispers, her eyes still closed. "Don't stop."

"Open your eyes," I plead, needing reassurance that I am with her and not some phantom of my imagination.

"No," she replies, burying her face against my shoulder. "I don't want the dream to end. Not yet."

Her dream or mine, I do not know. "Please, Katara," I murmur, inhaling the scent of her hair. I am in agony, wanting to quench my thirst for this woman who haunts every moment of my existence. "I need to see your eyes. I need to know you and the children are all right."

She jerks beneath me, awareness dawning in her desire-laden expression. Her sky-colored eyes stare into mine. "Zuko," she breathes my name against my lips. "How is this possible?"

"I don't know," I groan, sinking deeper into her and feeling the dreamlike quality of this moment ebb and flow around us. Did I seek the core? Did I fall asleep while attempting to do so? Can I find my way out?

Whimpering beneath me, Katara rises up to meet me, her flesh yielding to mine and welcoming me as if I belong there. "I don't care," she whispers greedily, claiming my mouth and demanding passion.

Her offer is tempting, but my conscience will not allow such an indulgence. "Please, Katara. I need to know."

My seductress groans in pleasure. I feel her fingertips slide between our conjoined bodies as she brings herself to the blissful task. Perhaps this is only a dream. In my dream, she would have no answers. My self-doubt breaks my restraint and I hold onto her hips. Her body grips mine, calling forth my seed in a rush of ecstasy.

I collapse on top of her and shudder as I close my eyes. I know that when I open them she will be gone. Disappointment spreads throughout me and I rage at the injustice of being denied the simplest of dreams.

--

TBC


	17. Act II Chapter Five

Act II

Chapter 5

A/N – Mature content ahead. Heed the warning at the beginning of the story. Oh yeah! Avatar: The Last Airbender doesn't belong to me. Surprise! It is the intellectual property of Nickelodeon and its creators. I'm just mucking around in their universe.

--

Staring at my reflection in the pond, I do not recognize the person. I wiggle my hand back and forth to verify that it is my image. The boy in the reflection looks confused and tired, but he waves to me anyway. That's me. That's me in the pond. The only problem is that I don't know who I am.

I've been walking around for days. No one will talk to me. It's as though they do not see or hear me. Maybe they don't.

The water ripples as a leaf falls from a nearby tree, disturbing the reflection's worried expression. Gray eyes stare back at me as I study my features. Most peculiar are the blue arrows on my head and hands. I know the markings mean something, but I haven't a clue as to what.

I feel as though there is something important I need to do, but my lack of memories hinders my attention and my mind often wonders through time. The water reflects the truth. I am a boy, even though I feel much older. I am only a boy.

Yellow clouds float across the blood-red sky. I long to touch them, but realize that it would be impossible. I can't fly.

When I close my eyes, I see flashes of faces and places that hold no meaning to me. Some seem familiar while others seem new. I dream of a woman who cradles me in her arms. She sings to me. It's a little off-key, but I still find her voice pleasant and soothing. She has the bluest eyes I have ever seen, or at least, I think I've seen.

Lying back onto the grass, I fold my arms behind my head and study the clouds. One looks like a horned animal with a large flat tail. It has six legs and an arrow marking similar to mine. It is a cloud like none other, tickling memories of a past life.

--

My daughter stares at me with wide eyes as she takes a shuddering breath. I sing to her and she snuggles closer to me. Unlike her brother, she likes my singing. Iroh is asleep next to us, resting peacefully.

They celebrated their second birthday the other day. The sky was exceptionally dark that day. My fears for my children grow with them. What is Ozai waiting for? Does he still have the ability to rain fire upon the Earth?

I long to flee to the earthen caverns, but I do not want to risk Kaya's health. Song says the minerals of the sand and melted glacier nearby help keep my daughter's condition in check. She says Mahari foresaw this and that that was the reason we were allowed to travel to the desert.

A shiver runs down my spine as I recall my one and only encounter with the seer of the resistance. Over the time I have spent with Song and Ola, I have realized how orchestrated the last few years have been. My fear over the fate of Iroh festers within me. I do not want him to be the Avatar. I have learned that the Sandbenders have been charged with protecting us from the hunters that stalked me throughout my pregnancy. They provide for us, bringing us food and water and news from abroad. The desert is our home now.

My nightmares have turned from Ozai to Mahari. I can feel their desire to control my son. They would take him from me even now if they could. Ozai's wishes are blatant, whereas Mahari's are subtle. Is it possible that the seer is more dangerous than the monster?

Kaya shifts against me and breaks my line of thoughts, tempering my rising panic. My heart wrenches as I look from my daughter to my son. They are both so young, thrust into this world by prophecy and…love.

Zuko. Moments pass when resentment and hatred bubble in my memories. My feelings have turned into a complex conundrum. No matter how much I want to stop loving him, I can't. He haunts my dreams, making me ache with unresolved passion.

--

Surfacing from the core, I open my eyes and find Mahari watching me. It should make me uneasy, but it doesn't.

"What do you want?" I ask her, eyeing her skeptically.

"I have news." The seer crosses her legs in front of her as if trying to get comfortable.

Standing, I walk to an earthen basin, scoop up some water in my hands and splash it onto my face. "Are the troops in place? Will I be able to get into the palace to kill my father?"

"No," she replies quickly, irritated with the question that I ask her every time I encounter her. The resistance is scattered. Their numbers are few. Their constant shifting of the tunnels around us take most of their time. I am impatient and long to confront my father and put an end to it all.

"Then why are you here?" I do not look at the woman before me, for I know that she can see things that one may not want seen. I remember thinking her a savior, but now realize how deceitful she really is.

She sighs. "I have news of your children and your lover."

Time seems to stand still. It is the small moments in my life that make the most impact. My father scarred me for life, but that moment is a shadow compared to the day my uncle came back into my life. It was his companionship and wisdom that helped guide me toward the right path after the Agni Kai. It's moments like this that can make or break a man.

"They are well," she states, folding her hands into her sleeves. "You have a son and a daughter. Your son's name is Iroh and your daughter's name is Kaya. Katara looks well, but the separation and worry is a strain on her."

My heart is bitterness and joy. I have a family – one that I will likely never see. Katara, with her passionate nature and love, named my son, as I would have.

"Iroh was born first," Mahari continues, unperturbed by my lack of emotion. "He is the spitting image of his father…pale skin, yellow eyes, and dark hair. He is healthy and strong. Kaya looks like her mother. She is…sickly."

My head snaps up. "What?"

"She has great difficulty breathing, but the minerals of the melted glacier and sand soothe the condition."

"May I see them?" I blurt the question, already knowing the answer. If only I had a few moments with Katara to take back those things I said to her right before she left. If only I could take my children in my arms…

Mahari starts to back away, not answering the question. "It is late. You should get some rest."

I watch her retreat, troubled by her report. I would sell my soul to Koh for a glimpse of my family and the opportunity to touch Katara. Lying on my sleeping bag, I close my eyes and will thoughts of her to the forefront of my dreams.

--

_It is dark. I feel Katara's tight muscles surround my sex. I lie within her body, peppering kisses upon her face, tasting salty moisture. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean those things I said. Please forgive me."_

_She turns her head to avoid my kisses. "Please," she whimpers, terror edging the one word. _

_I shift, unwilling to break the intimate connection. I find the oil lamp with my hand and light illuminates the dream scene before me. I pull back in horror as I realize that my lover is bound to the bed – an unwilling sacrifice beneath me. _

_I try to withdraw from her, but I am leaden and not in control of my own movements. It is then that I see the figures surrounding us – the three Fire Sages and my father. _

_One of the sages laughs as I redouble my efforts to control the dream. "We have him. He is trapped within the dream."_

_Katara's dark skin shines with sweat and the sight of her breast enraptures me as it sways with each breath she takes. I taste the flesh, swirling my tongue around the erect bud and clamping down on it with unrestrained lust._

_She cries out, arching beneath me, her body trying to expel mine. "No, please! Stop!"_

_My body is not mine. I am helpless to prevent it. I want to close my eyes, but I can't even do that much as my body thrusts into hers over and over again. The ecstasy of sensation is too much and I fill her with my seed. _

"_No!" I bellow, struggling to protect her. _

_Katara stills beneath me, as if she is half-dead. My father circles the bed, coddling a bundle in his arms. Tears fall unchecked down Katara's face. _

"_Your daughter is beautiful," my father murmurs, pulling the blanket back from the slumbering child's face. "She looks just like her mother."_

_I am numb, forced to witness my disgrace. I am unable to protect anyone, let alone myself. _

_Ozai leans closer, showing Katara our child, but addressing me. "Do you really think the Water Witch will forgive you for sacrificing her children to me? Poor Iroh…always destined to die by my hand."_

_Katara lets out a strangled groan._

_My blood freezes in my veins and I am pushed away by an unseen force. Katara's bindings fall away and the sheets from the bed wrap around her like the wings of an avenging spirit. _

_The Fire Sages back away, one of them shouting that her actions are impossible. Kaya is yanked from my father's arms by her mother's powers, landing safely next to me. She is unaware of the turmoil around her._

_Hissing, Ozai stumbles backwards as numerous ice daggers – so many that it looks like a block of ice – protrude from his skin. He is covered in blood._

"_Release the dream!" A Fire Sage barks the command and the scene before me darkens into nothingness_.

--

My heart races as I wake to find my children sleeping peacefully by my side. The nightmare was so real. I can still feel the ghost of Zuko's touch on my skin and the rage over Ozai's words. Was the nightmare a warning? Was it sent to me as a foretelling of things to come? Am I going mad?

I am paralyzed with fear. Should I send Iroh away? The question whispers in my mind as silent tears slide down my cheeks. Why would Ozai kill Iroh? Why not Kaya?

I crawl from the bed and wrap a shawl around my shoulders.

"Katara?" Sokka's sleepy voice mumbles from across the room. "What is it? What's wrong?"

I look out the window, taking small comfort at the sight of the full moon in the sky. "It's nothing. Go back to sleep."

--

TBC

A/N – Special thanks to Moncaptian for slapping me upside the head and making me rewrite this chapter. This is the third draft of this chapter. Between pain and painkillers for my wrists, I've been pretty out of it. I apologize for the delay in posting.


	18. Act II Chapter Six

Act II

Chapter Six –

The more I think of that nightmare, the more ensnared I become in the mysticism Mahari has fostered among her followers. I call them that because they do not question her.

I do not believe in prophecy or predestination. Her actions, or more appropriately inactions, are responsible for my current circumstances. The resistance could have rescued Katara at any time. They could have prevented her suffering, but Mahari would not order the resistance to help. She wanted to make sure Katara was pregnant before she committed the resources.

I remember a time when Mahari used to give me hope. That hope is laced with the seeds of distrust now. I am stronger. I do not rely on hope to guide or influence me.

The dream was too real -- the feel of Katara's body around mine a blissful agony. I could feel her raw power surge around me as she attacked my father with her ice daggers. That and the abrupt ending of the dream led me to believe that it may have been more than nightmare.

As I make my way through the tunnels, I feel the stares of those I pass watch me. Mahari's teachings have cast me in the role of "savior." I hear them whisper the word and it sends a shiver coursing through me. Part of me shuns the title, while my other half embraces it.

"The savior shall deliver us from tyranny," their hopeful voices murmur as I search for our charismatic seer. I can only assume that they refer to my desire to kill my father. After all, he is the tyrant. That is my destiny. That is what I must realize before I meet my end. By killing my father, I will free so many…including my children and Katara.

Mahari steps from the shadows, unperturbed when the children run up to her and touch her robes. Her warm eyes meet mine and she motions for me to approach her.

I do so reluctantly, but I have too many questions that only she can answer. Out of respect, I bow.

She shoos the children away and returns my bow with one of her own, quickly turning and walking away from me. "You have questions," she states simply.

"Yes," I reply, following her through the groaning cavern of phosphorescent tunnels.

"I serve you," she says in a conciliatory tone. "You have but to ask."

She tries to placate me, but it only serves to widen the gap of distrust between us. "Is it possible to enter another person's dreams?"

She stops in her tracks and takes in my appearance as if seeing me for the first time. "You've been visited."

"What do you mean?" I question the seer.

Looking away, she begins to walk again and I follow her. "Tell me," she says encouragingly. "What was the dream about? What were you doing? How did you feel?"

"How did I feel? How did I feel?" My voice is filled with rage and echoes through the cave. "I was raping Katara! She begged me to stop! How do you think I felt?"

"Was anyone there?" She takes hold of my shoulders. For a moment, I feel as though she is going to offer me comfort, but she merely stares into my eyes. "Tell me about your dream. Do not leave any details out, not matter how small."

My stomach clenches with the memory, leaving a bitter taste in my mouth. "The Fire Sages and my father were there, watching as I…as I –"

"Say no more." Mahari places a finger over my lips to silence me. "I didn't realize they had grown so strong."

I turn away from her, crossing my arms over my chest, warding off the chill that clings to me like a second skin. "Who?"

"The Fire Sages," she answers softly. "I knew they were searching for the way, but didn't realize they had found it. Ozai's strength feeds them. It's probably a symbiotic relationship for I doubt your father can maintain his focus long enough to find you in dreams."

Her words make little sense to me.

Stepping in front of me, she puts her finger under my chin and lifts my head. "Everything is connected," she tries to explain. "The elements…dreams…the Spirit World. The Avatar maintains the balance between them all. I have traveled to the Spirit World and searched for Avatar Aang. He is not there."

"Then how can you think that one of my children is the Avatar?" I snap. The flawed logic irritates me.

"Legend says that the cycle will be broken if the Avatar is killed while in the Avatar state," Mahari continues. "It says that the cycle will end and that the Avatar will cease to exist. As I traveled from dream to spirit world, I had a vision of the continuous spiral of the cycle. The elements came in the order we have always learned, but when I got to the end of it, I saw two Air Nomads standing next to one another. I think a new cycle is beginning."

"There was more to my dream." I shudder as I recall my father holding my daughter.

"Tell me," she insists.

"Ozai…" my voice turns into a strangled whispered. "He was holding my daughter and telling me how he had killed my son."

Mahari's eyes widened. "They know!"

"What, Mahari. They know what?" I feel the strain of this conversation wearing on my strength.

Soulful brown eyes peer into mine. "Your daughter is the Avatar, not your son."

--

I haven't slept in days, the whisper of nightmares warning me to never close my eyes. I watch the horizon constantly, waiting for what I do not know.

Kaya and Iroh laugh in the distance as Sokka lets them ride him like an ostrich-horse. My three guardians and the healer stand nearby.

"You've got to get some rest, Katara," Song says soothingly. "I know the nightmares are bad, but –"

I make a strangled noise of despair in the back of my throat. I know she means well. I can't even tell them what the dreams are about. I just remember bits and pieces and the overlying theme of Zuko's betrayal. "I can't," I whisper.

"You must," she insists sternly. "What if… What if they come?"

I hear the desperation in her voice and I turn to study her. She is always so calm. To hear such fear in her voice is uncommon. It is then I realize the price every one has paid. They volunteered to follow me into the desert. They volunteered to protect the children and me. This has not been easy on them. I should be grateful for their companionship, but the fear that feeds my every waking moment blocks any rational thought.

"I won't go to sleep," I affirm, looking back to the sand for any signs of danger.

Song sighs. "Then you leave me no choice. Do it."

The earth bucks beneath my feet, breaking my determined stance, but it doesn't stop there as it wraps around me and holds me down. I am on the ground, feeling the stab of betrayal more deeply than anything I've imagined with Zuko. I hear the children squeal in the background. The sound is jovial. They are paying no mind to the attack on their mother. The probably think Toph is just messing around.

"I'm sorry Katara," Song says as she presses a cloth over my mouth. I try to turn my head, but an earthen band holds it in place. The noxious fumes gag me and my empty stomach roils in protest. I'd curse them, but my words and thoughts are slurred and blurry. A dark oblivion opens wide before me.

--

TBC

A/N – I do apologize for this chapter being so short, but my hands are worse and I must take more breaks than usual. The good news is that my insurance approved the trip to the hand specialist and I have an appointment with her next Friday.

I'd like to thank Moncapitan for smacking my muse around and keeping it on track. He really is a Godsend. Thanks to all who have reviewed. I try o answer all reviews, but can't to all. Some of you ask for me to send you notices of updates, but I don't have your email address. Please email me and I will put you on the list. Thanks again, everybody!


	19. Act II Chapter Seven

Act II

Chapter Seven

A/N – Warning! There is STRONG sexual content in this chapter. Any mistakes are my own.

--

I walk through the icy tundra of Katara's dream. At least I think it is Katara's dream. The freezing rain soaks my cloak and I shiver. Mahari warned me against feeling anything in dreams. They are merely trappings. In the distance, I see smoke rising from a pristine white chimney and begin to make my way toward the dwelling.

Snow crunches beneath my feet and my gut clenches. What do I say to her? How do I convince her that it isn't just a dream, that I am real, yet not real? How can I be sure that this isn't just some illusion – a dream that I have created to assuage my guilt and honor?

I ignore the bite of the cold and forge ahead, approaching and touching the icy surface of the igloo. The wind howls around me as if trying to warn me away. This is Katara's dream. I can feel sorrow on the wind.

Dropping to my knees, I crawl through the tunnel and make my way into the warmth that I know awaits me.

Katara is sitting next to the fire, hugging her knees and rocking as if in pain. Her gaze settles on me and I see a flicker of recognition in her eyes. It is not a welcoming gaze. Her eyes are icy and remote, as if she has purposely removed herself from feeling anything at all.

"I was wondering when you would show up," she says dully, standing up and grasping a poker to tend the fire. Once done, she points it toward me. "You're always in my dreams – good and bad. I've tried to avoid this. I need to stay strong for the children, but Song used some kind of herb to make me sleep. I'm trapped. Do your worst."

I feel the strain of maintaining the connection to her dream and concentrate on the details of Katara's beauty. She looks wary – like she is being stalked. "You have to listen, Katara." I put my hands up in a conciliatory manner. I welcome the sting of pain as warmth returns to my limbs. I embrace all sensation, desperate to hold Katara and feel her flesh yield to mine. Rounding the fire, I stop as she takes a step back.

"Why should I listen to you?" she hisses. "You have no idea what it's like. You don't know what it's like, being slowly driven insane."

"Katara?" Her name on my lips is a raspy whisper. I can see the fear in her eyes. I can hardly remember why I'm here as I feel her sorrow and fear wash over me.

She threatens me with the hot poker. She does not trust herself, much less me.

"Surely you know…" I plead, referring to our shared nightmare. "That wasn't me. The Sages controlled everything. I had no control. I was like a puppet and they the puppet master. You must understand what they are capable of, Katara. They capture dreams, twisting them, torturing… That dream… I don't know if it was yours or mine. We've been connected all this time."

--

I hear the catch in his voice and drop the hot poker. The hopelessness in his inflection lures me closer. I can feel heat, whether it's from him or the fire, I do not know. I want to trust him, but I don't even trust myself at this point. I am drawn to him. "My people believe that dreams foretell the future. I don't trust myself. How can I trust you?"

He snatches my hand and kisses the center of my palm, his tongue grazing the sensitized skin. "Trust this, Katara. I am flesh and bone," he whispers, his voice thick with desire.

I want to pull back, but his touch enthralls me. If this is a trap, I enter it willingly. I stand perfectly still, doing nothing to stop him, yet doing nothing to encourage him. The ache that consumes me is an unbearable torment. He kneels before me and touches my necklace, dragging his knuckles across the slope of my neck.

"You're safe in the desert. Stay there. Ozai can't reach you there, but he can torment your dreams. You must guard them – remember that I love you. Do not give into the insanity of the nightmares." He tugs on the sash of my dress, loosening it and quickly disposing of it. "Let me make love to you, Katara. No spies. No threats hanging over our heads…just you and me."

His words are so tempting. "You promised that you would never leave me. You promised that we would find a way out together," I remind him sullenly. My bindings dissolve in this imaginary realm and I stand naked before him. Taking advantage of this, Zuko kisses the creamy slope of my right breast, quickly drawing the nipple into his mouth.

I arch my back in welcome, feeling the familiar spark of bitter lust that has always accompanied my feelings for Zuko. I run my fingers through his hair. I widen my stance and welcome his touch upon my skin.

"Lie with me, Katara," he rasps, relinquishing his hold and trailing kisses of liquid fire along the swell of my breast and ribs. "I want to make love to you as I should have before the world fell apart around us."

"Zuko." I fall to my knees and offer him everything that I am – a fractured soul that lives only to protect my children. He takes my breath away with his demanding kiss, no longer seeking permission, but commanding compliance. The ardent pressure builds and I part my lips in welcome. He sweeps his tongue inside as if memorizing each taste and texture. It makes me dizzy. His hands are everywhere, holding me to him and stroking intimate places.

The warm animal fur on the floor touches my back as my lover relinquishes his hold and moves over me. Instead of the seeking probe of needy flesh I expect, I feel his fingers as he explores my feminine core. The glide of his tongue along my inner thigh leaves me trembling. He is there, looking at me. I should feel shame, but I want him to touch me so badly that I cry out. "Please!"

He places a gentle kiss between my intimate folds and I come undone, bucking wildly against his face. He groans in appreciation, greedily taking my essence into his body like a starved man.

I do not open my eyes. I'm afraid that if I do, the dream will be over or worse, turn into a nightmare. Zuko's attentions bring me to a shattering release. My body pulses around his fingers and he keeps pleasuring me as if it is all he knows how to do.

He shifts his weight and is above me. "Open your eyes," he whispers, kissing my eyelids. "This is real, Katara. I am flesh and blood."

He blankets my body with his, resting his hips in the cradle of mine. His lips capture mine, stealing my last breath. His gentleness brings tears to my eyes. The feel of his flesh pressing against my moist core encourages me to open my thighs wider. Golden eyes stare into mine as Zuko gently pushes his flesh into my tightness. He is not only taking my body, He is claiming my soul.

Tears well in my eyes and spill unchecked down my cheeks.

He kisses them away. "Don't cry," he begs, shivering.

--

This is a dream I would gladly lose myself in.

Say the words, Katara," I husk. "Tell me that you love me." I am a selfish being. I don't think I shall ever grow tired of hearing her breathless declarations.

She bites her lip as I kiss her tears away.

"Don't cry." I shudder above her, trying to temper the hunger that calls for me to sate it.

She whimpers beneath me. "I'll always love you –"

The last of her words are muffled as I claim her lips in a bruising kiss.

"My dream…" she whispers, her speech slightly slurred. Her eyes are glazed as they swim with unshed tears and passion. Her hands travel the expanse of my back lazily, as if she is in a trance.

"Not a dream," I gasp, holding onto her. I have to find a way to convince her otherwise. "I'm real, Katara. I'm in your dream."

Arching her back, she cries out as oblivion carries her away. I feel her feminine sheath tighten around my flesh. I can do no other than follow her. Grasping her hips, I thrust into her frantically and welcome the rush of release.

--

The warm gush of his seed coats my inner channel. The sensation is surreal. My emotions are raw. He keeps telling me that he is really with me, but I know that is not so. He is far away, destined to meet his father one last time.

As he holds his weight above me, I study his sorrowful, yet sated expression. A golden fire burns in his eyes and he rolls onto his side, pulling me with him and making me gasp as he deepens our connection.

"You still think this a dream," he murmurs softly, palming the flesh of my breasts and rolling my nipples between the pads of his fingers and thumb. "How can I convince you otherwise?"

Exhaustion overcomes me and I collapse on his chest. I am trapped in this dream. I can feel the lethargy of the herbs Song forced upon me. "Of what?" I mumble, confusion marring the haze of blissful abandon. I close my eyes and wonder if it is possible to sleep in a dream.

"Don't go to sleep, Katara." He plays with my hair, his own voice sounding groggy and peaceful. "Guard your thoughts and dreams. You're safe in the desert. My father cannot reach you there. The Sages fight in dreams, corrupting all thoughts and turning them into nightmares. They seek to drive me insane. I fear they will do the same to you."

Gathering my strength, I push against his pale chest and look at him. The lines around his mouth are testament to his permanent frown. His scar is more defined. The love he feels for me reflects in the depths of his eyes. The flex of his body within mine is so real. His words send a shiver down my spine as I realize the depth of the imagery that has carried me away. I have never dreamed in such detail before.

There is another presence – a benign soul hovering around us. I tense and prepare to defend myself.

His hands run up and down my forearms. "It's Mahari," he explains. "Just as the Sages anchor my father to dreams, she anchors me. Do not be afraid."

None of this makes any sense. "Dreams are sacred to my people – visions of things to come or visits from the Spirit World."

Then it occurs to me. Perhaps Zuko is dead. There is a strange twisting sensation in my chest. I can barely ask the question. "Are you dead?"

"Not yet." His laughter echoes in my mind as the waves of slumber recede and I wake.

--

TBC


	20. Act II Chapter Eight

Act II

Chapter Eight

--

Staring into the element that always reminds me of Zuko, I chew my bottom lip and rock Kaya in my lap as I nurse her. I can feel my friends watching me – Song in particular. She has been tiptoeing around me ever since I woke up.

Yes, I was angry with her. I was angry with all of them. But they were right. I needed the rest. I didn't realize how much the lack of sleep had affected my health, much less my children. I had become withdrawn, forcing my children to seek affection and comfort somewhere else. They are at a delicate age, needing constant reassurance and guidance.

I try to seek comfort by the fire, but the flames only torment me. I skate close to the edge of insanity as I try not to think of my last dream. It was just a dream, right? A highly erotic dream that had physically left me wet and oddly sore. I remember every detail. That is the problem. The details frighten me.

"It would help if you talked about them," Song says from across the fire, her gaze trained upon me.

I look to her and see Ola sitting next to her. Ola is feeding my son small bites of finely chopped meat and vegetables. Sokka is in bed, and Toph and the Boulder are on watch outside. "About what?" I question her, knowing full well what she is referring to.

"I watched over you." The healer exhales, controlling her frustration over my lack of disclosure and obvious stubbornness. "Your dreams keep you awake. If you talk about them, you can control them."

"They are the future…visits from the Spirit World," I whisper, repeating the teachings of my people.

"Dreams are what you make of them," Ola replies, cooing to my son and coaxing him to eat the vegetables.

A lump forms in my throat. I've always had a difficult time believing in the intangible practices of my tribe, but they have been ingrained upon me since the moment I was born. I have dreamt of my mother ever since her death, taking a small measure of comfort in her "visitations." It is strange that I have not dreamt of her since the comet arrived.

"Have…" My voice catches as I clear the lump from my throat. "Have either of you had a dream where it seemed so real that you ache from it? He kept telling me he was real…that he…"

"Who?" Song coaxes me into revealing my dream.

With a shuddering sigh, I retell the story, edging around the intimate details, but capturing the important highlights. "Is it true? Can people walk in dreams?"

The healer's eyes are wide as she looks at the former Zhang leader who shrugs her shoulders in confusion. "Only the Maharishi are capable of dream-walking. They bridge the gap between souls," Song replies, her answer doing little to comfort me.

"Zuko said Mahari was anchoring him to my dream." Kaya shudders in my arms, drowsy with sleep. Slipping a finger between her lips and my breast, I move her in my lap and she emits a hearty belch. Out of habit, I listen to her breathing. "Is that possible?"

"The Maharishi is an Earth Kingdom religious sect that claims mystic powers. They were advisors to the king in the old times. There are seers and dream-walkers. They were touted as assassins, killing people in their dreams and making it look like the person died in their sleep."

I can feel my tenuous grasp on reality slipping as I consider the healer's words. I look across the fire to Iroh, then down at Kaya. The original nightmare is always on the cusp of my thoughts. I have watched my children sleep, enjoyed the wondrous sound of them laughing as they dreamt.

I want to shake Kaya to prevent her from going to sleep, but I know I mustn't. Everything is connected -- the elements, the living, the dead, and even dreams. Are my children being hunted in their dreams?

"No, Katara." Song does her best to calm me as she studies my rising panic. "You have to sleep. So do the children. We'll watch over them as they sleep…wake them if they seem distressed."

Kaya looks peaceful as she drifts off. I will do anything to protect my children, even stave off sleep deprivation and insanity.

--

It has been a week since I _visited_ Katara's dream. Mahari need not reassure me that it was real. I know that it was, for I could have never imagined the changes that I saw in her.

The haunted look in her eyes was unmistakable. Even in the most difficult of times, Katara had always managed to keep a spark of hope in her eyes. I pray to Agni that I managed to give her some of that hope back. I pray that she believed me…that she knew I was real and that she wasn't alone.

I want to go back. I want to hold her and tell her that I love her and that everything is going to be all right. I want to tell her how sorry I am…that I couldn't protect her. But I can't go back.

Mahari says it is too dangerous. She is convinced that the Sages cannot find the path to Katara. She is convinced that they can only reach her through me. As long as I stay away from her, they cannot harm her.

I don't know what to think anymore. I warned her to guard her dreams. She seemed so frail, so afraid, but I could sense her determination, her will to survive anything. That is what I love most about Katara – her will.

I ignore the ever-present ache in my heart. There is so much I must do that it overwhelms me at times. I wish I had half the courage Katara has. I will not survive the confrontation with my father. Of that, I am sure. In the very least, I pray to Agni that I am able to drag his corrupt soul into the Spirit World with me and make the world safe for the children.

--

TBC

A/N – I cannot apologize enough for the length of this chapter. I used to have moderate carpal tunnel. Now, it is severe. All options have been exhausted, and I am currently in the process of getting approval for surgery from my lovely HMO insurance company. To say the least, this story is going to be delayed. I don't know for how long. I will probably get one more chapter cranked out before the actual surgery. If not, I have included an extra scene beneath the author's notes. Scroll down. This is the happy ending I promised everybody, but it is subject to change. It contains mature content.

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Title: A Look

--

Her serene gaze catches mine from across the room. Even after fifteen years, she still takes my breath away. For a moment, the sound of blood rushing through my veins blocks the insipid conversation of the honored guests around me. I excuse myself from the room of dignitaries and make my way through the great halls, out of the noise, and into the peaceful garden.

Crickets chirp in concert, doing nothing for the fire that burns in my veins for Katara. I look toward the palace, waiting for her to join me. I am not a patient man.

I want her.

The clack of wood on wood heralds my lover's arrival as she moves over the bridge. My passion for her has no bounds. I doubt she will be able to return to the celebration after I am through with her. I hide in the shadows and watch her demure figure make its way from the bridge and into the garden.

She is dressed in the way of my people, the finest silk of red and gold hiding her womanly curves from me. I shall pluck the combs from her hair and ruin the elaborate design. The more I think about what I shall do to Katara the more I doubt that I shall return to the celebration.

She is getting closer, peering into the shadows and whispering my name, but I do not answer her. Blood rushes through me, centering in my crotch and hardening my sex. I touch myself through the fabric of my trousers and envision my lover on her knees and opening her luscious lips to receive my hot seed. The alluring scent of lavender, chamomile, and ylang-ylang invades my olfactory nerves as she steps closer to me.

"Zuko," she calls my name into the darkness and I smile. She still doesn't see me. She steps into my shadowed realm and I take a step back, almost afraid to lose the perfection of the moment.

"Over here," I answer, my voice so husky that I hardly recognize it.

Her shadow slinks toward me, her passionate nature leading her toward my ravenous intentions. Grasping her wrist, I yank her against me and seal my lips over hers. I want to be gentle, but I can't. I am not a gentle man. I push my tongue against hers, in silent demand that it duel with mine. Her lips and tongue welcome my invasion, and I greedily sip the moans of unresolved lust.

I pull the combs from her hair and fist my fingers in the silken strands. Pulling her hair, I tilt her head back and feast on the delicate flesh of her jaw and the arch of her neck. I mean to mark her. I want the whole world to know that she is mine.

Katara's breathless "yeses" feed the flame of my desire for her. She strokes my member through my trousers, cupping the weight of my sacs in her palm.

My trembling fingers undo the eyelets of her robe and claw the material away from her bosom. Her breasts spill free and I stoop to taste the temptation of her dark skin. She jerks in my arms as I lap at the sensitive flesh of her nipples. They have become even more sensitive due to her condition. She is newly pregnant with our fourth child. It is amazing we do not have more children. I cannot control myself whenever I am around her.

She is my anchor. Without her, I would slip into the madness that lingers in my blood. She is the water that cools the fire within me.

Her hand slides into my pants and I feel the firm grasp of her hand surround the center of my needy flesh. She strokes me, fanning the embers of my lust for her.

Breaking away, I lead her from the shadows and into a small alcove of light with a cement bench in the center. Katara tries to touch me, but I still her movements and capture her wrists. If she touches me, I'll explode.

--

When his golden gaze met mine from across the room, I knew my time at the celebration was over. I followed him into the garden, anticipating his intentions.

Breathlessly, I yield to his silent commands as he guides me to the cement bench. He could have me on the ground for all I care. I knew my dress would not survive his affections. I wouldn't mind if it was stained as well.

Grasping the slight bulge of my abdomen and both my wrists, he dances me toward the bench, deftly bending me over it and lifting the folds of my dress. I hold onto the cool stone and widen my stance in invitation as he rolls my underwear down my thighs far enough to give him the access he desires.

His hands grasp my buttocks, molding the soft flesh as though he owns it. I arch my back wantonly, teasing him with my wet sex. I gasp in pleasure and shock as his fingers spread me open. The dart of his tongue sends me spiraling out of control. I am no longer inhibited with him. This position should embarrass me, but it doesn't. Zuko has shown me pleasure beyond my wildest imaginings. He has claimed me in ways I never thought possible.

He kisses and licks my intimate places, groaning in appreciation as he drinks the nectar from my core. I am helpless to contain the flow and he laps at my essence greedily with each push and pull of his tongue.

I cry out in ecstasy as he pulls away long enough only to replace his tongue with his long fingers. He thrusts them into me and seeks the spongy tissues deep inside my core. I cry out as my muscles clench round his fingers.

"Come for me, Katara." His breath is hot against my backside.

--

Rubbing frantic circles around her clitoris with one hand, I mimic the thrust of a lover's flesh with my other. Katara is so uninhibited. She will give me anything I ask for. It isn't long before she cries out her release, the gentle squeeze of her muscles makes me harder than I ever imagined.

Standing, I remove enough of my clothing to free my readied organ. Grasping her hips, I surge forward and bury myself in her welcoming heat. The coupling is hurried and desperate. She is like the blue flame, elusive and hot, calling forth my male essence in a rush of unadulterated bliss.

I hear voices in the distance and withdraw from the haven of her body, adjusting my clothing with an economy of motion I have grown accustomed to. I shrug off my tunic and help my wife to cover her ruined dress.

"I thought I saw them go this way," our four-year-old daughter's voice chatters excitedly.

"You should leave your mother and father alone, Mina," a patient, if not exhausted voice chastises in the distance. "Your father has great responsibilities. He rarely gets time alone with your mother."

I can hardly contain my smile as Mahari chases after our daughter. The seer has become my most trusted advisor, saving my life on more than one occasion. She understands my need for Katara.

"Pa Pa!" Mina shouts shrilly, paying no mind to decorum as she runs toward me.

Dropping to my knees, I open my arms in greeting. I missed so much with Iroh and Kaya, but I was a part of Mina's entry into this world – a world that is now balanced and calm.

Mina pulls away, eying me shrewdly. "Why is Ma Ma wearing your tunic?"

I smile, lifting my daughter in my arms. My gaze meets Katara's. She is blushing furiously.

"Ma Ma caught her dress on a branch and tore it," I explain, staring at Mahari in challenge as she smirks.

"I wanted to say goodnight," Mina says, grabbing my cheeks and forcing me to stare into her yellow eyes. "I missed you. I always miss you and Ma Ma."

Smiling, Katara steps closer, pressing against me and curling one of Mina's jet black curls around her finger. My daughter knows how to manipulate me. Once she was born, I could feel the connection between us. Her tiny hand on my scarred flesh humbles me every time. In her eyes, I can do no wrong. She doesn't know that I have the blood of my sire on my hands, the guilt of my past always weighing heavily upon my shoulders.

"Go with your mother and Mahari," I instruct her firmly. "I will be there shortly."

Our daughter pouts, but does as she is told. Katara casts a look over her shoulder as she walks away from me. Her gaze holds the promise of passionate lovemaking once I return.

--

A/N – This isn't the end of the story. It's merely a preview of things to come. I hope you enjoyed it. As always, I appreciate any constructive comments and criticisms.


	21. Act II Chapter Nine

Act II

Chapter Nine --

The pain of separation gnaws at me as seasons blend together and mark the passage of time. I long to visit Katara's dreams, but Mahari says it is too dangerous. Instead, I seek the core daily, spying on my father and gathering intelligence for the resistance. Seeing the madness in my father's eyes as he rants and babbles, I realize how feeble he has truly become. Yes, he controls Sozin's comet and continues to hold all the nations hostage. But his power has come with a heavy price – his sanity.

I don't know whether to be grateful or fearful for his current state of mind. Insane, he has lost his focus, but he has gained an edge that most do not consider. The insanity has created an atmosphere of fear that has no rival. My nation's history is peppered with bloody, nonsensical violence, but it has never been as it is now. Daily executions are held, whether for sport or political motivations, I do not know. Nor do I care.

I have learned my father's true motivation. As the fragments of Sozin's comet corrupt the purity of the elements, it seeps into the other realms like a malignant cancer. It is not only our planet that is in danger; it is the very fabric of our existence. Ozai seeks to conquer the Spirit World. With the knowledge of generations past, he will become omnipotent and undefeatable.

I crouch in the dense bushes, ignoring the sting of mosquitoes as they bite into my flesh. The sound of the crickets is almost deafening. I can't remember the last time I was above ground at night. My father's madness has provided the kind of distraction that allows me to remain above ground.

My mind wanders. I can't help myself. Katara is never far from my thoughts. I know she is safe in the desert. So are the children. My father cannot send the fiery rain down for fear that he may hit my daughter. I immediately chastise myself, bringing myself to task.

I focus on what needs to be done. I focus on my father. I have spent months training for the moment that is close at hand. As I crouch in the shadows, I keep my mind blank and my soul dark. I know nothing of troop movements or raids. My connection with my father is both a liability and a gift. The resistance is in place.

I wait for the signal that will herald the beginning of the end, drawing the guards away from their master.

Staying focused grows increasingly difficult as my mind strays to memories of my lover. I have given up trying to remember what she looks like. Only the color of her eyes remains locked in the depths of my mind. They are blue, I think. Besides, my memories would never do her justice.

The ground shifts beneath my feet, rolling toward the nearby garrison. I can scarcely believe we have come this far. It has taken so long to gather the scattered remnants of the resistance to inflict any real damage against my father's loyal followers. The constant shifting of the tunnels requires round the clock attention from all Earthbenders.

With strategic precision, the garrison collapses in on itself. Not even the metal frame and foundation are able to withstand the laws of physics. Alarms blare and I hear the sounds of war saturate the air around me. Death comes from below, rising from the ground as giant pillars meant to rend the hastily repaired structures asunder emerge – all of them except the throne room.

My father is there. They have left the throne room alone for me to complete my mission – to kill my sire.

He probably knows I am on my way, but I shall make him wait. The bitterness of my revenge pumps through my veins. Reaching behind myself, I touch my broadswords in reassurance. Mahari gave them to me at the last minute, telling me to call upon my natural talents. I ignore the look in her eyes. It is an unenviable look – one that says I won't be coming back. I don't need any more distractions.

An explosion jumps high into the night sky, marking the end of the armory.

With practiced stealth, I steal across the courtyard, using the added shadows that the firelight of destruction has afforded me. Slicing through the flimsy paper screens that serve as doors, I enter my father's lair. I move with stealth past the temple of the Fire Sages and into the throne room. I am a shadow even in my own mind.

I can feel the heat from the ancestral fire as it seethes and writhes in time with my father's rage. Sheathing my broadswords, I blast the door open with a quick burst of fire that sends the Sages scrambling toward my father to protect the man who is Agni incarnate.

I make no attempt to disguise my approach or contempt as I round the giant red columns that pepper the room.

"My son," the man who sired me hisses. "Welcome back."

I say nothing, keeping my eyes on the holy men who clamor around him. The one on the right steps down, taking a defensive posture as my father watches with veiled interest.

The Fire Sage hurls poisoned daggers at me, which I deflect easily with my broadswords. I dispatch him quickly, slicing bits and pieces of flesh from his body, before I run him through.

Pulling my sword from his body, I sidestep his body as he falls forward. The smell of blood assaults my olfactory nerves, lending a rush of adrenaline to my pounding heartbeat.

I turn toward my father and the second Sage comes at me. He bends the fire nearest him in an attempt to harm me. His attempt fails miserably as I reflect his attempt and turn it back against him. As the flesh peels from his bones, he runs screaming into the night.

The third and final Sage steps in front of his master. His attack is much more focused as he harnesses the fire from the ornate lanterns around the room and sweeps it at my feet. I see the satisfied smirk on his face turn to disbelief as I leap into the air and land safely next to him. Swinging my broadsword through the muscle, bone, and sinew of his neck, it takes a brief moment before the momentum of the action yields its desired effect. His head rolls onto the floor and his carcass falls to its knees.

As I draw closer, I find my father's sarcastic, impassive features have changed into offended hatred. He is no longer the youthful godlike man of long ago, but a dangerous shell of a resentful spirit, waiting to pass into the next world.

He applauds my display of bravado with mocking pride, not even bothering to stand up to face the threat that is before him.

"Well done, my son." He spits fire from his mouth and I leap back in retreat, hurling fire from the bottom of my right foot as I bring it down in a round kick. My attempt barely fazes him and he waves it away.

Our destructive element surrounds me. I break through the wall of fire and retreat behind one of the pillars.

"I couldn't have thought of a more befitting end for the charlatans who coveted my power." Ozai stands and nudges the headless carcass aside with his booted foot.

Bracing myself against the column, I close my eyes and listen for his approach. I hear only the pounding of my heart and uneven breathing.

"Why have you come back, Zuko?" he asks. "Have you come to beg for forgiveness? Have you come to reclaim your honor?"

He means to lure me out, but I know better than to answer him. The shadows protect me now. The fire lends its strength to the illusions of the dark.

"I see you have regained your bending abilities," Ozai continues to banter with the shadows. "Did Mahari show you how to seek the core? Or was it Jeong Jeong?"

Across the vast space of the throne room, I see him. More appropriately, I see his reflection in the shimmering waters of the reflective pond. Irony does not sway me any more as I consider the representative of each element throughout the room.

There are a multitude of windows throughout the room, signifying the element of air. By each entrance door, there is a bowl of earth that Agni and his followers are supposed to sprinkle onto the floor. Even the gods recognize the interconnectedness of the elements. Lastly, my lover's element gleams in the distance like a shining beacon – a ray of hope.

My father stalks me with a limp, tossing short bursts of fire around as though he is unable to control himself. He is hoping to flush me out. "Come out and make it quick, Zuko. Upon my honor, I will make it quick. Although… I could let you live."

The ancestral fire crouches low and my father's reflection disappears as he moves behind a grouping of columns. Gripping the handles of my broadswords tighter, I circle the column at my back.

"Go into the desert," my father's voice echoes against the walls. "Kill the Water Witch and the male child. Bring me the girl and I shall reconsider the penance for your serious lack of judgment."

An explosion sounds outside, shaking the very foundations of the throne room and causing plaster to fall from the ceilings. Some of it splashes into the water, disrupting the tranquil pool.

My father chuckles. "My soldiers are chasing your friends away. Who will save you now?" Realizing that I will not answer him, he tosses a circular pattern of fire around the room. All of the pillars are on fire now, including the one I am standing behind. I can wait no longer. I must complete my mission.

Stepping out from behind the pillar, I take a defensive stance and prepare to meet my end. "No one," I answer him. "I will carry out my mission."

His sneer is malicious. My father's laughter is mad and cruel. "Do you seek the core, Zuko? Are you trying to call upon your meager abilities to save yourself?"

I sheath my swords, knowing I will have to fight fire with fire if I am to weaken him. Feeling the warm tingle of flames gather within my core, I hurl it toward my father in a long, blue burst of the hottest flame.

He breaks my attempt with his forearms, staggering backwards and ducking behind a burning column.

Emboldened, I pursue him, summoning my entire being and attacking with every move I know.

He is like a caged animal, lashing out in all directions, his strikes deadly, but unfocused. I can feel his madness skirting the edge of my thoughts.

_"We are one," _his voice hisses in my mind. _"Kill me. In death, I shall grow stronger. Flesh of my flesh, through you I am immortal._

Images cloud my mind – visions of carnage and bloodlust. I watch as I make my way through the desert, finding the oasis that Katara and the children call home. I move around the glacier and into the desert abode. Darkness surrounds me, and when I open my eyes, a woman and a child are dead at my feet.

"That is the future, my son," Ozai rasps harshly. "I am a part of you. You think me insane with power. I am omnipotent, claiming domain over all that is of this world and the next. The future will be written in blood – the blood of your son and lover."

I feel the weight of his presence within me. I stagger and fall to my knees, the last vestiges of hope flying away as if it is an elusive butterfly. This is a power I have no defense against. My father is inside my mind, feeding my fears and nightmares.

Flames encircle me. They feel real as they lick at my skin like a cruel lover's kiss. I am reminded of how quick and efficient my father was during the Agni Kai of my youth. He toys with me, taunting me with his power.

"The power of the sun is ten fold that of the core of this planet," he informs me, his cackle of satisfaction drifting along the flames that burn my skin.

"Did you really think you could defeat me?" he asks, circling me as I feel patches of my clothes melt against my skin. The fire is blue. By nature it should burn quickly, but my father has tempered the element and it works at my flesh with agonizing efficiency.

I make no sound as the pain calls to my spirit. By all rights, I should be dead. His laughter rings in my ears as I search for the technique that will end my suffering. Closing my eyes I abandon all hope and welcome the fire around me. I take it into my body and I feel it searing my internal organs.

"I have seen you in the fire," Ozai taunts me, as I grip my broadswords in my hands. "I control everything, Zuko. All of the elements yield to me. Water evaporates. Air is consumed. Earth turns to liquid. Fire is my gift to the world. Only I can call upon the true nature of the beast! I control the sun."

I try to speak, but I can't. My throat burns.

My father climbs the stairs and sits on the throne. "Once I claim your child as my own, I shall have dominion over the Spirit World," he sneers, licking his lips. "And I will have the Water Witch as well. I will keep her, break her will, and use her over and over again. I could die of thirst just thinking of her."

Katara! Her memory surfaces through the haze of pain, a whisper of encouragement for my desperate soul. I look at my father. He is older, his madness taking away from his youthful looks. His quest for immortality will hold me hostage forever. If he claims dominion over the Spirit World, no one will be free.

My clothes have melted against what flesh remains. My spirit will never rest unless my father's accompanies it.

With the last of my strength, I toss the sword in my right hand into the air, catching the hilt and redirecting the blade's deadly path. There is no sound as the metal catches my father in the chest, impaling him to the back of the ornate throne. The flames rise above me as blood spurts from his wound and mouth. The look on his face is indescribable.

Fire consumes me as his wrath heralds my own death.

"Zuko!" a voice cries out as darkness consumes me.

--

End Act II

A/N – Of course, Zuko isn't dead. I was going to include a Katara part, but I think this chapter can stand alone. As always, thanks to all who have reviewed. It keeps the creative fire of the muse burning. (He he! Pun in intended.)

To say the least, this story is going on a long hiatus due to my surgery. I'm just glad I was able to finish this act before that.

I really have to thank Moncapitan, Savriti, and Spleefmistress. They smack me around and give excellent constructive criticism when it is needed. Thank you, guys!


	22. Act III Chapter One

Act III

Bitter Spirits

Chapter One

--

I miss tea! I miss the way the steam warms my face and that first burst of sensation as the liquid warms my tongue. Luckily, I no longer hunger for food, for I am a non-corporeal being now – lost and astray. I have little memory of how I died. I seem to recall a giant fireball, but that seems so fantastical that even I have difficulty believing it. Then, of course, I am a master Firebender. Maybe something went wrong.

I know that I am dead; my short time with Lu Ten having shown me that there really is life after death. I just can't seem to find my way to the Spirit World. I've been there, and this isn't it.

The red haze above us prevents us from ascending into the stars. By us, I mean the Avatar's pets and myself. I am certain that the red clouds block the path to the Spirit World. I was saddened to see that they would be making the journey with me. I know how Aang will grieve for them.

I have seen many ghosts roaming this realm, waiting to pass on. Something is terribly wrong. It is as though the gate to the Spirit World has closed. At least, I think there was a gate the last time I visited. Things were so hazy back then that I honestly don't remember.

I have even seen Azula roaming close by. Apparently, the gate to the Dark Land is also closed. But, who am I to judge Azula's soul?

I have spoken with her. She seems repentant, but I know her manipulative, scheming ways are far from over. She says she died from a fever around the time the fireball claimed my life. She blames her father.

Her accusations send a chill down my spine. I never paid much attention to the reasoning behind Sozin's War. I did as I was told, wanting to please my father, Azulon, and my nation. I fought because I was born to do so. I led because it was my destiny.

Apparently destiny had other plans. I, General Iroh, the Dragon of the West, am dead. I have no difficulties accepting my fate, but am perplexed as to why my kami has been detained. Perhaps I don't have as clean a slate as I thought I did. But I cannot see the reasoning as to why the air bison and the lemur are with me. They should have entered the Spirit World. Their souls are pure.

I shudder as I consider everything around me. We are not the only spirits who are trapped between this world and the afterlife. There are others we have encountered. I fear the worst. I fear the rumors are true.

When I was a child, my father told me of the power of Sozin's comet. Legend states that it will give its user incredible power, even power over other realms. I fear that this has come to pass. I fear that my brother has harnessed the power of the comet.

If this is so, then the Avatar may be too late.

Time is an illusion here. There are no sunsets or moonrises to mark the elusive concept. I can only wait and care for Appa and Momo until the Avatar comes for us.

--

I wonder through the desert, my memories fractured and nonsensical. There are more like me, but they cannot help. They are trapped like I am. I know there is someplace else that I must be, but I cannot remember where. In the distance I see a crude rendition of a village. It looks familiar, but I am not sure.

Cocking my head to the side, I read the sign, barely able to make out the worn words. "Misty Palms Oasis." This place seems so familiar. Walking past the sign, I see a crater in the center of the town. It bubbles and spits steam into the air, momentarily obscuring my vision.

Rambunctious laughter breaks my concentration and a burly man dressed in dark green pants runs into the courtyard. He is carrying a child – a little girl with dark hair and sparkling blue eyes – on his back.

"Run, Uncle Boulder!" she squeals and kicks him like he is her own personal ostrich horse.

A little boy bursts through the door and points his finger at them as if to shoot them. "Fire!" he yells excitedly.

The little girl giggles excitedly, the perfection of her laughter marred by her struggle to breathe. "Mommy's a…Water…bender, not a…Fireben…der!" she wheezes.

"I can be anything I want, Kaya," the boy retorts sharply, ignoring his sister's struggle. "Right, Uncle Boulder?"

Swinging the little girl from his broad shoulders, the Boulder carries Kaya like a precious porcelain doll toward the bubbling goop. "Yes, Iroh," the man agrees readily. "Now go get your mother, Iroh."

Rolling his eyes, the four-year-old runs indoors.

I should feel comforted by the scene, but it disturbs me in some ways. The little girl's eyes narrow and stare straight at me.

"Who is…that?" she asks her uncle, as he cradles her in his arms and nears the crater.

"Who?" the Boulder questions her, setting her on the rim of earth next to the bubbling mixture of minerals and water.

"That boy over there," she whispers breathlessly, pointing directly at me.

The man looks through me, his eyes narrowing as if trying to focus on a far off distance. "Katara!" he bellows, the expression on his face worried.

"Hi!" I say.

She replies with a shy smile, but says nothing.

"Hurry up!" the burly man shifts uncomfortably. "I don't think it's helping!"

There are concerned voices in the distance and I back away. Four women and a man approach the little girl. The man is leaning heavily on a walking stick and is supported by a large, burly woman. The little boy follows closely, disinterest in the little girl's condition evident in his features.

A woman dressed in faded green robes takes the little girl and cradles her in her arms. Sitting on the edge of the small pool, she swings her legs into the mud and wades into the center of the pool.

"How often have I told you not to run, Kaya," she chastises the young girl like a mother would a child as she scoops mud into her palm and rubs it onto the girl's chest.

Kaya squirms, protesting the muddying of her clothes. "I wasn't…running, Mama. Uncle Boulder was…my ostrich horse. He was carrying…me. We were playing. Iroh was pretending to be a Firebender and we were…running away from him."

A petite woman stands near them, her eyes a misty green. She snorts, covering her mouth, yet doing nothing to stifle her words. "He gets more like his father every day."

Kaya (I have come to find that that is the girl's name) grimaces as mud gets on her neck. Her breathing is even and steady. "Now I have to go around naked while my dress is washed!"

Her mother lifts her off her lap and sets her along the edge of the earthen edge of the spring. "I can dry your clothes and I am sure Aunt Toph can lift the dirt off."

Crossing her arms over her chest, Kaya frowns. "It isn't the same as washing them."

The mother wipes her muddy hands on her robes and sighs, calling upon the patience reserved for dealing with small children. "Then I guess you'll have to walk around naked while your dress dries."

"I lend you my shirt," the man who is leaning on the walking stick volunteers, his speech is slightly slurred.

Smiling, Kaya runs up to him and gently wraps her arm around one of his legs. "Thank you, Uncle Sokka."

As Kaya hugs her uncle's leg, her gaze meets mine. The scene is so warm and full of life. "You're not a Sandbender. How did you get through the desert?" she asks me directly.

"Kaya?" her mother looks perplexed and her Uncle Boulder shrugs his shoulders.

"She said she saw a boy earlier," the large man announces, his voice tinged with concern.

"You can see me?" I take a step toward her, but she tenses and hides her face.

The short woman tilts her head to the side as if listening for something. "I don't see anyone out there. Then of course, it all looks fuzzy to me."

"I'm lost," I plead with Kaya. "I was wondering if you could help me."

Turning her face from her uncle's tunic, Kaya eyes me warily. Her eyes are the color of ice. "I'm not supposed to talk to strangers."

A smile creeps past my lips. It is a wise lesson to learn. "You're right. I'm… Well, I actually don't know who I am."

"Kaya, who are you talking to," asks her mother, her long braids framing her face as she stoops and kneels next to her daughter.

Kaya lifts her arm and points directly at me. "That boy."

Her mother looks in the direction her daughter has pointed, but sees nothing. Her eyes are the same color as her daughter's. Although they are the color of ice, they look warm and inviting. "I see, and what does this boy look like?"

Kaya studies me for a moment, taking her mother's hand and holding it. "He doesn't have any hair. He has big ears. He has blue, pointy stripes on his head and hands. He's wearing orange and yellow clothes."

Her mother's warm smile collapses and a look of sad desolation takes its place. "Aang."

That one syllable word… I know it is my name. The gentle winds of fate have guided me to this oasis…to my past. Flashes of my life pass before me as memories rush me. The recall would probably hurt, but I have no body and no sensations.

Suddenly, things are more brilliant, shimmering in vivid colors around me. The hues of red and orange catch my attention and I look to the sky. It seems oppressive and wrong. I look at my hands and notice the vibrant blue arrows that adorn my skin. I look up at the people who are surrounding the four-year-old child who can see me.

Katara… Tears fall down her cheeks and she cries openly. Her hairstyle is the same as braids touch her sad face. She looks older and afraid.

Sokka looks so much older. His body is worn and battered -- by what I do not know.

Toph looks resilient as always, her fists closed by her sides in a familiar pose.

There are others there…some who seem familiar, but others I am sure I have never met.

One man stands apart. He stands in the distance, a look of malicious scorn etched into his cruel features. He wears a garb of bold red, mirroring the angry sky above. His topknot holds the imperial symbol of the Fire Nation. I feel the malevolence ebb from him.

Anger flashes through me as I stare into the eyes of the man who killed me – Fire Lord Ozai! My death was quick and efficient as the blue flames claimed my flesh in a flash of light. Clenching my fists to the side, I rush at him, ignoring the shrill protestations of Kaya.

We are intangible beings, incapable of harming one another, and I pass right through my mortal enemy. His laughter rankles my nerves as it mocks my attempts. His smile is malicious.

"Stop it!" Kaya shouts. "Leave my grandfather alone!"

Katara blanches, her normally dark skin turning ashen white. She scoops Kaya into her arms and runs into the dirt hut. Looking over her shoulder, her eyes skim the horizon in fear.

"Iroh! Come!" she calls to the little boy to follow her, and the others follow her with quizzical looks on their faces.

"The child is mine," hisses Ozai, circling me. "There is nothing you can do. You are as trapped in this realm as much as I. Only she can release us. Only she can restore the balance and my rightful place."

--

I lock the door once everyone is inside though I know it will do no good. Panic, my familiar and constant companion, has taken hold of me once again. A chill runs up and down my spine even though the temperature in the room is quite warm. The word "grandfather" echoes in my mind. If I have learned anything in the last five years, it is that Ozai is capable of anything.

"I'm sorry, Mama," Kaya sniffles as she hunches her shoulders and bows her head.

I stop pacing and look up. Everyone in the room is staring. I try to speak, but am unable.

"What is it, Katara?" Song's warm brown eyes hold a haunted expression.

She tries to hide the look in her eyes, but I see it before she succeeds. Feeling Kaya growing more agitated, I kneel before her and pull her into my arms. "It's okay, Kaya. I'm not angry with you."

My daughter clings to my neck, rubbing her tear-stained cheek against my face. "Why don't you go with Uncle Sokka and Aunt Toph and help them make dinner."

Sniffling, she follows them into the kitchen. Always shadowing his sister, Iroh follows her.

Song's gaze lingers on the door, as it swings closed behind the children. She knows something – something she is not telling me. The betrayal is sharp -- the sting over Kaya's words, still lingering in my mind.

I have not been whole for several years now, a part of me will always mourn Zuko, while the other part of me mourns for everybody else I have lost. Before the comet, there was a measure of control in my life. After the comet, my life fell apart. To be taken against one's will is like having a part of your soul removed. Though I know now that it was all a ruse, it was still difficult and painful. To be used in the manner I was is unforgivable. I was a brood mare, a vessel for the next Avatar.

My child! My daughter! I pray to my ancestors for the strength and wisdom to find the right path, for all this time I was sure my son was the one. I felt for sure that he was the Avatar. He has unknowingly demonstrated Firebending skills, whereas Kaya has demonstrated no particular talents other than mischief.

But I heard her. I heard her describe Aang as though he were standing right before her. A brief surge of hope thrummed through me. The Avatar is the bridge between this world and the next. Could it be possible that she really saw Aang? Or is it just her imagination? But to see Ozai? What madness have I descended into?

Yes, the Avatar is the bridge between this world and the Spirit World. Since when do the spirits travel to this world? The only spirits who linger are angry spirits – like Hei-Bai, the Forest Spirit. I want to believe the Spirit World is harmless, but I know better. Hei-Bai took Sokka and I was powerless to stop it.

"What's wrong, Katara?" she asks, avoiding my questioning glances. In the years we have lived together in exile, I have forgotten who this woman really is. She was handpicked by Mahari to see the Avatar born into this world. She is the voice of reason that always calms my worries when the burdens of motherhood weigh heavily upon me.

She is the seer's spy.

"I don't know," I reply, approaching the shorter woman. "Why don't you tell me what's wrong? I forgot who you really were, Song? I forgot you take your marching orders from Mahari?"

"Katara, you're being ridiculous," she counters, taking a step back.

"Am I?" I don't stop. I'll do anything to protect my children. "Do you speak with Mahari often? Does she visit you in dreams? Or does she send you news through the Sandbenders who deliver our supplies?"

"What are you talking about?" Tears are in her eyes.

I feel so manipulated, so betrayed. Clutching Song by the shoulders, I shake her. "I don't know! Tell me! What am I talking about? Kaya yelled something about her grandfather! She cries for her father at night! There's been no news – no news of Zuko for…" My voice clogs with emotion as I realize how long it's been. It's been five years since I last saw him. Three years since I dreamt of him.

Song shudders and sobs as I do. "You can't leave. She's safe here. The sand protects us."

"Tell me!" I shake her again, this time more forcefully.

Her shoulders are shaking. Her voice trembles. "I'm so sorry. I should have told you sooner. I didn't realize what she meant."

"Mahari?" I say the seer's name, bitterness filling my inflection.

"Yes," she whispers.

"What has happened?" The question seems too short to answer the questions I have.

"Ozai is dead. Zuko killed him." Tears stream down her cheeks. Crossing the room, she kneels next to her pallet on the floor. "I should have told you sooner, but I didn't know how."

I am wary as she turns around. I do not trust her. As she approaches me, I notice she is holding a worn piece of parchment.

"I haven't received any letters other than this," says Song, holding the paper out as though it is a rare treasure. "Things aren't as they should be."

Stamping down my fear and distrust, I take the letter and open it. The first thing that catches my attention is that the letter is dated almost three years ago.

_Dear Song,_

_I hope this letter finds you and all you are with in good health. Your mother and Damuk are well. There is still no word on your father. _

_We have done it! Fire Lord Ozai is dead and the Resistance has control of the Fire Nation capital. There are small pockets of radical elements that continue to support the dethroned fire lord, but we are dealing with them swiftly and without mercy._

_Rays of yellow sunshine peak through the burnt clouds of red. They are few and far between, but I believe that we shall restore the balance soon. I hope to feel the rays of the sun upon my skin once again before I enter into the next realm. _

_Ozai did not die easily. He very nearly succeeded in taking Zuko with him. It has been several months since we seized power. Zuko has yet to wake. I fear his spirit is too weak to work through the pain of the recovery he faces. I fear his essence will seek a final rest soon. _

_He was burned horribly. Damuk has done his best, but I fear that Zuko's injuries are beyond his skills as a Waterbending healer. _

_Please do not tell Katara of this news. It will only upset her. It is not yet safe for the Avatar to return. The sands of the desert are the best protection I can offer at this moment. Surely you realize the need for secrecy. Do your best to protect both children. They will serve their purpose in time. _

_Mahari_

The letter falls from my hands and flutters to the ground as if it has wings. A savage stupor devours me and I fall to my knees. I've been numb before, but never like this. The words are ominous. Iroh and Kaya's future has been set by this woman – the seer, the woman who had the resources to free us at any time, but saw fit not to. She wants my children. Of that I am sure.

Swallowing my flourishing hysteria, I clutch my forearms and begin to rock back and forth. Even with the threat to my children, only one question echoes in my mind….

Is Zuko alive?

--

TBC

A/N – I must beg for forgiveness for the lack of update on this story. I had my surgery. I have recovered. Thanks to all who offered warm wishes! They were greatly appreciated. During recovery, I had plenty of time to think about the direction of this story. I have set what I hope is a plausible course. Thanks to all who have reviewed. Reviews encourage the muse.

Tons of thanks goes out to Moncapitan for the constant pressure to make me go in directions I would otherwise be too lazy to go on my own.

Of course Zuko is alive. We know that, but Katara doesn't.


	23. Act III Chapter Two

Act III

Chapter Two –

**Warning! There is a rape scene in a dream sequence. Skip the italicized section if you are squeamish!**

Looking into the mirror, I stare at my reflection and hope for a glimmer of recognition. I know only what they have told me. I am Fire Lord Zuko, ruler of the Fire Nation and the direct descendant of Agni, ruler of a nation that is at war.

I touch the scars that crisscross my face, neck, and chest. There is no more pain. In fact, the nerves are dead. I feel nothing across the marked flesh. My thoughts linger on the older scar on the left side of my face. Jeong Jeong says I received that one from my father during an Agni Kai when I refused to fight.

I remember nothing of my past. Only my dreams hint to my past. I remember each and every one of them. They play in my mind over and over again as if to taunt me. I wake hard and aching, unable to face any of the concubines that remain in the palace. I shall never forget the look of revulsion on the woman's face as she approached my damaged body. Any passion I may have felt was quickly extinguished by her reaction.

Besides, she did not have blue eyes. The woman in my dreams has blue eyes and darker skin than mine. Her skin is soft to the touch – not that I would be able to feel much. The scars that cover my body have deadened the sensation of touch. I am a monster – inside and out.

The woman in my dreams begs me to leave her alone, but I press into her soft, yielding core as if I have every right to. The dream replays in my mind…

"_Please, no!" she entreats, grasping the chains that bind her wrists above her head. Her voice echoes against the bare walls of the dungeon cell. _

_I want to honor her request, but I cannot. There are movements in the shadows and I feel that my every breath is scrutinized. There is a man chained to the opposite wall. He is too bloodied and weak to protect the woman I am about to defile. _

_She wears the makeup like a Fire Nation concubine, but she isn't one of them. She was prepared, carefully cleaned and perfumed where she stood to make her more appealing to me. _

_My manhood is swollen with need. Even though she begs me to stop, I won't. I can't. I must honor my father's wishes. _

_Hissing, she spits at me and tries to kick me. _

_I pin her legs with mine. Metal strikes flesh and the man across the room cries out in pain. _

"_Sokka!" she cries, stilling against me._

_I can feel the rapid beat of her heart, as I bury my face against the flesh of her neck and shoulder. _

"_Finish this!" a voice hisses in the shadows. "Prove your loyalty to me."_

"_Yes, Father," I answer, unbuckling my belt and pushing the material of my pants out of the way. _

_The woman sobs as I angle my hips and nudge the dark triangle at the apex of her thighs. Biting her lip, she opens for me, even going so far as to lift one of her legs around me. _

_Smelling her feminine musk and feeling her wiry curls against my sex, I bite the inside of my cheek to keep from crying out. I don't know why, but it is imperative that my father not see how the woman before me affects me. _

_Burying my face against her neck, I grasp her buttocks and lift her, forcing my way into the hot haven of her body. _

I always wake at that point, shuddering with violent longings and fears. Maybe there is a reason I don't remember anything. Maybe I don't want to. I stare into the mirror, realization dawning in my imperfect expression. Perhaps I am the soulless monster my dreams allude to.

Averting my gaze, I pull my tunic on and cover the damage to my skin. Normally, servants would dress someone of my rank, but I cannot stand the looks they give me. Worse than looks of horror are looks of pity.

A gruff voice calls out from behind the door. "Are you properly attired, My Lord?"

I call for Jeong Jeong to enter, mentally preparing myself for his daily briefing.

The flap of my tent opens and the servants who help me put on my armor follow him in. My advisor is similar to me in so many ways. He has a scar. He was hunted as I was (or so I am told). He reminds me of someone…someone I cared for deeply.

"How are you feeling today, My Lord?" he asks, repeating the daily question not out of courtesy or caring, but out of necessity. He takes liberty and places his palm upon my forehead. "Did you have any feverish dreams last night?"

"No," I reply automatically, knowing better than to answer the question with any other answer. I do not have the time to have my dreams analyzed, nor do I have the time to pay attention to Mahari's enchanted ramblings. I wince as the servants cinch some of the buckles on my armor, but I look straight ahead.

Jeong Jeong steps away and stares at me with barely veiled discretion. He knows I am lying, for I am feverish even now.

Motioning for the servants to leave, I scowl at my reflection in the mirror. "Damuk has better things to do then attend my illness. There are wounded that need his attention," I state, referring to the Waterbending healer that saved my life.

The Firebending master snorts in disgust. "Agni preserve me! You are stubborn, just like Katar—"

"Like who?" My gaze snaps to his as the one syllable lingers on the cusp of my memory. "Who am I stubborn like?"

A harsh blush creeps up my advisor's neck. I have been lied to ever since I woke up, praying for death to take me. Clearing his throat, Jeong Jeong pins me with one of his penetrating gazes and does what he does best – clams up. "We have business, Fire Lord Zuko. Your father's supporters have gathered more troops and –"

"Katara?" I ask, refusing to be manipulated again.

He stiffens and I pursue him as he tries to walk away.

Speaking the name out loud liberates a memory. It isn't much, only a color – blue. I catch Jeong Jeong's armored sleeve. "Am I destined to roam this place as half a person for the sake of secrets?"

His gaze meets mine. It is a fleeting glance – one that shows me how conflicted the Firebending master is. "Am I being punished? Am I –"

"No!" he scoffs sullenly. "It is nothing –"

"Then what!" My anger is a veiled hiss and the embers in the fire pit glow a magnificent shade of blue. I am helpless. I cannot contain the power that ebbs and flows through my veins like a poisoned blessing.

Jeong Jeong's eyes widen. "Fire Lord Zuko, you must calm down. You must –"

The litany of his words incenses me further. I know I must do as he says, for the power of the comet is like an opiate, empty yet fulfilling, and highly addictive. My strength as a Firebender has increased beyond anyone's wildest imaginings, including my own. My bending has always been substandard at best. Now it is something else.

The preternatural force became too much for me in my weakened condition upon first waking. The palace was destroyed, the last victim to the final storm of fire rain as I lingered in fever and pain.

I can't control the comet. I can touch it and study it, but it does not respond to any of my commands. Why should it? It is of the heavens. I am a mere mortal. I may be a direct descendant of Agni, as the title of Fire Lord suggests, but I am only a man – a flawed one at that.

"Your health," Jeong Jeong reminds me, giving me the reason Mahari has given me since I woke up. "You will remember in time. Your health is still fragile."

"Do not patronize me," I growl impatiently, grasping his sleeve with more force. "Tell me what I want to know!"

Lowering his gaze, his voice is barely a whisper. "She is the…mother of your children."

I flinch, stumbling backward as his words pierce my soul. Children… I have children. Why has this information been kept from me? I close my eyes and fall to my knees. The blue color of a virgin spring tickles my memories. I stare into the calm water, wanting to quench my thirst, but not wanting to disturb the tranquility.

The vision turns, playing on my nightmares and pain. I look down and see that the water is tainted with blood. The face of the woman in my dreams floats upon the surface.

"Oh Agni! No!" I groan softly.

"Zuko," Jeong Jeong tries to offer comfort.

"I raped her." Anguished tears stream down my cheeks. "I raped the mother of my children, didn't I?"

"There were other forces at play," he says quickly, trying to assuage my mounting guilt. "Mahari is just as much to blame as your father."

No matter how hard I try, I cannot recall the actual event. I can only recall the nightmare; the nightmare I know now is based in the reality of my past. "Children?"

Jeong Jeong looks away, failing to hide his reluctance.

"Never mind," I say quickly, quelling the impulse to cover his mouth with my hand. "Tell me nothing of them. I am obviously the monster my dreams reveal me to be. They are hidden from me for a reason and shall remain that way."

--

TBC

AN – I really wanted to edit the rape scene out of the story. I hate rape. I do not condone it. But I felt that the details that were rendered above were necessary to the character development of Zuko. And, in the immortal words of Forrest Gump… "That's all I got ta say about that."

On the other hand, I must pause here and poke fun at the fact that Zuko has amnesia. It's the oldest trick in the book. The soap opera wouldn't be complete unless somebody had amnesia. (Insert maniacal laughter here. Exit stage left.)

Thanks for the reviews! They are greatly appreciated.

--


	24. Act III Chapter Three

Act III

Chapter Three

--

I can almost taste the water whore's fear as she whispers to the stocky Earthbender. She looks over her shoulder, tossing her long, dark braids out of the way. As much as I wish it, I cannot harm any of them. I am no longer Fire Lord. I no longer possess the power of the comet. I am a drifting soul, my divinity having been stripped away by my bastard son. My quest toward immortality is nearing its end. My ambition, just like my memories, wanes with the passage of time.

I stare at the petulant child who faces the corner for her punishment. I know not what she did, and I really don't care. That weak, pathetic child is my only hope. Though she looks just like her mother, Kaya reminds me of her father. She is soft and needy, constantly seeking affection from those around her. She is sickly, just like Zuko was when he was born. I had hoped that she would have been more like my beloved Azula, but her mother coddles her just like Ursa coddled Zuko.

But it is this child who will restore me to my former glory. She is the bridge I shall cross between the damned and the living. For now, I must play to her youthful sensibilities.

Her brother, on the other hand, reminds me of myself. He has a solid build and is already showing elemental potential. With proper training, he could be a great Firebender. Perhaps I was hasty in my dismissal of his existence. He could prove to be a useful tool in the manipulation of his sister.

"Promise me, Toph," the Waterbender whispers, hastily wiping tears away. "Promise me that you will take care of them."

I approach the women and listen to the conversation, my curiosity aroused. They cannot see me.

The one called Toph chooses her words carefully, apparently a feat that is taxing for the Earthbender. "I can't, Katara," she hisses. "Zuko made me promise to take care of you. I can't do that if you leave."

The water witch's spine stiffens. "Is it a promise you made to Zuko or to Mahari?"

The petite woman's fists clench at her sides as she holds her temper. "I'll pretend that you just didn't question my loyalty, Sugar Queen. Zuko told me to take you away and protect you. He told me to never leave you. I may not have sworn an oath, but I've kept my promise."

The Waterbender embraces the Earthbender and mumbles something I do not hear. The shorter of the two closes her misty green eyes as tears spill down her cheeks.

"And that's why I have to do this, Toph," Katara sighs. "I have to find him. I have to help him."

"How do you know he's even alive?" asks Toph.

Grinning, I move closer. I am eager to hear news of my son's descent into madness. Sozin's comet clouded my judgment and abilities. I am interested in hearing how they have affected Zuko. I doubt he's dead. If he were dead, surely his spirit would have sought out his lover and children by now.

"I don't," Katara replies. "That's why I've got to find him."

"Iroh and Kaya –" Toph whispers pleadingly, seemingly unwilling to accept the mantle of responsibility.

"Must stay here," the Waterbender affirms, her voice quivering with doubt and fear. "They are safe here. Kaya needs the mud in the glacial spring. You know how to treat her. I trust you."

"I don't have healing abilities," Toph reminds Katara. "What if she has an attack and the mud isn't enough?"

Katara pauses, her eyes wide and moist with tears. "I trust you…"

--

Closing my eyes, I shudder as the sand glider speeds across the desert. Tears fall freely, but the Sandbenders do not see. They don't know that I have stowed away beneath the heavy tarp that once covered the supplies to our desert oasis.

Leaving my children was a difficult decision to make. My heart is like a heavy stone and I cannot listen to the voice inside my head that condemns me for abandoning them. Instead, I listen to the voice that murmurs Zuko's name over and over again. I must find him. I can no longer stay in the desert and wait for my children to "serve their purpose" when Mahari sees fit. They are too young to trifle with now and should be safe. I take these actions to secure their futures.

I have not left them defenseless. Toph is with them. She has vowed to protect them and Sokka. It was not an easy promise to extract, for she had promised Zuko that she would protect me. I have left them in the safest place imaginable. In that respect, I am grateful to Mahari for providing the impenetrable desert home Iroh and Kaya have known these four years.

I am not even certain that I will make it through the desert alive, but I must try. Kaya and Iroh's fate is tied to Zuko's. Of that, I am sure. Shifting beneath the tarp, I try to ease the ache in my cramped muscles.

The glider slows down and comes to a halt. I hear muffled voices. Before I know it, the heat of the sun beats down upon me, seemingly spotlighting my stowaway status.

"See, Shiloh!" one Sandbender says to the other through the material that covers his mouth. "I told you the tarp moved."

The one who I assume is Shiloh uncovers his mouth and whips his glasses off. "The wind was whipping all around us, Kato. How could you tell she was under there?"

"Ah, man!" Kato cries as he watches me crawl off the sandglider and straighten my clothes. "Dad's going to kill us."

"Never mind, Dad," the older brother retorts. "What about Mahari? She'll go ballistic when she finds out the Avatar's mom has flown the coup. We need to take her back."

Having had enough of their debate, I spring into action. With a long, sweeping movement of my arm, I call the water from my bag and prepare to defend myself.

Shiloh, who is tall and lanky, stares at me in disbelief. "You have got to be kidding me. Look around you, Waterbender. You're out of your element."

"I made it across this desert once," I reply, waving my water whip around menacingly. "I can do it again."

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!" Kato shouts, placing himself between us.

Eyeing the younger brother suspiciously, I return the water to my pouch, but leave the cork out in case I need to defend myself.

"Where are you trying to go, anyway?" he asks softly.

"The Fire Nation." I don't take my eyes off Shiloh, for his stance is still threatening to me, whereas Kato's posture is conciliatory.

"Why?" Shiloh questions as the wind whips sand around us.

"I need to find Prince Zuko," I reply, my words catching on the wind as if the element is sabotaging my efforts to communicate. I can feel drops of water escape my container as nature claims the moisture. The amount is tiny, but it is enough to capture my attention and worry me. I may be able to pull water from the sand, but I'll lose it to the air.

"You mean Fire Lord Zuko?" Kato shoves the toe of one of this boots into the sand.

I nod. The heat of the day is sweltering and it takes my breath away.

"You can't go to the Fire Nation," the older brother announces, his tone one of final authority. "There isn't much left of it and the Fire Lord is mad. No one ventures there and lives."

"Why not?" I snap, undeterred by his speech. The brothers look at me as though I am crazy. Sometimes I wonder if I am.

Kato is the first to speak. "I don't know all the details, but there isn't much left. The outer islands were destroyed, claimed by the waves of water. The costal regions also gave way to the ocean. What the water didn't take, the fire rain destroyed.

"Apparently, the prince killed his father and went mad with grief. They say he's horribly scarred and deformed. I guess his father fought to the end, huh?"

"Take me to him," I demand, refusing to believe what he was telling me.

Shiloh scoffs. "My, my! Aren't you a bossy one?"

Desperation seizes me and rational thoughts abandon me. I whip the water out of the leather pouch and snap it toward them. The water dissolves as wind and sand blocks its path. As if it is a living, breathing thing, sand crawls up my legs, encasing me. It burns my eyes and skin. The battle is lost before it even began. The weight of the sand as it encompasses me is oppressive. My hands are trapped in front of me and only my head remains uncovered.

Kato looks worried.

"What did you do that for, sandass!" he chastises Shiloh. "Now we're going to have to dig her out and take her back to the oasis."

I fight against the sand, loosening bits and pieces. "You can take me back, but I'll only leave the oasis again. I'm not a prisoner. Neither are my children!"

With a broad downward sweep of his arm, Shiloh bends the sand and releases me. The move is so sudden that I fall forward onto my hands and knees.

"You're right," he states simply. "You're not a prisoner."

"She's not?" Kato asks, clearly baffled over his brother's change in tactics.

"We're charged with protecting the Avatar," he explains, climbing onto the sandglider. "She isn't the Avatar. If she wants to commit suicide by wandering through the desert, that's her business."

It's a struggle, but I manage to stand up.

Shifting something around on the glider, Shiloh pulls out a pouch of water and a knapsack and tosses it at my feet. He points toward the west. "It's a three-day hike to the nearest town. If you make it there… Well, have fun swimming to the Fire Nation. No one will take you there."

Looking in the direction he has pointed, I shudder. The sun is already setting, shades of darkness already covering the land.

"You're just going to leave her?" Kato sputters.

"Why not?" his brother answers with a casual shrug. "No one will know if she dies out here. If she makes it, then she's out of our hair. Either way, we can profit off the supplies that are sent for her."

Kato accepts his brother's explanation and climbs onto the glider. I can tell by the expression on his face that he is hesitant.

"Just remember," Kato says, his voice rising as the whine of air and sand fills the sail. "Travel at night and sleep during the day."

Shiloh pushes the glider to the north, leaving me to my own devices.

Kneeling, I pick up my empty water bag and focus on the splotches of dark sand that hold water. I bend what water I can from the sand and gather the supplies they left for me. I have one and a half bags of water and what appears to be a small tent in the knapsack.

The sun is setting. I feel tired and I want to rest, but Kato's advice echoes in my head. I need to start walking. I stare at the vastness of the Si Wong Desert. The yellow sands are cast in shades of burnt orange and blood, the effects of the comet.

My memories play tricks on me as I hear Aang's laughter on the wind. Sokka, had he retained his wit and sarcasm, would undoubtedly find the state of things fascinating in his usual sarcastic manner. My brother would probably seek the nearest cactus and make nice with the juice. Sokka never did care for the heat of the desert.

Those times seem so long ago. Shaking my head, I focus my thoughts and continue my long trek across the desert.

--

TBC

Author's Notes – I obviously can't thank Moncapitan enough for his constant prodding and encouragement. When I start writing, I never know where I'm going. It drives him crazy and he really does guide the process with his suggestions and harassment (wink, wink).

I must also thank everybody who leaves reviews for anything I write. (As some of you know, I do have other Avatar stories. I also write in other fandoms. I also have an original story in the works.) Between the eight fan fictions, my original story, motherhood, work, and life, I update whenever possible. I beg forgiveness for the lack of updates on this story. When it came time to work on it, I came down with a horrible case of writer's block. I know where I want to go with the story, but there are times where I don't know how to get there. Anyway, I hope everybody enjoys the latest chapter. As you can see, I am working on getting Zuko and Katara back together.


	25. Act III Chapter Four

Act III

Chapter Four –

The steam and smoke from the battle swirl around me, obscuring my view of the carnage that surrounds me. The cloud is crimson, carrying the stench of death and another piece of my soul toward the sky. My broadswords drip with the blood of my enemies, the religious zealots who believe that my father will return to honor his roll in the grand scheme of their madness. Cries of mercy echo in the distance as my forces drive them back. I ignore them.

I don't know what I'm fighting for anymore. My nation? My honor?

My nation is a shadow of its former glory, or so I am told. The outer islands were lost to the sea. Thankfully, they were mostly uninhabited. The coastal villages were also flooded. The waters have yet to recede. It's unlikely they ever will.

The fire rain did most of the damage. The land is pockmarked and desolate. The ones who survived the initial event took refuge underground. None of them have returned.

Why would they?

The land is dead, a morbid reflection of the battles that are continually waged here. The Sect of Kroni is relentless, determined to bring the malevolent deity into this world. The cult is one of the oldest in existence, predating our benevolent Agni. Whereas Agni is the spark of life, Kroni is the destroyer.

The legend of Kroni was lost until Sozin uncovered it and resurrected the sect. My ancestor became obsessed with the scroll -- the promise of godhood too much for him to resist. For whoever unleashes Kroni upon this world will be granted eternal life and dominion over all.

That is what my father aspired to. Now the cult is without its leader and it is vengeance they seek. Without the line of Agni and the Avatar to wield the power of the comet, Kroni cannot cross the threshold between the spirit world and this one.

Since the Avatar is dead there is no way for the sect to gain what they seek. Unfortunately, they are like a plague on the land, their fervor unmatched by even Mahari's belief in my destiny.

The Earth Kingdom woman, who dresses like an Air Nomad, perplexes me. She speaks of my destiny, manipulating it to suit her own needs. She encourages me to use the power of the comet to rid my land of the vermin that infest it, but I won't. The land is the way it is because of that power. I won't wrought more destruction upon the brave souls who have remained behind to try to make a life here. This place is the way it is because I was too weak it to control the power of Sozin's comet.

I am stronger now.

The power of my ancestor's comet seduces me like a long-lost lover, constantly whispering in my mind.

_I belong to you, Zuko. I will give you what you most desire. Wield the power and use me. We belong together._ Those words are a constant, lulling song in my mind. They wake me in the middle of the night, chasing my dreams away with uncertainty and anguish.

For that I am thankful because my dreams are a bitter reminder that I have no honor left. The woman with the sad blue eyes haunts me whenever I close my eyes. Katara. Her name is like a soothing prayer; one I know that I don't even deserve to whisper.

She is the mother of my children, according to Jeong Jeong. I don't know their names. I know nothing of their birth. I don't even know what sex they are.

But they are the reason I fight. I fight to protect them. I fight to rid this world of the evil that would see harm to them. Unfortunately, I am not the last descendant of Agni. They are. Mahari assures me they are well protected, but I don't trust her. I doubt I ever will.

The brief respite of the battle is over and I hear the telltale sounds of a firefight and the clash of metal in the distance. I feel nothing except the renewed rush of adrenaline as I run toward the fight. Heat assails me and I can see flashes of fire through the haze as the combatants fight.

I hear Jeong Jeong's familiar growl as he bends an arc of flames toward numerous adversaries. I am too far away. He is surrounded and the plateau is eerily devoid of the blood-red cloud. I can see everything, including a lone archer targeting my friend.

"No!" I cry out, watching as my advisor turns to defend me. Instead he turns into the deadly path of the arrow. It pierces him in the chest, just above his heart, surely a mortal wound.

Incensed, I block an arrow with my broadswords and fight my way through the enemy. I am surprised the blood on my swords has not dulled their deadly accuracy.

Jeong Jeong has fallen.

He is grabbed by his collar and slapped. "Where did she hide the Avatar!"

Defending myself, I cut down my opponent and battle my way toward Jeong Jeong. His mouth gapes as though he's trying to speak, but blood dribbles down his chin.

"Where did Mahari hide the Avatar!"

Past the scene of interrogation, I see reinforcements. The sage holding my advisor spits on him and throws him to the ground. "Capture the Fire Lord!" he commands.

I am submerged in total chaos, swinging my swords and blocking all strikes against me. The heat of the attacks from multiple Firebenders warms me. Their power is now mine as I absorb the element with which they seek to subdue me with. It crawls beyond my soul, beckoning to the power of the comet. The surge is a fraction of what the comet is actually capable of.

Hearing inhumane screams, I open my eyes and watch as my enemies burst into flames. I hear the comet's voice signing to me, congratulating me on the death of my enemies. The power is terrifying, yet beautiful.

The charred bodies writhe and moan. Their deaths are slow and agonizing.

Insatiable, the power coursing through me calls for more blood.

"No!" I hiss shakily, climbing my way toward Jeong Jeong.

Like a scorned lover, the voice hisses its outrage and withdraws, the promise of later hanging thick in the air. I sway on my feet, wanting to embrace that which the comet offers me.

"Over here!" a soldier calls, rescuing me from the drunken stupor.

A group of men run up to their fallen comrades. I see the familiar blue tunic of Damuk as he rushes about and triages the wounded. His crystalline blue eyes assess me from the distance and I can see his shrewd gaze as he determines that I am fine. He kneels next to Jeong Jeong and sets about healing the wound just over his heart. The Waterbender motions to me for help.

I hurry over, dropping to my knees and gathering Jeong Jeong in my arms. His armor is soaked with blood, his eyes glazed with pain.

Staring at Damuk, I see the hopelessness in his gaze. "Is there anything –"

"Pray," he replies quickly as he continues assessing the closest person I have to a friend.

Wheezing, Jeong Jeong snatches my sleeve and pulls me to him. "The desert…"

"Stay still," I encourage him sternly.

"She's in the Si Wong Desert," he rasps, whimpering as Damuk thrusts the arrow through his upper torso to free him of it.

I shake my head, wincing as I watch the healer work quickly. He clips the tail off and pulls the shaft clean through his back.

Jeong Jeong screams in pain.

"It was close," Damuk states, summoning water from a pouch and touching it to his chest and back. "Another inch lower and it would have been fatal."

Jeong Jeong's grasp on my sleeve tightens. "She's in the desert," he breathes.

Seeing that he won't rest easy until he tells me what he wants to tell me, I lean closer. "Who?"

"Your daughter… She's…the Avatar." The whispered words send a chill up my spine, even though the fires around me would stifle such a sensation.

Jeong Jeong closes his eyes and succumbs to his pain. Damuk gives me a nervous look as he heals my second-in-command.

Gently setting him down, I stand and look at the Waterbender. It is time to seek the answers from which I have hidden.

--

TBC

A/N – Any mistakes are my own. My beta reader didn't get a chance to read it over because I was impatient to post. Thanks to all who have reviewed. Reviews fan the flames of creativity (wink wink).


	26. Act III Chapter Five

Act III

Chapter Five

Author's Note – The response to this story has been tremendous. I cannot thank all the reviewers enough. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Here's another short chapter. I'm happy to report that the muse for this story is going strong. (Crosses fingers and prayers that she doesn't have another case of writer's block.) This chapter, unlike the others, never went to Moncapitan. So any mistakes are my own. If you see something that is horribly misspelled or grammatically incorrect, please point it out. I strive for accuracy, but I write late at night when I'm half asleep sometimes.

I have received some reviews that are concerned that Katara and Zuko are going to miss one another. Let me take this time to assure you that this is not what I am planning. They will be reunited within the next two to three chapters. As always, enjoy this chapter. It's got lots of juicy tidbits of plot in it.

--

Azula walks beside me. She is sullen and quiet. My niece feels her death to be a betrayal of everything she believed in while she was alive. Her trust and love in her father was unconditional. She wasn't as evil or as crazy as I had supposed. She was only Ozai's daughter.

I haven't the heart to tell her my suspicions, but I know that she feels it too. Why else would she journey with me into the desert? Appa and Momo walk beside us, their purpose on our journey baffling me even more.

"How did you die?" she asks quietly, shuffling her feet in the sand.

Looking up to the burnt orange clouds overhead, I contemplate my answer, careful not to slander her father. Though she resents her death and suspects her father's hand in it, she is not ready to hear the truth.

I know the truth. I know what Ozai is trying to do. My father taught me the shameful secrets of the sect. Kroni the Destroyer cannot be allowed to cross the bridge between the spirit world and the physical.

Many people think that it was Sozin's ambition that started the war. It wasn't. It was the secret Sect of Kroni. It was their ambition that poisoned my ancestor's mind and led our nation down the path of war.

"I died peacefully in my sleep," I lie.

Stopping, she crosses her arms over her chest and arches a graceful eyebrow. "Do you not think me worthy of the truth, Uncle?"

Much as she was in life, Azula is too astute for me to trick. I stare at the horizon, unable to meet her gaze. "Old habits die hard. Like Zuko, I seek only to protect you."

She scoffs. "Oh really, so those fireballs you threw at my head where tokens of your affection?"

"Think of them as much needed training," I retort jokingly, refusing to take the bait. She is spoiling for an argument and I will not be the one to give it to her.

"Training?" She gives me an incredulous look. "Like I needed training!"

I chuckle, trying to lead her line of questioning astray. What can I say? Old habits die hard.

"Tell me the truth," she insists, the look in her eyes so sad that it makes me want to embrace her. But, I can't. Neither one of us has substance. We are shades of our former selves, trapped souls destined to roam our old world.

Drawing a shuddering breath, I bow my head and try to pluck up the courage to tell my niece what she wants to know. "Are you certain? What I have to say does not cast your father in a flattering light."

"Please," she says softly.

"Very well," I capitulate, wishing I had a place to sit and a nice cup of jasmine tea. We continue walking as I gather my thoughts and try to ease the burden of the information I am about to depart.

"If the legend is correct, I, Appa, and Momo were all victims of the fire rain of Sozin's comet. As spring started to warm into summer, I was sleeping outside next to the Avatar's bison. Unlike the rest of the traveling party, I didn't mind being too warm. When you get to be my age, warm weather is your friend. I woke up in time to see the fire rain. Before I realize what it was, a flash of fire had engulfed me and I was here.

"Somehow your father summoned the comet early. I'm not exactly sure how he did that, but I think he had help from the Sect of Kroni."

"Sect of Kroni?" she asks as she walks next to me.

I shudder even though I cannot feel the heat of the sun as it warms the desert sand. Her lack of knowledge gives me hope. Ozai was mad, but it is oddly comforting that he had not chosen Azula to be the bride of the destroyer. It leaves me to wonder who my brother had chosen for such a daunting task.

"The Sect of Kroni is a religious cult that laid the foundation for the Sages of Agni. They were outlawed long ago, most of the followers executed for their refusal to renounce Kroni's lust for power. Legend says that Agni trapped Kroni in the spirit world to protect our nation.

"When he was a boy, Sozin found the scrolls of Kroni. He became obsessed with them, for they promised great power and dominion over this world and the spirit world. He is the one who harnessed the passing power of the comet and started the war. Even now, I doubt the other nations realize why our nation attacked.

"Sozin told my father all the secrets of the scrolls, grooming him to carry out his work. My father passed the secrets to me. Azulon gave the scrolls to me to destroy. He thought Sozin to be insane and he lacked the conviction to carry out his father's ambition."

I shake my head in remembrance. "But the Fire Nation was already embroiled in a bitter war. Nothing could excuse the genocide of the Air Nomads or the massacre at the South Pole.

"I took the scrolls and never destroyed them. I was lackadaisical in my duty and lost them. My spirit is heavy with shame. If I had only done what was asked of me…"

"I still don't understand, Uncle," Azula questions me, her inflection that of a curious student. "How did the Sect of Kroni help my father call the comet early? What happened to the scrolls? I saw the fire rain. I took refuge under ground. Then I fell ill with fever and I never recovered."

"Your father stole the scrolls," I continue. "He came to me one day and confronted me with them. I'll never forget the look in his eyes. It was the same look that I often saw in my grandfather's eyes. It was the lust for power. We fought. I demanded the scrolls back, but he wouldn't give them to me. Then I reminded him that it would be me on the throne of Agni and not him. I told him that I had no intention of summoning the power of the comet, and that I would use the passing of the celestial harbinger to usher in a new era – one of peace and restitution.

"Ozai spat in my face and told me that I was a traitor to our nation. He said that he would take the throne from me." I sigh, trying to shake the melancholy of that day away.

"I don't know how the Sect of Kroni helped your father. There are forces other than elemental ones in the world." I point to the burnt orange clouds in the sky that block our path to the spirit world. "As for your fever, I can only guess at what happened."

She nods for me to continue.

"When Ozai called upon the power of Sozin's comet, it consumed him…not in the literal sense…but the metaphysical sense. Only a descendant of Agni or the Avatar could call the comet down from the heavens. When he consumed the power, the power consumed him and all of his bloodline. I suspect your brother fell ill with fever as well."

"Then where is he?" Azula snaps bitterly as she scans the horizon.

"We were traveling with a Waterbender with tremendous healing abilities. She probably healed him," I huff as we climb a steep dune and see the oasis in the distance.

My niece chuckles mirthlessly. "I wish I'd had a Waterbender."

--

TBC


	27. Act III Chapter Six

Act III

Chapter Six

--

The two brothers were right. No one sails across the ocean anymore. Neglected ships and boats are moored to the docks like relics of a long forgotten era. Some are sunken, while others are barely seaworthy. The village is oddly quiet, with exception of a seaside tavern where lively music is playing.

The door is open, and I walk up the steps. The light from the frivolity touches my skin as I walk though the door. But I get no farther, the press of cold steel against my neck frightening me.

"Identify yourself," a brusque voice commands.

The sounds of drink and music have been replaced by a deadly silence. I am afraid, too weak and tired to defend myself. The tavern is filled with serving girls and soldiers.

"Katara," I reply, my voice hoarse. "Katara of the Southern Water Tribe."

"How do we know your not a spy for the Sect?" the voice questions, the blade digging into my neck.

"Step aside, Xin Fu," a heavily accented voice chastises from across the room as a small dark-skinned man limps toward me.

Xin Fu's blade retreats and I am shoved forward. Weak and dehydrated from my travels, I fall to my knees.

"She is not our enemy," the dark-skinned man says as he touches my hair. "She is an old soul, one that is forever connected to the Avatar."

A fearful alarm rushes through me.

"Fear not, Katara of the Southern Water Tribe." His tone is gentle as he coaxes me to look at him. His eyes are warm and dark; as if they hold a grave secret. His white hair speaks of age and knowledge. I feel like I should know him, but I can summon no reason. Even though the ocean is outside, the air inside the tavern is hot and dry. I haven't the strength to defend myself. After what seems like an eternity, the man pulls away and offers his arm in assistance.

"Bring water and food," he instructs the serving girls as he helps me to a nearby chair. "My apologies for the rude welcome, Katara. The Sect of Kroni seeks to supplant the peaceful ways of our meager lives. While war wages across the sea, we must guard against those who wish to bring the conflict to us."

Water is placed before me. I choke as I gulp it. I am afraid this is a dream. I am afraid this is a ruse. Over the years I have learned to trust no one but myself.

"Slow down, child." The old man regards me with a look of benevolence. "There is plenty to eat and drink."

As if proving his point, a platter of bread, cheese, fruits, and meat are placed before me. My first inclination is to feed Iroh and Kaya, but they are not here to witness the bounty before me. I swallow my tears over the injustice. If only I could have brought them with me. But they had to stay in the desert. It is safe there.

I start with the meat, taking a huge bite out of the shank. The spices are delicious. It is different from what I am used to. I feel the stares of the people in the room. Some are curious while others are distrustful.

The man continues studying me. It is as though he is studying something much deeper than my mannerisms and desperation. He is old, older than I have ever seen. His brown skin is lined with age – an age that is timeless.

"You were right to come out of the desert," he states softly, paying no mind to those around him. "Your children are well protected and shall remain that way until destiny wills it otherwise."

Choking down a large bite of bread, my heart pounds, and I try to remain calm.

"I am a Seer, much like Mahari, but not so much like Mahari," he continues, oblivious of my desire to kill him. "Whereas she actively shapes the future. I study it. She was wrong to allow harm to come to you. For that, I ask a most humble forgiveness for the actions of my daughter."

"Mahari is your daughter," I sputter in disbelief.

"Yes." He nods. "Even now she tries to guide the events as they unravel. I fear that her meddling will undo the delicate threads as they unwind around us."

"Then why don't you stop her," I suggest, hoping for an ally in my struggles.

Reaching across the table and patting my hand, he chuckles. "Tell me something, young one. Do your children always do as they are told?"

There is something about the man that puts me at ease and I smile. I cannot help but laugh, remembering the many times that Iroh and Kaya cause mischief. "You have a point."

The warriors around us call to the servants to provide them with more drink. The call is like a ripple through the room as the musicians start to play and people start to mill about.

I continue eating, filling my stomach for the long journey ahead. It has been some time since I last ate this well.

"My name is Pathik." He leans back in his chair and watches me. "You must not be too harsh on my daughter. Her intentions are noble. She lost everything when the comet returned – her husband…her children…"

His voice grows thick with emotion as he mentions the loss of his grandchildren. I cannot help but reach out to this man. I cover his hand with mine. It is a small comfort but it is all I can offer. "I'm sorry."

Pathik shakes his head as if ridding himself of the memories. "Thank you, young Waterbender."

I smile, unable to remember the last time I actually felt young. There are times I feel like I am trying to command the ice flows of my youth. No matter how hard I tried, I could never direct the currents.

Taking advantage of the silence between us, I finish my drink.

"Yes, yes," he says, patting my hand. "Finish up. I'll have Lin pack more food for you. You have a long journey ahead of you. I'll have one of the men prepare a ship for you, but I'm afraid you'll have to make the trip alone. I cannot spare any of them from their patrols. The sect members are relentless. They try to wage war on this soil, but we are steadfast and vigilant.

"We know what secret lies in the desert. We will protect Kaya and Iroh with our dying breaths." Taking what looks like a bolt of material from his satchel, Pathik hands it to me. "Fly this flag as you near the shores on your return journey. It will allow us to recognize friend from foe."

Staring at the strange material, I find myself lost in its beauty. I have never seen such material before. It shimmers as the surrounding candlelight hits it. It is like silver water.

"The war is lost along the island chain of a once great nation. Gather as many as you can and retreat to our shores." Pathik gathers my hands in his, his pleading gaze imploring me to carry on. "Tell my daughter that this is what happens when one tries to shape fate. She cannot will her desire upon the future.

"Bring the Fire Lord back." The seer pauses, as if choosing his words carefully. "Though your daughter is the Avatar, she does not have the strength to rid us of the comet."

Conflict wages within me. This man speaks of things that have yet to pass. He talks about my daughter's fate as if it is written on some long-forgotten scroll. How can I trust him? His daughter used me. She wants to use Kaya too.

"I sense your distrust and anxiety, Katara of the Southern Water Tribe." Pathik holds onto my hands even as I try to pull them away. "Our destinies are intertwined. I know you seek only to protect your children. I beg of you to swim freely in the tides of fate. You must allow your children to fulfill their destinies."

"They are my children," I hiss, jerking out of his grasp. "What do you expect me to do?"

"I expect you to guide them, of course," he replies solemnly. "When Kaya unleashes her true potential, you must step aside. You must allow her to do what is necessary."

I cannot stop the tears as they roll down my cheeks, for I know that he is right. There is laughter in the background, music that enhances the spirit of merriment. Life is almost normal here. No one is aware that my heart is breaking.

--

TBC

Author's Notes – I'm lazy. I was working on Price of Peace. I promise to never write fan fiction again unless it is finished and I can post it on a regular basis. I cannot apologize enough for the delay on this chapter. The nasty upper respiratory bug swept through my home with a vengeance. Of course, I caught it! Life wouldn't be complete without a bought of the creepin' crude!

As always, I must thank all who have reviewed. I must also thank Moncapitan for pointing out the plot holes. Thanks!


	28. Act III Chapter Seven

Act III

Chapter Seven

--

Staring into the fire, I wait. I do not need the reports from the sentries. I know Zuko's army is close by. I had wondered how long it would take the Fire Lord to seek my council. His distrust of me has kept him away far too long. I have much I must atone for – sins that only he can forgive.

My father warned me. He warned me about interfering with the threads of fate. Though I had no part in the beginning, I certainly played my part near this end.

"Mahari," a brusque voice calls me by a name I hardly recognize anymore. "The Fire Lord and his… troops have cleared the pass. He sent a herald ahead. He wishes to speak with you as soon as the wounded are attended."

"How many?" I ask, needing to confirm the visions that have haunted me.

"Less than twenty," my sentry replies.

Bowing my head, I pray for the lost souls of the fallen. Add my twelve men to his… Katara will be able to see them safely across the water. The battle for this nation is lost. The Sect of Kroni has multiplied like locusts over fertile crops, devouring this land. We must retreat if we are to see another day.

The evacuations are almost complete. The underground river to Ba Sing Se has carried all the civilians away. I must see to the men and women who remained behind. I must make sure that the underground river and tunnels are sealed.

"Mahari?" The sentry is waiting for my reply.

I snap out of my reverie. "Please bring the Fire Lord to me posthaste."

"That won't be necessary," a gravely voice announces from the entrance of my tent. Zuko is taller than I remember, the breadth of his shoulders enhanced by the royal armor of the Fire Nation. I fall to my knees in reverence, kowtowing before him.

--

Eyeing Mahari suspiciously, I enter her tent. She has never bowed to me before. I remove my helmet and wait for her to stand. I clench my fists, the urge to harm the witch overwhelming. She has kept so much from me. I doubt I shall ever know the entire truth.

"My lord," she says, continuing to bow before me.

"Get up." I bury my thoughts and feelings deep, though I hear the siren's song of the comet. I feel as though I am on the edge of a great precipice. If I close my eyes and jump, I shall fall for all eternity. If blame is to be assigned, I must assign it to the woman before me. I want to hurt her. I want to see her bleed. I despise every breath she takes, my distrust of her tainting the very roots of my existence. "Jeong Jeong has been injured. The battle is lost."

A malicious grin spreads across my face as I watch the closely veiled pain flit across her exotic features. I have always suspected that she harbors feelings for my general. Now my suspicion has been confirmed.

"Will he live?" she asks, her voice shaken and soft.

"Damuk seems to think so," I answer quickly, unable to take pleasure in someone else's pain, no matter how much I want to.

Silent tears fall. The anguish and her age show in her eyes. "All is lost, Zuko. We must abandon this land and retreat to the Earth Kingdom."

Bitter laughter erupts from me, the irony of her words biting into the remnants of my soul. For once, she speaks the truth – a truth I do not wish to hear. I am not willing to abandon my nation. It is where I was born and where I will die. This is my destiny.

"You must take who is left and retreat through the underground rivers. If you go over the ocean, you will be attacked," I instruct her. "I will stay behind."

"No!" she protests, moving to touch me, but quickly withdrawing her hand as if I had burned her. "That is suicide. I will stay behind. I know the network of the true caverns – the ones that were carved by the gods. You must go on! You have so much to do! Kaya and Iroh need your guidance."

I feel the blood drain from my face. The names of my children… A boy and a girl. Agni has blessed me. "What did you say?" I ask her, needing to hear the names again, afraid to repeat their names for fear they too are a lie.

Mahari approaches me cautiously, like one would approach a wounded animal. Kneeling before me, she touches her forehead to my boots and weeps, mindless of the blood and mud on them. "I'm sorry, my lord. Please accept the apologies of a humble servant. My visions…" she chokes and looks up.

"They are fractured," she whispers fearfully. "I cannot make sense of them. I have become entangled in the delicate threads of fate. My gift is… unreliable."

"What do I care of your gift?" I hiss as I step away from her. "Your gift for lies! Your gift of manipulation!"

She hangs her head in what I assume is shame. "You were injured. I thought it best –"

"To what!" I shout, no longer caring about decorum. "To conspire against me! To steal my children! To sacrifice me to my father!"

The air is thick with my anger. The power of Sozin's comet thrums through me, taunting me with its power, singing to me to use it to strike the woman before me down. I could make her death quick and painless. I could turn her into a pile of ash with a mere thought.

Rubbing her sleeve across her face, Mahari straightens. Her features are not schooled as they normally are. They are void… almost lifeless. "I can offer no apology for my actions. I see that now. I never conspired against you. I did not steal your children. Katara was pregnant with them. You are the one who convinced her to leave. I… I tried to spare you from your father's wrath. I tried –"

"Did you try to stop me from raping my children's mother?"

"No," she admits shamefully.

I slam my fist on the table. "You've no idea how she haunts me. Her eyes are blue. They are filled with tears."

Mahari seeks to comfort me, but the glare I give her warns her off.

"She loves you, my lord. She makes her way across the ocean, even now."

"Lie!" I move to strike her, but miraculously hold my temper in check. I want to believe her. I want to believe that the woman who haunts my dreams loves me. I want to believe in a future, even when the stench of death clings to me.

"I speak the truth," she whispers, cowering before me. "I have seen this. As the moon rises, she shall land upon the shore."

"I thought you said your gift is unreliable."

Mahari bows her head. "It is, my lord. But I know this vision for what it is. Have the sentries stand watch. She will save you. She will save you all. She will be able to take you across the ocean."

I dare not feel hope. I won't survive the disappointment. I cling to my anger. I move to leave. "You had better hope she arrives before the sun rises or you will die."

Mahari nods in acceptance of her impending execution.

--

TBC

Author's Notes – Please accept my deepest, sincerest apologies for the lack of update on this story. It's such a dark story that it is often difficult to write. I'm currently on a business trip and had time to kill – time where there were no "Mommy, I want this. Mommy, I want that." Yeah! No interruptions! The reunion chapter is up next. I should have it up by the weekend. Wish me luck…


	29. Act III Chapter Eight

Act III

Chapter Eight

--

A haze of death surrounds me. Unable to see where I am going due to the heavy fog, I guide the ship toward the shore by sound. I am exhausted, having "sailed" the ship, which is the size of one of my father's warships, by bending the water beneath its bow. The fog is so thick that I can barely see the light of the full moon.

It is an eerie sensation. I feel as though I am floating over an abyss. The sound of the ocean should calm me, but I cannot seek comfort or rest until I am reunited with my children. I cannot accomplish that until I find Zuko.

The task is daunting. I have made it across the desert and the ocean, but now I must find my lover in a war zone. I hear a shout in the distance, and I stop propelling the boat across the water. I stand still, wondering if I am hearing things or if someone is nearby.

The momentum of the ship moves forward, the sound of water lapping the shore becomes louder. The wood creaks in protest as it drives into the sandy bottom. The ship lurches and tilts as it yields to momentum. I lose my footing and fly in the same direction, grasping for purchase along the splintered wood.

The ship settles on the beach. I take stock of my injuries as I try to stand. My hands are skinned with splinters, and I grazed my cheek on the railing. My injuries are not life threatening, but they are painful.

"Over here!" a faint voice calls in the distance. Other voices sound in the distance. It sounds as though I have landed in the middle of an army camp. I can only hope that I landed among friends and not foes.

Peering over the side of the ship, I shudder. I can hear the water. The movement of the ship tells me that it is beached. But I cannot see anything. The darkness that fell as I journeyed toward the Fire Nation seems thicker here – wherever here is. Did I even reach the Fire Nation?

Doubt bores tiny holes into my confidence. Loss of confidence leads to fear, an emotion that I have not yielded to for some time. I couldn't allow myself to wallow in it for too long. Now, it consumes me. The very nature of fear renders me senseless as I question every step I take. Should I hide? Should I run? Should I –"

"This way!" a voice barks in the distance. It is louder. They obviously heard the sound of my ship as it crashed upon their shore.

"Stupid fog," I whisper between clenched teeth. Somewhere in my panic, I decide to flee. I tie the flag that Pathik gave me around my waist. Hanging on to the prow, I pray that I land somewhere soft. My hands burn, protesting the demands I make upon them.

My ankle twists in the thick, damp sand, giving a resounding snap of grievous injury. Pain stacks on top of pain, coalescing with the fear, panic, and doubts that hinder me. I've come so far. How can I fail now? Kaya and Iroh need me. I must get back to them intact.

"The noise came from over here!" the voice insists as it draws closer.

"Are you sure?" a second voice answers. "Maybe it was a flock of turtle ducks or whale seals."

I try to stand and run, but I fall backwards into the pounding surf. The salt water stings the wounds on my hands and scrape on my face, and I cry out.

"It's a ship from the mainland."

I can hear them climb aboard the tilted vessel.

"Do you suppose they sent us supplies?" the voice asked.

"Supplies would be nice," the other voice answered. "But we need men more."

They are walking back and forth on the deck, searching the wreckage. The first man snorted. "Men? I'd prefer women. Do you know how long it's been since I've –"

"Yes, I do." I can hear the irritation in the second man's voice. "Do you think you're the only man who hasn't gotten laid in over four years?"

I stare into the darkness, unable to move. I hide beneath the port side of the ship, the lean of it giving me a convenient hiding spot. Ignoring the waves that push me against it, I bite my lip to keep from crying. Their conversation alone tells me to be wary of them.

There is a large splash next to me, and I yelp.

"Nolan!" one of the men cries out.

A bright ball of fire shines to my left. I can't fight. I can't stand.

"I'll be damned!" the one called Nolan exclaims. "Are you all right?" he asks softly.

I stare at the hand that he offers me, and I try to climb away from him. As another layer of pain washes over me, darkness consumes me. I try to fight the compulsion, but it is too great. I sink into the water, bemoaning my weakness and failure. I have failed Kaya and Iroh.

--

A myriad of emotions battle within me as I stare at the woman who has haunted my dreams. Katara. I know her name only because Jeong Jeong has spoken to me of her.

Mahari's execution has been delayed… for now. The Seer's visions aren't as unreliable as she would have me believe them to be. I still don't trust her.

The mother of my children rests fitfully, the only visible injury the raw, pink flesh of her cheek that Damuk healed. He had healed her hands and ankle. According to Nolan, she was lucky she didn't drown.

This is a dream. Or is it a nightmare? I long to touch the woman, yet I have no rights to do so. Our history in my nightmares has shown me the truth. Surely, she despises me. Weak and unable to resist, I reach out to touch her soft hair, but pull back as the flickering light of the lone lantern spotlights the scars that cover my hands. Jeong Jeong assures me that this woman cares for me, but I am sure that will change once she sees how malformed I have become, not to mention the history that looms like an infinite abyss between us.

Her presence should frighten me, but it doesn't. It soothes me. I feel different somehow. The pain of my life and the gray shroud that descended upon me have lifted, bringing raw emotions to the forefront of my pitiful existence. I had buried these emotions for so long that I hardly recognize them for what they are. My thoughts are disjointed, my reasoning flawed. They are my thoughts… not the omnipresent ramblings of the celestial harbinger that I am tied to.

The destructive nature of Sozin's comet is a silent buzz in my mind. Her mere presence drowns the murmurings of madness out. I want to wake her up. I have to see the color of her eyes. Are they the same color as they are in my dreams? I have convinced myself that the timbre of her voice is delicate and pure. I want to hear it. I want to banish the images of my nightmares. Instead of tears and condemnation, I want to see tears of joy in her azure eyes and hear words of love from her soft lips.

My body stirs as I struggle with the urge to take what I want most. The brutal slice of desire splits me in two. My groin aches and I rub the damaged flesh roughly, cursing the lust that harkens my disgrace.

I have no right to this woman. She has suffered enough by my hand.

My thoughts make me wary. Sitting next to her pallet, I close my eyes and meditate.

--

Breaking the surface of sleep is like breaking the surface of water. It is often disorienting and the first breath of surfacing is often one of affirmation. I am in a tattered tent, a setting that is disorienting enough if it weren't for the panicked memories that play through my fuzzy memory. I am alive. Have I been captured?

I throw off the blanket and sit up.

"You're safe," a familiar voice whispers next to me.

The only light in the tent is the flickering flame from a small lantern. My heart aches as I studied the outline of the man before me. Even in the darkness, I can see the changes. The letter that Mahari had sent to Song had mentioned that he had been injured, but even my worst imaginings could not compare with the reality of his scars.

His hair is cropped close to his head in uneven, shaggy patterns. A new scar crosses the old one over his left eye. His mouth is misshapen, part of his thin lips missing. The shape of his bottom lip bleeds into his chin.

He shifts uncomfortably and clears his throat.

He wears a linen tunic that is cut in a sharp angle, which affords me a glimpse of his neck and part of his chest. His pale, flawless skin is now riddled with a network of angry scars. His Adam's apple bobs as he swallows. I am surprised I can see the movement beneath the mangled skin on his neck. What I can see of his chest is pockmarked with rivulets of crisscrossed flesh. I move closer, intent on touching him, intent on verifying that he is real and not some wishful figment of my imagination.

Zuko grabs my wrist. "Don't… touch me… please."

Staring at his hand, I notice the scars there. "What did he do to you?" I whisper shakily.

He tries to pull away, but I will not let him retreat, and I grab hold of his hand.

--

I bear witness to the flood of emotions that cross her face – shock, sadness, pity, fear… Her eyes swim with tears. My body hardens, responding to her touch. My resolve slipping, I close my eyes and pretend that she looks at me without pity.

"He defended himself," I answer, my voice tinged with lust. "I would have done the same thing."

The phantom touch of her lips on my knuckles fans the flames of desire. "No, you wouldn't have. You never would have harmed your son."

Her words hold a conviction that shatters my illusion.

"Kaya and Iroh are safe," she whispers reassuringly. The unshed tears that shimmered for so long spill onto her cheeks. "At least, I hope they are safe. I left them with Toph."

I have heard those names before. I know that Kaya is my daughter and Iroh is my son. There are so many questions… so many gaps in my memories that I fear I shall never be whole. "Toph?"

Squeezing my hand, Katara smiles through her tears. "You know. Toph. A little on the short side, master Earthbender…"

--

Zuko stares at me, his gaze blank. I see hesitant recognition in his eyes, but it is clouded with restraint and fear. I can't stop touching him. It is only through tactile sensation that I can reaffirm that he is alive. His hesitation puzzles me, and I realize that something is terribly wrong. "Zuko?"

Angry shouts and explosions sound in the distance. Zuko rolls away from me, grabs his armor, and climbs out of the tent. I crawl after him, surprised to see the sun peeking over the horizon.

"What is it?" Zuko asks a passing soldier.

"They've broken through the pass, sir!" answers the soldier. "We're boxed in! There are too many to hold off!"

Yanking his armor on, he turns around in a circle and assesses the situation. "Make sure the wounded make it to the ship!" he barks, as an explosion goes off in the distance.

He grabs me, roughly shoving me toward the soldier. "Take her to the ship! We'll hold them off as long as we can!"

I balk, pushing the soldier away. "I'm not leaving you! I left you before. I won't do it again!"

My lover's face pales. "Katara –"

"My lord, the wounded were loaded onto the ship an hour ago."

Another explosion rips through the serenity of the morning sky, this time closer.

Zuko curses. "Where's Mahari?"

The soldier looks nervous. "She left a few hours ago, my lord. She said you had instructed her to go north to seal off the catacombs."

Biting his malformed, bottom lip, Zuko studies the mountains. "Sound the call for retreat. Go to the ship. Set sail for the Earth Kingdom. We'll just have to take a chance that they won't blow us out of the water before we reach their shores."

I reach for the material that I had tied about my waste and heave a sigh of relief. I untie the flag. "Fly this. Pathik gave it to me. He said it would allow us safe passage."

Zuko chuckles, clutching the material in his hand.

The soldier looks at Zuko, fearful that his lord has gone made.

I refuse to let the madness take him from me. I've come too far to abandon him now. Reaching out, I touch the shoulder of his armor. "What is it?"

Zuko's golden gaze captures mine. Moisture clings to his eyelashes. "She said you would come. She said you would save us… that you would save me."

Leaning into him, I press myself against his armor. Even through the armor, I can feel his heart pounding. He is rigid as I place a kiss upon his lips. "I've come to far to lose you now."

Explosions draw closer, and Zuko steps away from me.

"Sound the retreat!" he commands the soldier, taking me by the hand and leading me toward the shore.

--

TBC

Author's Notes: Whew! What a wild ride! I know everyone was expecting some spectacularly hot reunion scene, but I just didn't feel like the timing was right for that. Their reunion will span out over this chapter and the next two chapters. Thanks to all who have reviewed, and to everyone for their patience while I nitpick through each chapter before sharing them. God bless!


	30. Act III Chapter Nine

Act III

Chapter Nine

--

We have been sailing toward Earth Kingdom waters throughout the day. The able-bodied soldiers man the sails, taking the burden of bending the water beneath the hull from me. There are thirty-five survivors, including Zuko and myself. I have devoted the day below deck with Damuk, tending to the wounded.

It took a few hours of working alongside him before I realize that it is to him that I owe my gratitude to. He is the one who saved Zuko.

"If you would just stay still and do as you're told, you wouldn't have this problem, you old curmudgeon," Damuk chastises his patient irritably.

Looking past the healer, I see a familiar shaggy mop of silvery-gray hair on the pillow.

"Where is she?" The gruff response of Jeong Jeong's question is barely a whisper as he struggles to breathe. "Where's Mahari?"

"She's gone," Zuko announces from the doorway of the small cabin. The ship has about five sleeping compartments. The other sections of the vessel are storage areas.

I turn to look at him. As has been the case since we set sail, he averts his gaze and does not acknowledge me.

"She left before the attack." He limps toward Jeong Jeong's bunk and leans against the bulkhead. "She went to seal the catacombs."

Jeong Jeong curses and struggles to sit up.

Throwing his hands in the air, Damuk walks away. "When you bleed out, don't come crying to me, old man!"

The dimming rays of the setting sun spill through the hatch, lending precious light to the lone oil lamp in the cabin. Zuko kneels next to the general's bed and helps him sit up. "I would have stopped her if I had known. She left the camp without permission."

Growling, Jeong Jeong holds his chest and pants. I can see the pain in his eyes. It isn't pain from his injury. It is concern for Mahari. I move to see to his comfort, and recognition lights his eyes. "Hello Katara."

Before I can reply, Zuko leaves.

I watch him, unable to hide my disappointment. Plastering what I hope is a convincing smile upon my face, I kneel next to the fallen Fire Nation general. "Hello, Jeong Jeong. It is good to see you again."

"You look well."

"I wish I could say the same for you," I tease, grabbing a cloth and wringing the water from it. Leaning forward, I dab the perspiration on his forehead.

Jeong Jeong's gray eyes grow moist. "She said you would come."

"That is what Zuko said," I sigh, looking toward the entrance of the cabin hopefully. I thought that the ache in my heart when we were apart was unbearable. I thought it would ease once we were together, but it has only worsened. His parting words so long ago come back to haunt me.

_I don't love you. I promised Aang I would take care of you should anything happen._

The realization sickens me. The dreams meant nothing. I was only an obligation to him. I was –

"He doesn't remember, Katara," Jeong Jeong whispers, grimacing in pain and closing his eyes.

"What?" I wipe my sleeve across my face, catching my tears before they fall.

His callused hand covers mine, his expression pained and somber. "Zuko doesn't remember anything of his past."

I gasp as Jeong Jeong continues. "As you can see by the scarring, Ozai wounded him… mortally wounded him. When Zuko woke, he couldn't speak. It was months before he could. At first, we thought he had succumbed to the madness of Sozin's comet. He didn't even know his own name."

The general shifts, trying to get comfortable. I offer him water to drink, but he refuses. With a silent nod, I encourage him to go on.

He grunts and clutches his chest. "Mahari thought it best to keep the truth from him, but his dreams revealed the harsh truth of who had been… what he had done."

"What do you mean?" I sit back on my ankles.

Jeong Jeong glances toward the entrance guiltily as if he is about to betray a confidence. "Zuko's nightmares… He told me of them once. In them, he described… forcing… himself on a woman. It was you he described. No one has eyes as blue as yours. It is your name he calls out at night… in torment and agony. He hardly sleeps now."

"But Zuko didn't force me," I reply, my tone lacking conviction as I recall the times he did force himself upon me. I hated him then. Little did I know then that he was as much a victim as I was.

"It haunts him, Katara." Jeong Jeong grimaces and takes a slow shuddering breath.

"You should rest," I encourage him. I want to hear more about Zuko, but I cannot subject this man to any more pain.

His eyes drift shut, and he slumps forward. As gently as I can, I ease him backwards into a more comfortable position.

Splashing water onto my face, I steel myself for the coming confrontation and go in search of my lover.

--

I am a monster. I am weak. I want her. I have done my best to avoid her, for I fear that I shall harm her. Watching the sun set, I clasp the shadow of a memory that has surfaced. It isn't much, but it is something.

I had a brief glimpse of my past as Katara refused to leave me to my death on the beach. For a moment I was in the catacombs Mahari always talked of. There was an underground river. I was injured and Katara would not leave me.

Sighing, I lean against the railing as I try to alleviate some of the pain in legs.

"Zuko?" Her voice is a double-edged sword. On one hand, it is like a soothing balm for my worn soul. On the other, it reminds me that she is near. I cannot get too close to her. The temptation is too great. I do not wish to harm her again.

The silver flag flaps on the mainsail post, snapping in the wind and pointing us in the direction of our salvation.

Salvation… A concept I never could grasp until Katara returned.

I turn to leave, but grabs my elbow.

"Please," she whispers, her voice carrying over the sound of the waves. "Please don't walk away."

I feel her touch all the way to my soul. A tremor courses through me, and I close my eyes. I am frozen, unable to move away from her even though every instinct shouts for me to do so. What is this power she holds over me?

"We need to talk," Katara says. "Jeong Jeong told me that you… don't remember."

The moonlight catches her hair, casting blue-black streaks into the strands. I should feel betrayed by my general's loose lips, but I don't. I knew he would tell her.

Sighing, she moves in front of me, between the rail and me. I try to step back, but Katara wraps her arms around my waist and tugs my resistant body toward hers. "I've come too far to let something like this come between us again," she murmurs, pressing her cheek against my shoulder as if she is seeking some measure of comfort.

There is nothing seductive about her lack of regard for my personal space. The hug is one of comfort and remorse. I deserve neither. "Katara…" My voice is a husky prayer.

I shiver and close my eyes, picturing myself whole. I imagine the woman in my arms coming toward me with a serene smile on her face, embracing me willingly. I relax and give myself over to her care.

Pulling back, she looks at me, a sad smile gracing her full lips. "Since you have forgotten, I will tell you… most everything," she teases.

"Everything?" I ask.

She blushes, suddenly finding a spot on the deck to study. "There are some thoughts that you will never be privy to."

I chuckle. I am not sure who is startled by the sound of my laughter most – Katara, the deckhands, or me. The moment of brevity is a welcome one. Katara taps her chin with her finger, as if she is trying to decide where she should start.

"Kaya and Iroh…" she starts, nibbling on her bottom lip in worry. "They'll be five soon. I named Kaya after my mother and Iroh after your uncle. Do you remember him?"

I shake my head, transfixed by the feel of her holding me and the sound of her voice. I don't remember my uncle. I assume that he was nothing like my father. Otherwise, Katara would not have named my son after him.

She touches my cheek, the tactile sensation barely felt through all the scarring. She searches for words, struggling to piece my past together so that I may understand it. She doesn't realize that I am glad I have forgotten it.

"I hurt you," I whisper reverently, covering her hand with mine. "Why don't you hate me?"

Her eyes linger on my misshapen lips. Closing my eyes, I shudder. I am thirsty for this woman. How can she stand to touch me, let alone look at me?

"I did hate you," she admits. "I hated your touch. I reviled your sarcastic remarks… despised you for what you did. But you did it to protect me. You did it to protect my brother, Sokka."

"I raped you… I – "

"You were my lover before then," she defends me against my own self-recriminations, her thumb brushing over my lips and stoking my desire for her. "You couldn't fight your father. We would be dead now if it weren't for your quick decision. Aang was dead… and all hope was dead with him."

"Don't," I growl softly, clasping her hand and pulling it away. Visions of violence play in my memory. I burn for this woman. There is no way I can be the gentle man she needs me to be. "I'm not the same person. I can't be that person."

"I'm not asking you to be the same person," she replies and places a gentle kiss on my knuckles. "I'm not asking anything of you, Zuko. If I were to ask something of you, I would ask you not to push me away."

I am reluctant, yet I agree. I am drawn to her. I should walk away, but I won't. She enchants me, the promise in her almond-shaped eyes holding me captive. Though I seek to protect her by distancing myself from her, I see now that it is a strategy that will never work. "Tell me something, Katara."

"Yes?" Her smile is bright with hope.

"Did you pursue me or did I pursue you?"

A blush heightens the coloring of her cheeks, giving me the answer I sought. She has suffered untold horrors to find me, for what purpose, I do not know. But I can see the stubborn resolve in the delicate tilt of her chin and know that I cannot turn her away.

--

TBC

Author's Notes – I cannot thank everybody who has been kind enough to review this story. And I can't thank you all enough for your patience.


	31. Act III Chapter Ten

Act III

Chapter Ten

--

I wake to unfamiliar surroundings and sensations. The wooden creak of the ship as it makes its way across the water is constant and loud. The swaying motion lulls me. The fact that I was even able to sleep amazes me. As the rays of dawn peek through the wooden planks of the deck above us, I can see Katara's shining azure eyes.

"Rest while you can, Zuko," she murmurs softly, caressing my cheek. "We are still a while away from the mainland. The wounded are recovering. We have enough water and fish for the journey. All is well. Rest while you can."

"Fish?" My voice cracks as I try to shake off the effects of my slumber.

Her smile is like the light, bright and full of promise. "Fish are no match for Waterbenders. You have no worries now. Go back to sleep," she coaxes me, petting my cheek and forehead. Her touch is cool and soothing, and I close my eyes.

I let myself drift like the ship across the water, yielding to a hopeful dream.

_I am walking down the corridor of the Fire Nation's palace, a building that now lies in ruins. Pools of water replace ribbons of fire-colored material along the walls. I can see my reflection in them. Out of habit, I flinch. But when I look closer, I realize that most of my scarring has faded. The only pronounced scar is the one that surrounds my left eye. _

_This is a dream I yearn for. _

_I am whole. _

_The guards snap to attention as I open the doors to my bedchambers. The room is large, dotted with various pieces of furniture throughout, but sparse in nature. A large bed dominates the middle of the room. _

_Instead of the scathing anger, blissful warmth surrounds me. Sighing with, I allow myself to dwell within the fantasy realm. _

_Katara sleeps peacefully, her dark eyelashes touching her cheeks like silent testament to the peaceful moment._

_Hastily, I divest myself of my armor and tunic, the trappings of my position. I know that it is selfish of me to wake her, but I must touch heaven one last time. I slide my hand inside the loose fabric of her nightclothes and caress responsive nipples. _

_I watch in the firelight cast from the surrounding wall sconces the reaction of her body as her nipples tighten against the silk fabric. I hear the catch in her breath as she awakens. _

_She hums my name, "Zuko," and arches her back. _

_Emotion chokes me. She professes her love to me daily whether I want to hear it or not. She touches me on a level where I exist as someone else… someone who isn't flawed. This is the future I yearn for, the one that I shall never have._

_I capture her lips, claiming what I desire most in this life. The kiss is deep, tongue dueling tongue, lips seeking to go even deeper. I drink her passionate groan, and my head swims. I hold my future in my arms. I hold forgiveness and love. _

_Katara gently bats my hand away and sits up. She removes her gown slowly, enticingly. She has confided in me, shared with me the thoughts she once said I would never be privy to. Taking my hand in hers, she guides it to the dark curls that guard her feminine secrets._

_My eyes roll back into my head. Touching her heat is like touching the sun. It scorches my soul and promises me an eternity of bliss. "Katara…" I am finally able to speak. "I need you."_

_Smiling, she leans back and opens her legs. The serenity I seek lies within her body. A thirst like none other overwhelms me. I crawl toward her, dipping my head to drink from the fount of her womb. _

_She gasps, my name a whispered prayer upon her lips. Her fingers tangle in my hair as she holds me to task. Her honeyed warmth feeds my undeserving soul. She is so open and free that I must hold on to the morsel before me. Her scent and taste are intoxicating and exhilarating, and I lap at her flesh greedily. Her movements and breathless pleas heighten my own pleasure. _

"_Please," she begs me, pulling my hair and coaxing me to shift position. She need not encourage me. I need the same thing. _

Climbing up her body, I position myself within the cradle of her body. She clasps my weeping flesh and guides the aching tip to her heated slit. With a strangled groan, I thrust into her and…

I wake up. My head is pillowed in Katara's lap. My hair and face are damp. The cool mist of water as she bends it around my head provides welcome relief from the constant ache that I have grown accustomed to.

Her face is serene as she concentrates.

"Katara," I say her name and blink as the water recedes into a nearby bowl.

"I… I'm sorry," she whispers. She is pale and shaken. "I thought it best to try to heal you while you slept."

I should be offended that she didn't ask permission. Even if I had refused, like I often do with Damuk, she wouldn't have taken no for an answer. "I was dreaming."

"Oh?" She moves her hand across my cheek. "What about?"

"You," I answer, catching her hand in mine and rubbing the flesh of her palm across my damaged skin.

"Those nightmares… They weren't all that there was between us." She seeks to reassure me. Her courage holds no bounds. She is the one who suffered by my hand. To receive comfort from her is an absolution I could only beg for. "We were lovers before we were captured. We –"

"My dream was… pleasant," I reply. I can't help myself, and I kiss her fingertips. The dream was full of vibrant colors and fierce sensations. The ache is too much to bear. I want this woman more than my next breath. My blood boils within my veins and pools within my loins.

"Oh." Her mouth forms a perfect "o" as the blush heightens her beauty.

Licking my lips, I lift up onto my elbows and hold my breath. The hottest fire is the bluest fire, and that is what burns in her eyes as she lowers her head. I should feel guilty, asking this of her… asking her to kiss a malformed monster.

There is no hesitation on her part as she presses her mouth against mine. I inhale, greedily committing the scent of her purity to memory. I gasp when she deepens the kiss, running her tongue along the tight seam of my lips. Her tongue sweeps against mine, coaxing me to play. She tastes sweet, like a sugared dumpling.

--

He tastes like exotic spices, every one of his movements hesitant and unsure. I knew that he could not forget the love that we shared. Though he may not speak the words, I know he can feel it.

I should feel guilty for healing him without his permission, but I won't. I could see him slip into the realm of nightmares that are his prison now. My mother would do that. She would heal our nightmares by bending water around our heads and singing to us. Though none of his scars responded to my healing abilities, I am confidant that I will be able to heal them eventually.

Zuko groans beneath me, and I break the kiss, pulling away from him and helping him to sit up. "I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?" I ask.

Before he can answer, shouts pierce the serenity of the moment.

"Land!" one soldier calls out.

Zuko shudders and moves to stand. Grabbing my hands in his, he pulls me to my feet. "Thank you," he says, brushing my wild hair out of my face.

My heart feels as though it may explode from my chest as his golden eyes peer into mine. He may have suffered untold agony. He may have been scarred horribly. But his eyes are the same. I fell in love with those eyes long ago.

"My lord!" another soldier beckons for their leader. "There are troops lining the shore!"

Zuko snaps to attention and pulls away from me, climbing up the ladder and onto the deck.

--

The Fire Lord and the Waterbender are a sight for my old eyes. I had begun to fear that helping Katara (giving her the flag so that they would not be fired upon) had angered the Goddess. Unlike my daughter, I believe that our gift of foresight was sent to us from a higher power.

Per my instructions, the Earth Kingdom citizens in the village I live in have rallied to assist the survivors of the Kroni siege of the Fire Nation.

I can remember a time when Fire Nation forces occupied this land.

The Fire Nation is no more.

In his quest for power, Ozai destroyed his own nation. He invited the plague onto his lands. He stirred the nest of Kroni vipers into their ravenous rage, making promises to them that he did not fulfill.

As I watch the interaction between the bitter enemies, I cannot help but see the irony. There is no lingering resentment between Earth Kingdom and Fire Nation. They have come to the realization that they are citizens of something greater than the sum of a national identity.

Fire Lord Zuko catches Katara as she stumbles over some driftwood on the beach. I smile, witnessing the gentle caress of his hand upon her arm. There are difficult times ahead for them, but their feelings for one another will see them through their journeys safely.

Seeing me, Katara's smile falters. She is sad for me. Though Mahari is not with them, I know that I shall see my daughter again.

"Hello, Pathik," she greets me with a low bow of respect.

Zuko stares at me, his gaze curious. He gives me a slight nod of acknowledgement though he knows not who I am.

"Hello, Katara." I fold my hands together and kowtow before her. She knows not how important she is or the role she will fulfill. Her path is a treacherous one, filled with difficult decisions. Of course, letting go of one's children is always a painful process. "Fire Lord Zuko, it is an honor to meet you."

His golden eyes flash in warning, and he puts himself between his beloved and myself. "How did you know who I am?"

He wears the armor of a regular soldier. There is no rank or insignia. He is right to be suspicious, but not of me. His fate is intertwined with Katara's. In time, she will heal the scars that cover his body. She must… before the infections return and claim the other half of her soul.

"It's all right, Zuko." Katara soothes him with a light touch and the gentle cadence of her voice. "This is Pathik, Mahari's father."

He looks down, suddenly unable to meet my gaze. "My apologies. Please accept my condolences on the loss of your child."

"I shall see my daughter again," I state simply. "She is not lost. She will find her way."

"He is a seer like Mahari," Katara explains.

"Speaking of children…" I step back and motion for them to follow me. "I have a sand glider ready to take you home, Katara. You're children are missing you."

She turns to Zuko, hope shining in her loving gaze. "You will come, won't you?"

A myriad of expressions cross the fierce warrior's face. Longing. Fear. Hope. And finally acceptance. "Yes," he replies, his voice soft with emotion as he contemplates meeting his children for the first time.

--

TBC

Author's Notes: Thanks to all who have reviewed! I really hate to do this, but I shall be taking a break to plot out the reunion chapter with the children. (Ducks and hides from the tomatoes being thrown at her.) I give no estimate on the next chapter. I do know that I need a day or two to recuperate from writing.

As many of you know, I've had multiple surgeries on my hands. I'd like to say I'm cured, but I'm not. So, I must take the time and lay off the typing. Thanks for all the support and reviews for this story!


	32. Act III Chapter Eleven

Act III

Chapter Eleven

--

Sand and wind sting the skin of my hands as we traverse the barren landscape of the desert. It is a welcome sensation. Any sensation is welcome. The wind is deafening, and it takes my breath away, even through the protective cloth that covers my face. I see very little as I peer through the eyewear the Sandbender gave to me.

I ignore the monotonous dunes and focus on Katara. She huddles close to the edge as though poised to jump off the first chance she gets.

Katara…

Her presence is like an affirmation of life for me. She is strong and resourceful. I have no memories of that, but I know that it is true. As if sensing my scrutiny, she crawls across the canvas bottom of the glider and takes my hands in hers.

She tries to tell me something, but I cannot hear the cadence of her voice over the harsh howl of the wind. She pulls my hands into the folds of her garment, and I feel warmth spread through me.

The act is not meant to be seductive. It is one of kindness and reassurance. It is an act of love. The woman that shields me from the nip of the sandy wind loves me. It's reflected in her eyes whenever she looks at me. I wish I could see her eyes now. But, like mine, sand goggles cover them.

Did I love her?

I do not want an answer, but the brutality of my dreams has already shown me the truth. I should have found a way to love her. I should have fought to the death to protect her. Though I sense an underlying strength within her, she is a gentle soul—one that should be cherished and loved.

Am I up to the task? What if I cannot protect her again? Should I push her away to save her? How do I sacrifice the purity of her affections when the beast within me growls for more?

She evokes emotions I buried after I woke. She touches me, and I feel it!

Time is a concept that is lost to me. I was reborn to pain years ago. I have no past to draw from to guide the errant thoughts that whisper to me. Madness haunts my soul. The delicate balance between insanity and reality tipped when Katara came back into my life, but did it tip for the better… or for the worse.

I should not encourage her affections, but the selfish creature that I am will not sacrifice that small measure of happiness.

A shout interrupts my introspective musings. The sand glider shifts direction and heads toward a small selection of crude buildings that break the endlessness of the desert lands. The sun is setting over the horizon, illuminating the burnt orange colors of the sky and the small village that looms before us.

Doubts resurface as I remember my conversation with Jeong Jeong months ago. _"Tell me nothing of them. I am obviously the monster my dreams reveal me to be. They are hidden from me for a reason and shall remain that way."_

Danger follows me. I should not be here, nor should I acknowledge the children as mine, but the selfish beast within me will not deprive himself of Katara's company.

Wherever she goes, I will follow. That is the nature of the beast.

--

Zuko helps me off the sand glider and glares at the Sandbender who tried to help me down. I would reassure him and tell him his jealousy is unwarranted, but I have missed my children and need to see for myself that they are well.

Stripping off the sand gear and goggles, I run toward the hut. Desperation claws at me. Kaya and Iroh should be in bed by now, but I had envisioned both my children running toward me with open arms.

As I draw closer, the rickety old door opens and Toph walks out.

"Thank the Goddess you're back!" she shouts. She looks harassed and tired. Of course, Toph normally looks a little rough around the edges, but to see her like this alarms me.

"Where are Kaya and Iroh?" I ask quickly, tearing at the protective gloves that cover my hands and throwing them onto the ground.

"They're in bed," she answers, her head cocking to the side as she "sees" Zuko behind me. "I don't believe it!" gasps Toph. "Kaya said you'd find him."

I want to ignore Toph's summation of Kaya's prophetic statement, but I can't. I rush past her into the cramped hut where my children have lived like beggars these past years.

The light of the fire casts shadows about the room. Though it is hot during the days, the nights are always cold. My eyes scan the occupants of the bed.

Iroh is asleep on his stomach, his ass in the air, and his thumb in his mouth. It feels as though I have been away from him longer than I have. His brown hair has lightened, undoubtedly a result of playing too much in the sun. His cheeks are red with sunburn. My son shudders in his sleep and sucks on his thumb. He is gifted with the ability to fall asleep quickly.

Kaya's blue eyes are heavy-lidded, but they open wide when she sees me. "Momma!" she whispers excitedly, crawling over her brother in her effort to get to me. She stifles a yawn and wraps her arms around my neck.

I inhale her clean scent. Like her brother, her cheeks are sunburned.

"I knew you would be back tonight," she announces excitedly, bouncing up and down on the pallet. I scoop her into my arms and hug her tight, raining kisses upon her cheeks. Bundling her up, I carry her outside.

Her chatter reminds me of Momo, her words nonsensical as she tries to tell me about what she and her brother have done while I was away.

Kaya looks over my shoulder and gasps. Toph and Zuko are standing next to the muddy spring, both silent and content to watch the happy reunion between mother and daughter.

She wiggles out of my grasp and runs toward Zuko, stopping short as if someone has pulled her back.

Zuko kneels before his daughter, uncertainty flickering in the shadows of his amber gaze.

"He said you would come," Kaya whispers, her tiny hand cupping Zuko's scarred cheek. "You're right, Uncle. He is handsome."

Toph shudders, doing an odd side-step dance away from them. "Stop it, Kaya. You're freaking me out!"

Kaya goes to move away, but Zuko covers her hand with his.

"Toph?" I ask, looking from the Earthbender to my lover and daughter.

"Aunt Toph doesn't like it when I talk to Great Uncle Iroh," Kaya states solemnly. "You told me that I wasn't allowed to talk to strangers. Seeing as he, Aang, and Aunt Azula aren't strangers, I figured that it was okay to talk to them. I –"

"Azula!" I gasp in horror.

Toph shuffles her feet in the sand. "Oh yeah! Apparently, Iroh, Azula, Appa, and Momo showed up shortly after you left."

Unperturbed by her preternatural sight, Kaya studies her father. Her tiny hand traces his misshapen lips. Zuko closes his eyes.

"Don't worry, Daddy," the little girl soothes. "I'll fix you once I learn to Waterbend. Once we go to the North Pole, you'll be fine. Uncle says the pool where Tui and La swim will heal your scars… all of them, except this one." Kaya lovingly touches the old scar over his left eye. "Uncle says it is a symbol of your honor."

I cannot stop my tears, and I cannot intervene. My daughter is the Avatar. Though circumstances were manipulated surrounding her conception, she was born to restore the balance – a task that is even more daunting than before. Is it not right for her to start with her father? Is it not right for her to try to heal him?

--

Like her mother's touch, I feel the gentle caress of my daughter's touch against my flesh. She has Katara's pale blue eyes, surrounded by midnight-black lashes. The contrast is made even more remarkable by her pale skin. Her cheeks are reddened, her fair complexion having yielded to the punishing rays of the sun.

"That's not all," the stocky Earthbender sighs, addressing Katara. "Iroh is a bender."

Katara's eyes widen. I can see the fear and uncertainty in them.

"Iroh's a Firebender like daddy!" Kaya announces with a wide smile as she continues to investigate the ridges of scars. "He's going to teach me once I master the other elements. Mommy will teach me Waterbending. Aunt Toph will teach me Earthbending. Daddy and Iroh can teach me Firebending."

She speaks to me as though I have always been with her. I yearn to know more of this enchanting child.

"Aang has already started teaching me how to be an Airbender," Kaya says with enthusiasm as she turns toward her mother. "Watch this!"

My daughter steps back and runs around the bubbling mud spring. It is a feat that most parents would applaud without looking, but Kaya ran around the decrepit railing in the blink of an eye.

Proud of her accomplishment and a little short of breath, she stops in front of Katara and looks up. "I know you told me not to run, but Aang taught me how to breathe, and I don't need the mud anymore. Tomorrow, he said he would teach me how to make an air scooter."

Katara's eyes are wide. She sways on her feet, and I move to catch her as she crumples to the ground.

"Mommy!" Kaya cries out, rushing to her mother's side.

"I'll go get some water." Toph walks toward the row of huts.

"I'm fine," Katara whispers shakily, pushing against my chest to sit up.

"I'm sorry, Mommy," Kaya sniffles, wrapping her arms around her mother's neck and needing comfort. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"I'm fine, Kaya," she tells our daughter, hugging the child and stroking her hair. "Toph is right. I just need some water."

Over the top of our daughter's head, I see the worry in her eyes. She cannot conceal the shimmering tears as she succumbs to the fear. I wipe the tears away with my thumb.

"You need rest," I say, my voice thick with emotion. "A gain makes me sing; a loss makes me sullen. Worries and regrets are always around. If there is wine today, then today is the day to get drunk. Worry about tomorrow's worries when they come tomorrow."

Katara gasps as I quote an ancient philosopher.

Kaya giggles. "That's what Uncle always says."

--

TBC

Author's Notes: Zuko is actually quoting a poet of the Tang Dynasty, Luo Yin.

Oh my Goodness! How long has it been? Too long, I know. My hands have no improved. I have two of them and am facing my fourth surgery. But that isn't the only reason the updates on this story have taken so long. Sniff! I've lost my Avatar muse. Has anybody seen it? I thought by now that season three would have started. I was counting on season three to bring forth a ton of inspiration. Well, so far… No season three.

As many of you know, I write Harry Potter fan fiction. To say the least, that muse is creative and fruitful right now. So, if you see updates from me… I'm not ignoring my Avatar stories. I'm just not inspired to work on them.

As always, I must thank Moncapitan for shooting down stupid ideas and making me look at the big picture. MC, you rock! Thanks for the help and the not-so-gentle nudges.


	33. Act III Chapter Twelve

Act III

Chapter Twelve

The light of the full moon shines like a lonely beckon in the sky, testament to the waning effects of Sozin's comet. Though daylight surrounds me, the moon is still present. Will I live long enough to feel the unpolluted rays of the sun warm my face again? Will my children?

Questions with no answers taunt my dreams and waking moments. Three moons have passed since my arrival at the desert oasis. Three moons since I have looked upon the cherub faces of my son and daughter. Though the reunion with Katara and meeting Kaya and Iroh for the first time is cause to rejoice, the shadows of my past consume me with darkness. The others who were here when I arrived left two moons ago, released from their duties upon my arrival – two women and a burly man.

The oasis consists of a muddy spring that nurtures a radius of green grass around it. Various buildings surround it, forming a natural barrier against the corrosive element of sand. Only two of the buildings are suitable to inhabit. The others have crumbled walls or collapsed ceilings. To say the least, our quarters are cramped and there have been nights where I have wandered outside to sleep beneath the stars.

Our life is simple. Katara provides water and reluctantly teaches Kaya to bend water. Food is provided by monthly visits from our guardians, the Sandbenders. Katara's brother, though addled, tends a flock of three sheep-goats. Toph, the Earthbender with the brusque attitude, repairs the two buildings we inhabit. Believe it or not, it is a full-time job.

Katara… She nurtures Kaya and Iroh with the grace and fluidic motion of her native element. She tries to heal me everyday, but my wounds are beyond her abilities. My memories remain lost.

Our exile is as close to paradise as I probably deserve. My daughter is precocious, and I am happily wrapped around her finger. Iroh is more cautious, his little sister's fiercest defender.

My son looks just like me, his golden eyes reflecting the uncertainty of the events around him. I can see that he has many questions, but he does not ask them. His bending abilities are erratic and troublesome. He cannot control the flame from a candle. I have tried to counsel him regarding his technique, but he does not listen.

My daughter, who insists that my uncle's spirit is beside me always, informs me that Uncle Iroh's spirit is pleased that Agni saw fit to gift me with a son that is so similar to myself. Upon asking Kaya what she meant by that, I realized that I have always been a stubborn pupil. Jeong Jeong often reminded me that I was a hopeless cause. I cannot help but laugh at the irony. Though my memories dance in the shadows, I know it to be true.

"I don't want to!" the shrill, angry voice of my daughter declares in the distance. She marches across the courtyard, her hands covering her ears. She is singing loudly, as if trying to drown noise out. I expect her brother to be taunting her again, but Iroh is nowhere to be found. "Daddy! Tell them no!"

"Tell who no, Kaya?" I reply. The wind whips around my daughter like a tempest, whether of her own volition or nature's I am unsure. She is upset, tears and dirt marring the perfection of her soft skin. She hiccups as she draws closer. Her brother jumps from behind one of the buildings and follows her, concern etched in his young features. Katara sets the bucket of water down and hurries toward Kaya, but our daughter reaches me first.

Scooping her into my arms, I pet her soft, raven hair soothingly as she continues hiccupping. Her little hands clutch the hair at the back of my neck. Touch is an odd sensation, one I never took much stock in since my awakening. My daughter's touch is feather light, a gift that brings tears to me. She is trembling.

--

The look in Zuko's eyes betrays his concern. Three months have passed since our return, a sense of normalcy descending upon me as I continue lying to myself. Our lives are anything but normal. Threats loom on the horizon, threats I do not wish to address. The fear and anger in my daughter's voice is indescribable. It besieges me, and panic claws its way to the surface of my fragile exterior.

Though her face is buried against her father's neck I touch her cheek and encourage her to look up. "Kaya, what is it?" I ask, gingerly stroking the top of Iroh's head as he hugs my legs.

My daughter sniffles and mumbles into her father's collar. Words cannot express the constant fear and panic that festers like an infected wound. I am afraid for my children. I am afraid for Zuko, Toph, and Sokka. No matter how much I chastise myself for the errant thoughts that run rampant in my mind, I cannot stop them. I feel like a lone reed, floating along raging rapids.

Is this all there is?

It was so much simpler when Aang was alive. Sacrificing myself for the greater good was so much easier than this. I saw the look in Pathik's eyes… the doubt over Mahari's fate. How am I expected to sacrifice my daughter for the greater good? What of my son?

Those are the thoughts that keep me awake at night. They are the darkness that lurks in the shadows of my soul.

"They…" Kaya hiccups and sniffles. "They said that we have to leave before the Sandbenders… fall. They said we have to go to the underground city of Ba Sing Se."

My spine stiffens. I accepted long ago that my daughter was the Avatar. Like Aang, the communion with the Spirit World always makes me nervous. The fact that Ozai died brings me no comfort. How does one battle a trapped spirit?

Kaya shudders in Zuko's arms and points toward the east. A sandstorm rages in the distance, not an odd occurrence in these parts, but a fact of life. The oasis, by its very nature, has isolated us from the rest of the world. "Kaya." My voice is calm, though my feelings are not. "We've been through sandstorms before. That one is several days away… if it is even heading our way."

My little girl sobs, her crystalline eyes shining with tears. She stares at the cloud, horror flickering in them. "The sand is blue," she says, her voice soft and exhausted.

Zuko and I stare at the horizon; the telltale sign of lightening streaking through the sand cloud is unmistakable.

"We have to leave," I whisper shakily.

"I don't understand," Zuko answers. "How did the Sect of Kroni survive the crossing?"

I have no answer for him. I lift Iroh, grasp Zuko's hand, and run toward our hut. Sokka limps after us, forgetting his herding "duties." Toph exits the hut and wipes her brow. "We have to gather what we can. We're leaving," I announce.

Zuko stops. "Katara. It's suicide," he reasons.

"Staying here is suicide," I retort.

"They are days away, possibly a week." He tries to console me, but his words are meaningless. I am irrational.

"We have to leave," I choke. Tears trickle down my cheeks, exposing my fear and weakness. I set Iroh down.

--

Her icy eyes are wild and panicked. It is a look I am all too familiar with, having seen it on the battlefield. It is the berserker's gaze. The determination to protect our younglings is etched in every fiber of her being.

Setting down Kaya, I grasp Katara by her shoulders and shake her. "Think, Katara. The battle rages far away…"

"Are you suggesting we wait here to be slaughtered?" she hisses.

I pull her unyielding body against mine, my lips close to her ear. "Even if the battle is one by Kroni's forces, it will take them days to cross the desert. Your fear has blinded you to common sense. We cannot run into the desert without provisions. You would be condemning us to a certain death. We must plan." Only she can hear my whispers of desperation. If I do not get through to her now, I fear that I may never reach her.

"Kaya is scared. Iroh plays at bravery. Sokka is addled, and Toph is blind. We know what must be done."

Katara rests her forehead on my shoulder. "You're right. I'm sorry."

I touch her hair and close my eyes. "Never apologize for being afraid."

"You're so brave," she states softly.

I am just as afraid as she is, but I don't think she needs to hear it right now. We need to start packing. I glance at the sky, the orange tinge of the comet blocking the rays of the sun. I stare at the horizon northwest of us. Only within the underground cavern of Old Ba Sing Se will we find protection. But first, we must cross the desert.

Agni, have mercy on us all.

--

TBC of course.

Author's Notes – Since my last update, I've had another surgery on my right hand. I apologize profusely for not letting everyone know. I am happy to report that my right hand is on the road to recovery. I still, unfortunately, have to have surgery on my left hand, which is going to have to wait. I find out Thursday if I have to have surgery on my left shoulder. Sheesh! I hit thirty-five and my warranty expired.

I have not abandoned my stories, even in the light of the season three spoilers that were recently released. Though I am a die-hard Zutaran, I respect all ships and applaud everyone who writes fan fiction. It is a wonderful creative endeavor and is meant to hone writing skills.

As always, thanks to all who have reviewed over time. The next chapter will be the last chapter to Act III. Then it is on to the final Act. God Bless.


	34. Act III Chapter Thirteen

Act III

Chapter Thirteen

Two days have passed since our exodus into the desert. We travel by night and sleep during the day. I carry Sokka, for he is unable to traverse the rolling dunes that seem to swallow my feet with every step I take, and a makeshift sled containing water and food. Katara carries Kaya, and Toph carries Iroh. I have never felt so helpless. Death surrounds us. It is impossible to ignore.

As the sun rises on our third day, I drop to my knees and help Sokka off my back. "We'll camp here," I announce, my voice a raspy whisper. I unload the sled and set it up quickly. During the day, I shall reposition it as the orange-hued sunlight crawls along the sky. 

Katara approaches me, handing me the leather bladder with my rationed water. It's fuller than usual. "This isn't mine," I say, weighing the offering.

"Take it," she whispers pleadingly. Her lips are cracked and the sun has burned her cheeks. I can see the look in her eyes, the hopelessness and despair. She carries resignation in her shoulders. She is ready to die. Kaya and Iroh are close-by, their robust features betraying their mother's sacrifice.

She has been giving them her ration.

"Katara." I open the water and take a sip, but only a sip. "You honor me and our children. Your blessings humble me." Setting aside one of the poles that makes up part of our shelter, I kneel before her and take one of her hands in mine. "_When_ we get to Ba Sing Se…" I press my lips against her upturned palm. "…We shall marry."

Her pale eyes sparkle with emotion, and she falls to her knees. "Zuko…"

Pressing the tip of the water bag to her lips, I coax her to drink. "Please, Katara. Please drink."

She does so hesitantly, her eyes devouring mine. A shrill squeal breaks the trance. Kaya is jumping up and down and pointing toward the setting sun. "They're here! They're here! You were right! You said they would come." She points toward a small cloud on the horizon and claps.

A sand-glider emerges from the dust. Are they friend or foe? The thought is hardly a whisper in my mind as I run toward the children and prepare to fight. Instinct guides my momentum, and a floodgate opens within me. As I try to seek the core to tap into my diminished abilities, something monstrous takes hold of me. It is something not of this realm.

It is the power of Sozin's comet.

The malevolent spirit of my father hovers near it, a ghostly smile of triumph upon his lips. _"I knew you couldn't resist."_

The burnt orange haze that taints the sky turns blood red. I feel as though I am split in two. Icy fire consumes me and strips my vision.

"No, Daddy!" Kaya shrieks as though she is far away.

I cannot see her, but I can see the shadows of those surrounding her—a boy, a young woman, a large beast, and a smaller one.

_"You are stronger than this, Zuko,"_ a disembodied voice whispers into my ear. _"I know you seek only to protect your children, but there is no reason to be alarmed. The Sandbenders will see you safely to Ba Sing Se."_

In the distance, I can hear a child crying.

"Get back!" Katara's voice is the next to sound in alarm. "Kaya, no!"

_"Your children are in danger. Crush the Sandbenders,"_ my father's essence demands.

A small hand clutches mine. _"It isn't time, Daddy. Let it go. The Sandbenders are our friends. They will help us."_

The comet ceases to roar in my mind. It is as though someone has snuffed out the candle of a flame. A cool veil has descended between the madness and myself, and I fall to my knees. I feel nauseous, as though I've eaten too much at a fancy banquet.

"Zuko!" I feel Katara's touch upon my forehead. "What was that? What happened?"

I can barely keep my eyes open. I feel displaced and exhausted. "I… think I'm going to be sick," I rasp. 

"What's going on?" Toph's voice is harsh, her frustration layered with anger. "I can't see a damned thing. Did the sun crash onto the planet, or what? What was that hot blast?"

Sokka, his speech impaired by his injuries, rocks back and forth and soothes my son. "It's okay, Uncle Iroh."

Wind and sand swirl around us as the sand-glider approaches. I growl in warning as I feel the threat approaching.

"Zuko," Katara gasps, her desperate gaze boring into mine. The perfection of her beauty is marred by horror. "You're eyes…"

"What? What's wrong with them?"

"They were red," she announces with a shuddering breath. "There was smoke… coming from your mouth."

Her description reminds me of a painting in the palace—a dragon with red eyes, devouring the gate of the Spirit World.

Hugging her knees, Kaya whimpers next to me. Her eyes are shut tight, tears streaking down her cheeks. "Go 'way. Go 'way. Go 'way," she chants, whips of unearthly steam emanating from her tiny lips.

"Kaya?" Katara crawls over my legs and grasps our daughter by her shoulders. "Open your eyes, Kaya."

She refuses with a shake of her head.

"What the hell?" Toph exclaims nearby.

There is a loud crack and a thundering rushing noise. We're sinking. It's very subtle, but I cannot ignore the sensation. It is like the earth has opened and started to drain the sands of the desert.

"I'm sorry," Kaya cries. "I couldn't help it." She opens her eyes. Katara and I are frozen in horror. Her eyes are no longer the icy-blue pools like her mother's. They are dark crimson.

In an effort to save my children, I tapped into the power of the comet. The implications are too frightening to comprehend. Had my daughter saved me? If so… at what cost?

"Run!" Toph shouts, helping Sokka to his feet and scooping up Iroh. She runs toward the approaching sand-glider. "Sandquake!"

The nightmare unfolds before me in slow motion. Faith abandoned me long ago, yet I find myself praying to whatever god who will hear my humble prayer. Katara emits an unearthly scream, waving her arms about her as she summons all the water from the bags we have carried across the desert. She pulls the water into the sand. I can feel the icy fingers through the material of my boots as she creates a foothold for us to climb.

"Hurry!" she cries, the strain of concentration etched into the dark lines of her face.

Pulling Kaya onto my back, I climb out of the shifting sand and turn to help Katara. The sand glider grows closer. Kaya whispers her assurance that they are our salvation. I clasp Katara's hand as the icy foothold cracks, causing the sands to shift again.

"My lord!" a familiar voice calls over the noise of the sand and wind. "Grab the rope!"

It is difficult to see. Sand stings my eyes as tears of frustration cleanse them. I grope for the rope, miraculously grasping the lifeline and heaving Kaya, Katara, and myself to safety. "Iroh!" I bellow, unable to see, for the sand has blinded me. 

"He is safe!" the familiar voice shouts over the roar of the sand glider speeding along the desert. "As are the other two. Everyone is safe, Lord Zuko!"

I struggle to sit up, but a hand holds me down. I grasp it, feeling the muscular bulge of a masculine forearm. "Who are you?" I call out.

"Jeong Jeong, my lord," he replies over the roar of wind and sand. I hear other voices, but they are muted. Emotion overwhelms me, and I clasp the forearm of my loyal general.

"Thank Agni," I chant as exhaustion carries me into darkness.

--

TBC

Author's Note—Whew! That was fun to write! I know I said this was the last chapter of Act III. Well, I lied. Ha ha! The fun thing about the way I write is that I never know where I am going. Bwhaaa! As always, I am humbled by all who take the time to review this story. All reviews are cherished and welcome.


	35. Act III Chapter Fourteen

Act III

Chapter Fourteen

Laughter greats me as I regain consciousness. I blink, the bright amber hue of sunset streaming through the holes in the canopy of trees above me.

Trees…

Mature trees that stand as silent witness of the devastation that claimed the rest of the world. Unlike the saplings that cover the grounds of my homeland, these obviously survived the first attack of fire rain my father so carelessly hurled at his enemies.

I struggle to sit up, and someone assists me. Cold metal touches my lips. "Here," Jeong Jeong encourages softly, "drink this."

Cool water splashes onto my tongue and lips, and I gulp the contents greedily. 

"Slow down," my general growls, "or you'll make yourself sick. There is more water. Take all that you need."

I start to ask about my children, but I hear them laughing in the distance. Their laughter, accompanied with the sound of splashing water, sets my mind at ease. My surroundings are much different from the desert. A landscape of lush jungle surrounds me on all sides. "Where are we?"

"We are three days from Ba Sing Se," he answers, bending over a large cistern, scooping water with his hands, and splashing his face with it.

"What happened?" 

"The Sect of Kroni has infiltrated the mainland," he replies quickly, as if it was only a matter of time before it happened.

I have forgotten about his connection with Mahari. "Let me guess. Mahari said it would happen."

He nods solemnly. "I have no reason to doubt her visions of the future. She has been right thus far."

I know better than to question him further, and I lean backwards and close my eyes.

"We held off the Kroni as long as we could," he informs me in his gruff reporting-for-duty voice. "When I realized the battle was lost, I sounded a retreat." He pauses, obviously searching for the right words to soften the blow of what it is he has to tell me. "We… we were outnumbered and…"

I open my eyes. Jeong Jeong's face is etched with disgust.

"They desecrated those we left behind." His voice is a bare whisper. His gaze captures mine. "They are soulless creatures, Lord Zuko. What has your father unleashed upon us?"

My children's laughter interrupts the somber mood as they saunter into the campsite.

"Daddy!" Kaya squeals with delight as she rushes toward me.

--

Holding Iroh, I watch as Kaya tackles her father. Evening approaches, and I have resigned myself to a sleepless night due to the children's excitement.

"We got to ride on a sand glider, and they gave us new clothes," Kaya chatters excitedly. "See!" She lifts her arm up, which is totally immersed in a sleeve that is two sizes too big for her. "Momma says I'll grow into it."

Iroh snuggles against me and drifts off to sleep. Like his sister, he too has new clothes thanks to the Sandbenders.

"There's a river over there." She points toward the direction we came from. Iroh and I got to go swim for the first time! It was lots of fun before Momma turned it into a bath. Even Uncle Sokka and Aunt Toph got baths!"

Kaya climbs off her father and sniffs the air with exaggerated puffs. "You stink, Daddy. You need a bath! Maybe Momma can give you a bath too!"

Zuko kisses the top of our daughter's head and looks at me. He says nothing, but the look in his gaze would melt all the snow in the South Pole. I clear my throat and place Iroh on the pallet. I am slightly envious of my son's ability to sleep through anything.

"Kaya," I call softly, "come lie down. It is time for bed." True to form, she makes excuse after excuse.

"But I'm not tired," she yawns, crawling over her father and sidling up to Iroh. She touches her brother's hair and rubs its shorter strands between her fingers—a sign that she is exhausted. Mumbling brief protests around the thumb that is now in her mouth, she closes her eyes.

Sokka leans against a tree, and Toph bends the earth around her to form a small shelter. Jeong Jeong clears his throat. The others who rescued us returned to the desert once we reached the edge of this jungle. He stirs the embers in the fire that he started when we arrived.

I cannot explain it, but there is a mood that surrounds me. I spent the first several hours here, awestricken by the beauty. When I found the stream, I rushed my children toward it, determined that I would scrub them clean. It was a luxury we seldom had in the desert. Part of me wants to stay. The sensible part knows we most move on. We need to seek refuge in the underground city of Ba Sing Se.

--

Jumping to my feet, I realize that my daughter is correct. I could do with a bath. "Kaya is right," I state, walking toward the sound of water. Jeong Jeong, ever my faithful bodyguard stands to follow me, but I stay his momentum with the movement of my hand. My son is asleep. My daughter is drowsy. Toph and Sokka are resting, and Katara is fussing with a blanket.

The scene is tranquil and domestic. It should soothe my troubled thoughts, but I cannot banish the images that toy with my imagination. "My friend, please watch after my family."

I can tell by the look in his eyes that he is uneasy with the request, but I need my privacy.

"Very well, my lord," he grumbles beneath his breath.

A grin dances across my scarred lips. I had forgotten how like a mother platypus-bear Jeong Jeong could be. I stumble through the vine-rich jungle toward the river, looking forward to washing the grime from my body.

--

Kaya succumbs to sleep, and I pray that she has a restful night. Jeong Jeong paces, mumbling beneath his breath. I can tell that he is uncomfortable with letting Zuko out of his sight. In that respect, he reminds me of an overprotective father. 

Standing, I approach him. He stops pacing as if surprised to see me in his way. I hug him, wrapping my arms around his waist and burying my cheek against his shoulder. "Thank you for saving us," I whisper and kiss his scarred, leathery cheek.

Jeong Jeong clears his throat and steps away. "You are welcome," he answers gruffly. "Though we may have saved you and your family, I see now that Zuko remains intent on getting himself killed."

"What do you mean?" I ask, my curiosity piqued.

Stirring the fire, he sits next to the children. "Though he fought valiantly before our escape from the outer islands of our once great nation, he fought carelessly. The Sect of Kroni has infiltrated the old Earth Kingdom borders. The ocean was not enough to stop the spread of their disease. If they were to capture Zuko...

Not even the Avatar will be able to stop him."

His words strike a cord deep within me—one that I dared not even contemplate. _Daughter against father._

"He may have the dragon leashed, but he struggles to keep it from consuming him." Jeong Jeong stares into the fire intently.

I kneel across from him. "How do we save him?"

He shakes his head and keeps looking into the fire. "I'm not sure that we can."

--

My daughter was right. A bath is just what I needed. For the first time since I can remember, I feel… calm. Though I remain fractured, still without my memories, I am content. The jungle seems untouched by the devastation my father wrought with the fire rain.

As I recline on the riverbank, letting the cool breeze dry my tattered skin, my thoughts turn to Katara. We are three days away from Ba Sing Se, where we shall be married. I know that I should not allow the union to take place, but I am a selfish being and will tie her to me anyway. I cannot resist such a blissful temptation. Just the thought of possessing her makes my blood churn expectantly.

"Zuko?" calls Katara, interrupting my thoughts. The bushes rustle nearby, and I jump up and run toward the shadows, stepping into my pants as I go along.

"Over here," I reply as she breaks through the foliage and looks around. I step deeper into the shadows and pull my shirt over my head.

A half moon shines in the sky, silently defying the comet's celestial influence.

Turning toward the sound of my voice, she walks toward me.

"Is everything all right?" I ask, stepping out of the shadows now that I am fully clothed. Her face is in shadow, but I feel her gaze upon me. 

"Everything's fine. Everyone, except Jeong Jeong has settled down for the night," she says. "I had hoped to catch you before you were finished."

"Oh?" I grin, unable to resist teasing her. If she has seduction on her mind, I will gladly accommodate her.

I can feel the heat of her blush. "I… I thought… w-we… Since we were here… near water… I wanted to see if I could… heal some of your scars," she stammers.

Due to the limited water in the oasis, Katara had not been able to try to heal me as often as she would have liked. Though Kaya assures me that I will be healed, I am reminded of the violent network of skin that crisscrosses my body.

Katara has seen me without my shirt. Unlike the concubine who had been sent to pleasure me once I was recovered, her eyes did not widen in horror or linger in pity. Her gaze roamed over the scars with barely-veiled hunger.

Remembering the last time she touched me, my body starts to stir. "I see," I reply softly, figuring that her desire to heal me is just that, an attempt to heal me. It's nothing more… nothing less.

She closes the distance between us, cupping my left cheek with her right hand and touching my chest with her left. "Do you?"

Her question is issued like a challenge, a challenge that I dare not accept. The sound of her voice welcomes me, but I cannot see the expression on her face. I close my fingers over hers and press her palm flat against my chest. My heartbeat is erratic. I turn my head and kiss her palm. I am rewarded with the sound of her subtle intake of breath.

Standing on her toes, she presses her lips against mine. The softness hardens me, and my sex twitches. I would burn to have her.

--

Zuko is like a statue, reluctantly accepting my touch. The world could be collapsing around us, and it would make no difference. Jeong Jeong's words reverberate in my mind. I will save Zuko, even if it means my own destruction.

I look into his golden eyes as I brush my lips against his. His fingers crush mine as he prepares to turn me away. I flick my tongue against his bottom lip and pull it between my teeth.

--

Her aggressiveness decimates my precarious restraint, and I wrap my arms around her possessively. She is mine. She is my savior. I forget about my hideous scars and claim her lips in passionate abandon. She meets my thrusts boldly, taking liberties with me that make my soul sing. Her hands are beneath my loose tunic, skimming over the deep rivulets of flesh. I could come from her touch alone.

Breaking the kiss, I sigh her name, "Katara."

Her hands pull my tunic over my head, and she feels me tense.

"Please," she pleads, stepping back and removing her clothes.

I watch, fascinated and powerless to dissuade her. Before I know it, she is standing naked before me, clasping my hand in hers and pulling me toward the water like a seductive nymph. Our movements are so fluidic and graceful that I am swept up in the tide of desire and shed the last of my inhibitions. I remove my pants.

She murmurs her approval and steps into the water. A memory bubbles to the surface. At least, I think it is a memory. I close my eyes and try to recall.

--

Zuko stops. He is immovable, his eyes closed as if he is trying to figure out a deeper mystery. "Zuko?"

He opens his eyes and smiles. "We've done this before?"

I think back.

"I remember…" He shudders, grasping my hand and wading into the water with me. "I was bathing… in a river… like this. You were… watching me… spying on me. I knew you were there. I taunted you… asked you if you wanted to touch me."

"Keep going," I encourage him, reliving the embarrassing moment when he caught me spying on him the night before the comet struck.

_"Would you like to touch me, Waterbender?" he had taunted, pushing the reeds to the side and discovering my voyeurism. He had grabbed my wrist and pulled me into the open._

I fought him at first, ashamed of my curiosity and embarrassed that I wanted to feel his touch.

As I settled against him, it was as though he could not catch his breath. His breathing was ragged and his flesh was hard.

"Are you curious, Water Tribe girl?" he had mocked, rocking his naked flesh against my thigh. "Do you want to know what a man's touch feels like?"

Regaining some semblance of dignity, I retorted. "No, thank you. I'm sure your uncle prefers his women older."

"You were angry…" he whispers. "You said that my uncle would like his women older."

"Yes," I reply, coaxing him deeper into the water. "Do you remember your uncle?" I am saddened when he shakes his head. I wrap my arms around his waist and lay my cheek on his chest. "It's okay. The important thing is that you remembered something."

We stand knee deep in the stream's gentle current, offering each other solace. I run my hands up and down his back, tracing a path along the jagged skin. I shudder, angry that his father did this to him. I can only imagine the pain he must have gone through, the untold agony of surviving the burns.

"Katara?" His voice is a raged whisper.

"Yes?" I rub my cheek against his shoulder.

His hands linger at my waist as though he is afraid to touch me. "Will you… touch me?"

His question pierces my soul, and I weep. We're alive, but at what price? What kind of world will Kaya and Iroh inherit? What dangers lie ahead? I cannot linger on my doubts. My mother always told me that life is for the living. It is time I listen to her words.

"Make love to me," I say, wrapping one of my legs around him and rubbing against him suggestively.

He growls, grasping my waist and pulling me closer. His kiss is primal and desperate. He's close. I can feel his need nestled against my stomach. Breaking the kiss, he falls to his knees and lifts me. His tongue darts across my aching nipples and draws them into his mouth. His flesh pierces mine, making us one.

--

The warmth of her body and the cool caress of the river's water surround me. I feel as though I may split in two. She holds onto my shoulders and bucks against me, the slide of her feminine heat sending spirals of untold delight through me. The tide threatens to carry us away, and I twist so that we become part of it.

The sound of the water and flesh are all I hear. The persistent call of the comet is drowned out. The pressure of release builds. Katara writhes on top of me, grinding her core onto my shaft. Watching her is nirvana. Feeling her body constrict around mine pulls me closer to the elusive edge. Clutching her hips, I rock into her and moan.

I'm here in her arms, not floating in the sky with malevolence in my heart.

I'm whole.

I cling to my memory and realize that I loved this woman even then. The gift that she has given me is immeasurable. She knows who I was and who I am. Love and acceptance shine brightly in her eyes. Clutching her to me, I bury my face against her shoulder and surrender to the ecstasy.

As I squander my seed within her, the peace I have embraced shimmers around me, and memories flood into my mind. People and places are known to me. My sins…

"Oh Agni! What have I done?" I hiss, holding on to Katara, for she is my lifeline.

"Zuko?"

Tears flow down my cheeks. My head aches as remembrance is forced upon me. "I never meant to hurt you," I rasp, barely able to catch my breath.

"No, no, no," she pleads, realizing I have remembered everything and brushing my tears away with her lips. "Not like this. That wasn't you. You did it to protect us. You saved Sokka… and me."

I tremble, my cruelty toward her during our captivity etched upon my recovered memories for all times. I am humbled by her forgiveness. "I don't deserve it."

--

We are still intimately connected, like two interlocking parts destiny has seen fit to create. I grasp his head and force him to look at me. "That wasn't who you were, Zuko. That isn't who _we_ were. Don't let the bad memories overshadow the good."

His eyes are glassy. 

"Are you in pain?"

He nods, and I summon my element to heal him, but I know that it will take much more than Waterbending to heal him.

It will take time.

--

End Act III

Author's Notes—And so ends Act III. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. The story isn't completed. Act IV is the final act. With the start of school and extracurricular activities for my son, I won't have the time that I normally do to work on this story. If I must, I beg for your patience. It shall be rewarded in time.

God Bless!


	36. Act IV Chapter One

Bitter Joy

Act IV

Chapter One—

Seven years has passed since our arrival at Ba Sing Se. The once grand city had been in ruins. The death toll from my father's vengeance had been especially high here. Only the elite had known of the crystal caverns beneath the city.

They were the only ones who survived the massacre of the fire rain.

They turned us away when we arrived, shunning us for who and what I was. They had been willing to allow Katara, Toph, Sokka, and Kaya to seek shelter there, but Firebenders were not allowed.

Jeong Jeong had been incensed, but I had accepted their ruling calmly. I hated my time in the caverns beneath the Fire Nation. Though it meant splitting my family apart, I encouraged Katara to seek refuge within the Earth Kingdom caves.

She refused, and we made lives for ourselves above ground with the various refugees and militiamen who had found their way back to the city. I could not help but appreciate the irony, for most of the refugees were the ones who had been evacuated from the underground passages beneath the Fire Nation before the final offensive against Ozai.

There is no threat of the fire rains any longer. Although Sozin's comet circles the earth like a vulture around a rotting carcass, it cannot harm us. Ever since that fateful day in the desert, I have not felt its presence though I am reminded of it daily. The sky still holds the orange hue, like poison festering within an open wound.

The Sect of Kroni seemed to vanish that day. After being turned away from the crystal caverns, I thought we would be on the run forever, but the surviving soldiers who limped into the cluttered streets of Ba Sing Se regaled us of how Kroni soldiers had miraculously withdrawn even though they'd had the advantage.

Those soldiers are our protection now, stationed in the rebuilt houses surrounding ours. Katara and I do not delude ourselves even though the last seven years have been peaceful. 

Kaya is still hunted. That thought alone is enough to cause us worry, but time has not been kind to us…

Sokka died two years ago today. He came down with a fever. Katara tried to heal him, but her abilities were useless against whatever illness claimed him. 

Though she tries to hide the fact that she has been crying, I can see the strain in her shoulders and the puffiness of her eyes, the ones I fell in love with so long ago.

Though my daughter "talks" to her uncle often, she does not speak of it. It saddens Katara to know that her brother is not with her mother and father and that Sokka is trapped with the other spirits, denied access to the spirit world by whatever malevolent entity that blocks the path. 

Kaya and Iroh are twelve-years-old now.

Iroh is a prodigy, much like Azula was at his age. Jeong Jeong is tough on him, making demands on my son that I never could have. That is why Jeong Jeong is his Firebending master.

Although Kaya is talented, she struggles with her bending. Her lessons are fractured and incomplete. A pupil is only as good as its master. She has demonstrated competency in all the bending arts, but not mastery. 

She is the Avatar, the spirit of our wounded planet reborn. Aang died in the Avatar state. I saw it with my own eyes. The cycle was broken, and no one can explain how the Avatar was reborn.

Was the Avatar actually reborn?

I will never forget the day he died. I can never forget the look of surprise on Aang's face as my father's Fire Dragon pierced his heart. He seemed so invincible in his Avatar state. We were supposed to win. We were supposed to stop the comet and my father.

But that didn't happen.

Theories abound. One such theory says my daughter is the first Avatar of a new cycle, gifted not with the powers and knowledge of those before her, but with the ability to bend all of the elements to her will. This theory ties into the belief that the earth's soul is eternal. I wish now that I had paid more attention to the lessons my mother had tried to teach me.

"Give it back!" Iroh's angry voice cracks from the courtyard, interrupting my thoughts.

"I'm tellin' Dad!" Kaya screeches in retaliation.

The sound of stomping feet rushing up the stairs is loud, and I prepare myself to referee between my children, silently thanking whichever deity that Katara has gone back to bed. Opening the door, I step into the hallway.

Kaya reaches me first, holding her a hand to her head. "Daddy!"

She must be in trouble. She only calls me daddy when she's done something wrong. Placing my finger to my lips, I shush my daughter. "Your mother has gone back to bed. She isn't feeling well."

Iroh bounds up the stairs and draws breath to shout too, but he sees the expression on my face and realizes that his mother is resting.

I shepherd my children down the stairs. As soon as they reach the bottom landing, they begin to plead their cases.

"Kaya took my practice sword," Iroh whines, "and she won't give it back."

I hide my smile. Kaya has bested her brother in swordplay again. It wounds Iroh's pride that his sister is better than he is with the wooden broadswords I crafted for them. The parallel between my childhood and theirs is so similar. Although Kaya looks like Katara, she reminds me of myself. The weight of responsibilities that should never belong to a child reflects in her gaze like ghostly wisps of smoke. Whereas Iroh may look like me, I fear he has Azula's prideful spirit. 

Kaya removes her hand, revealing the singed bangs. "_He_ burned my hair, Daddy!" she sniffled. "I won the sword honorably. When I wouldn't give it back, he used his fire whip against me!"

Touching the dark strands of her hair, I try to think of ways to disguise the obvious destruction of her hair loops and bangs. Of all the days for my children to fight! Why today!

"_She_ used her water whip against me!" Iroh rubs a red mark on his cheek. 

Bowing my head in defeat, I sigh. "Iroh, go to your room."

He scoffs and begins to argue, but I raise my head and give him a look that brokers no argument.

"I should have known you would take her side," he grumbles, stomping up the stairs. The resounding slam of his door heralds his arrival there. 

Kaya's sniffles miraculously stop, and she wipes her tears away with the sleeve of her tunic.

"Give me both swords," I demand, holding my hand out. "When you and your brother can demonstrate the proper respect for one another, you may have them back."

Unlike her brother, Kaya does not argue and quickly hands the wooden swords to me. I place them on the table and turn to my daughter. "I don't care who started it. The fact that both of you used bending to fight each other disturbs me."

A small squeak erupts from my daughter as she begins to cry.

I walk into the kitchen area and collect a knife. Wielding it with a skill that is inherent to me, I approach my daughter. "We won't be able to hide this from your mother. Should I be the one to tell her why your hair is cut or you?"

Kaya sobs silently, her shoulders shaking.

"Be still," I caution her, gathering the un-singed hair loop in one hand and cutting it with the knife to even out the cut.

"Is it true?" she whispers sullenly, gathering the fallen hair in her hand and rubbing it curiously.

"Is what true?" I ask, bracing myself. Though I have learned many things about my children over the years, I know that when Kaya begins to ask questions, I had better have some answers. Either that, or find someone who does. She always mumbles to herself. I forget that she can see a world that we cannot.

"Uncle Sokka…" She lowers her voice and looks over her shoulder to make certain her mother is not in the room. "Uncle Sokka says Mom has two souls inside her… a new spirit that will grow and become its own body."

I feel the blood drain from my cheeks. My daughter's ability to speak with the spirits has come in handy on several occasions. They keep her safe. They provide her with comforts I could never imagine. Knowing that my uncle, Aang, and Sokka are watching over her has soothed me upon numerous occasions. Realizing Azula's spirit is near makes me uneasy.

But to find out that my wife is with child…

I'm amazed. I thought my injuries would prevent such a thing from happening. Anxiety and happiness war within me. "Are you certain?" I whisper.

Kaya nods. "Does it mean mom is going to have a baby?"

"I don't know," I answer softly. "Go to your room. Do not come out until the next meal is served."

Kaya bows her head, acknowledging her punishment for using the water whip against her brother. "Yes, sir."

Following her up the stairs, my mind dwells on the possibility of what she has told me. It isn't that I wouldn't welcome another child… No matter how hard I try, I cannot temper the joy that has bloomed in my heart. Although the guilt over missing so much of Kaya and Iroh's lives isn't all consuming, it lingers. A new guilt has taken its place. What kind of life can I provide for it? Who would bring a child into a world that teeters on the brink of destruction?

I open the door to our sitting room. We lead a comfortable life. It isn't as though we have servants waiting on us hand and foot, but Katara's healing abilities have earned us a place of esteem in the village that surrounds us. We are valued members of the community even though we never asked to be.

Entering the bedroom, I pause. Muted rays of sunlight caress my wife's slumbering curves. I devour her appearance. I can't believe that she is still mine. After everything that has happened…

I catch myself, determined not to dwell on the past.

Divesting myself of clothing, I pull the blanket back and kneel on our pallet. As careful as I am, my wife shifts, signaling that she is awake. 

"What were they arguing about now?" she asks, her voice raspy with sleep.

I pull her into my arms, pillowing her head on one of them and touching her stomach with the other. I place a gentle kiss on her cheek and sigh, realizing I might as well tell her about our daughter's hair now rather than later.

"Kaya bested Iroh at swordplay, and she wouldn't give him his sword back," I inform her. "They…dueled."

Katara grows tense. "Are they all right?"

"Yes," I reply, "but I had to cut Kaya's singed hair so that it is even." I hold my breath and wait for her reaction. Her eyes are closed, and she begins to tremble in my arms. Her face is covered in shadows. I start to ponder if there was a better way to tell her, feeling guilty for making her cry, and then she snorts.

She's laughing. She turns her head, and I can see her face. Tears streak down her cheeks she's laughing so hard. "Do you…" She gasps for air. "Remember the time I cut her hair so short. You were so angry with me."

I nod, unable to contain my smile.

"They dueled then," she chuckles. "Iroh and his fire whip…"

"I'll have Jeong Jeong speak to him about—"

"_You_ need to speak to him about it, Zuko," she states emphatically, patting my arm. "Jeong Jeong is his Firebending master, not his father. You are his father and you are Kaya's."

My breath catches in my throat as her fingers intertwine with mine and press against her stomach. "Katara…" My voice is thick with emotion. 

She smiles, the graceful curve of her lips offering a serene oasis for my soul. "And you are this one's father as well," she whispers, tilting her head for my kiss.

There are no words to express my gratitude. I am thankful she has accepted the news well. Excitement blooms in my heart, and I brush my lips against hers. "Kaya knows."

Katara rolls her eyes. "Nosey spirits."

--

TBC

Author's Notes: As always, I am amazed over the response this story gets. Thanks to all who have reviewed. It is greatly appreciated. I must admit that I almost abandoned this story based on the season three preview. I was so angry over that scene where Zuko is talking to Iroh. I started wondering how I was going to write a "sympathetic" Zuko. Then I smacked myself upside the head and reminded myself that my story was an alternate universe story anyway. So, I guess what I'm saying is this… If I haven't updated in a while, leave a review or email me. Feel free to pester me. It keeps the muse jumping. You can even instant message me at looneyluna200 on AIM and YIM. At least, I think those are my screen names.


	37. Act IV Chapter Two

Act IV

Chapter Two

--

Staring into the stained mirror, I run my hand over my flat stomach. Happiness eludes me. It is within my grasp, but it is only an illusion. The shadows of my life darken my spirit. Uncertainty plagues me. Though we have lived peacefully for the last seven years, I cannot repress the sense of foreboding that has lessened me.

Zuko assures me we are safe, but I cannot shake the feeling that something is changing.

_"Something is changing," he whispered against my cheek, caressing my stomach. "You will be ripe with child soon. My child. I'll be here for you this time, Katara. I won't abandon you. I'd die before sending you away again._

He is my anchor in the stormy sea of life. Kaya is the breeze that blows gently, and Iroh is the warmth. Though I have lost so much, I have gained things beyond measure. My life is full.

I should be content.

I should be happy.

But I cannot ignore the dangers. The orange hue that hovers in the sky is a constant reminder of the threats my daughter faces—threats I would gladly face myself if I could. How does one fight an enemy one cannot see?

As if affirming my fears, warning bells clang in the distance. Shouts rend the serene streets below. Running from the room, I call for Kaya and Iroh.

--

Hurrying toward the watchtower, I mentally prepare myself. The men of the village rally around me, and we make our way toward the western tower. Women and children evacuate toward the east, seeking shelter in the reconstructed cellars.

Instinct demands I find Katara and the children, but it commands that I stand and fight. I trust my wife. She protected Kaya and Iroh the first years of their lives. I trust her to do so now.

Men are yelling as I climb the steps to our defensive walls. Our walls are nothing like the once-grand walls of Ba Sing Se, but they are guarded, and the guards are loyal. There is no elemental distinction anymore—no Earth Kingdom versus Fire Nation. One cannot exist without the other. Conquest and war are meaningless.

Reaching the top of the wall, I run across. From my vantage point, flaming arrows have been drawn and pointed toward the ground. The guards I push my way through are silent. The ones who have their weapons drawn are ordering someone to leave. I shove the guards who are watching the display out of my way and climb the ladder to the top of the tower.

"Leave now, and you will not be harmed, old man!" Nolan shouts, holding his fist in the air, holding the volley of deadly weapons back.

There is no reply from below. I cannot see through the smoke of the fire arrows. "Who is it?" I ask sharply.

Nolan, one of the surviving members of my original command, does not flinch. His hand remains steady, and he glares through the smoke. "He says his name is Pathik. He says he has information for you and your wife."

My spine stiffens. The name sounds familiar, but I cannot remember a face. "Stand down," I command Nolan, who extinguishes the flames with an efficient Firebending maneuver.

Once the smoke clears, I am able to see a poised figure. The dark-skinned man sits with crossed-legs in a meditative pose. His belongings sit beside him. He is the man who helped Katara rescue us from the outer islands of the Fire Nation. He is the man who controlled the Sandbenders.

He is Mahari's father.

The sense of dread is a cold embrace. "Open the gate," I whisper harshly; hoping fate has not betrayed us all.

"Sir?" questions Nolan.

"Open the gate," I repeat. "Let him in. Place guards with him at all times."

"Yes sir!" Nolan snaps and relays my orders.

--

Worried whispers flow through the hidden basement. The fear is palpable. I can taste it rising in my throat. Instinct dictates that I run… that I hold my children close and carry them away from danger. There was a time I would have fought. Those times seem so long ago—a time where the world had hope. 

"Don't worry, Mom," Kaya sighs, the pitch of her voice otherworldly. "Everything is going to be all right."

I kiss the top of her head and hold my hand out to Iroh, who turns his back in a pout.

"I should be up there fighting," he growls aggressively.

"They're not fighting," Kaya states firmly. "They have opened the gate to let the dark-skinned man in." Her gaze is focused on a vacant spot on the floor, her head cocked as if she is listening to someone.

"Kaya?" I shift, moving from a sitting position to my knees.

Iroh rolls his eyes. "Talkin' to the spooks again."

Kaya ignores Iroh's insult. When they were younger, they were inseparable. Now they are sniping at one another, jealousy a thickened crust between them.

"What dark-skinned man, Kaya?" I ask.

She doesn't answer me at first, seemingly lost in another world. "The man who gave you the shiny flag and a boat. He helped you rescue Daddy and the General. He helped you get home."

"Pathik." I close my eyes.

"I don't know his name," Kaya replies. There is a slight pause. "But I know why he's here."

I nod encouragingly, trying to get her to tell me.

Her blue gaze locks onto mine, and she touches my hair lovingly. "He wants to tell us the story."

--

TBC

Author's Notes: I know the chapter is short. It's a transitional chapter before I get into the meaty part of the story. I do apologize for the wait, especially if you were expecting something longer. Anyway, all reviews are greatly appreciated. Some of you asked why I fast-forwarded the story. So, I would like to take the time to address that now. Simply put, I felt a five-year-old would have a difficult time saving the world. Aging Iroh and Kaya is vital to the story.


	38. Act IV Chapter Three

Act IV

Author's Notes—

Yeah, I'm alive! Thanks to all who sent well wishes! I made a New Year's resolution that I would not have any surgeries this year. So far, so good. I won't bore you with the details of my health, but I must get on my soapbox and get a little preachy. Take care of yourself now. You only have the parts that God gave you. If you think you are immortal or that things will never happen to you, you'll be surprised and disappointed when you find out differently. Exercise. Eat right. Learn from your mistakes. In the end, you will thank yourself.

Sermon over. On with the story. As always, reviews are most welcome. Any mistakes are my own. No copyright infringement intended.

Act IV

Chapter Three

My world has started to unravel. From the moment the Fire Nation attacked our tribe, my life changed. I was thrust from childhood into adulthood in the rising and setting of one sun, a fateful fact I never dwelled on until now. I never wallowed in bitterness. I never lamented the loss of my childhood.

I wanted so much more for my children, but the dark-skinned man in front of me has shattered the illusion that they would ever lead normal lives. Fear has guided me to this day, my nightmares mocking my feeble attempts to prevent fate from taking Kaya away.

I cannot interfere. Kaya has a destiny, and she must be free to pursue it, but it doesn't mean I have to like it.

I glare at Pathik suspiciously, unable to determine the old seer's true motivations. He is a stranger here, his mere presence violating the founding pact of our small community and my serenity. His dark gaze is unwavering as he sits on the floor, clutching a dusty scroll to his concave chest. I make no effort to conceal my thoughts, for I cannot quell my suspicions. Though he helped me rescue Zuko, I cannot trust the man. We have lived in peace for the last seven years; a peace that he has shattered.

"I know you do not trust me, young Waterbender," he says softly, placing the scroll on the straw mat with reverence and care.

I scoff, not because he has stated the obvious, but because he called me young. I have a difficult time recalling my youth, my aspirations for the future mired in the tragedy of the past. "Can you blame me?" I reply.

Zuko covers my hand with his. "Though I am indebted to you for saving our lives, you cannot stay here. We do not let outsiders into the city. Everyone knows of Kaya. They know who and what she is and have sworn to protect her," he informs Pathik.

"He isn't staying, Daddy," Kaya blurts from behind the thin screen before sliding the door open.

"Go to your room!" I command, furious that she has disobeyed our wishes.

Kaya is insistent, her shoulders squared with determination as she steps into the room. "I know why he's here. He's only trying to help. Did you honestly think _we_ would live like this forever?" she asks me.

Her words strike at my fragile soul. Our lives have become commonplace and calm, even with the threat of my daughter's destiny hanging over our heads. I want things to remain as they are. I want my children to have the things I never had. Is it selfish of me to do so? Is it selfish of me to sacrifice the fate of the world? Kaya is the Avatar, destined to restore balance to the world.

Kaya sits between Pathik and Zuko. I cannot see the expression on Kaya's face, but I can hear the emotion in her words. "You will see your daughter again," she whispers, grasping the old man's weathered cheeks and kissing them.

His dark brown eyes shine with tears. "Thank you, child."

Wiping his tears away with the sleeve of her robe, Kaya settles next to him. Pathik unrolls the scroll and clears his throat. "The Prophecy of the Destroyer."

Bowing my head, I close my eyes and listen.

"No one knows how Kroni came to power, but his reign of terror is well documented," the seer says, his voice thick with emotion. "There were volumes of his… deeds in the burned section of Wan Shi Tong's library, but the Spirit of Knowledge would allow only this scroll to leave his library."

"The library was buried long ago," I hiss accusingly, jumping from my perch and bending the water from my leather bladder. Kaya shields Pathik, and Zuko grabs me from behind, his arms around me, causing the water to splash to the floor. "He's a spy!"

"Katara," Zuko growls, the edge in his voice and his touch soothing my nerves.

Pathik is shaken, his voice trembling as he defends himself. "The Great Spirit Owl came for me himself. He entrusted the knowledge contained in this scroll to me. I must return it to him by the rising of the full moon. If I fail to do so, my life is forfeit."

I have difficulty believing what I am hearing. The full moon is tonight. One thing I know about the Spirit Owl is that he guards his knowledge with a zealot's fervent passion and does not suffer fools lightly, if at all.

"Surely, he will make an exception," Zuko says, a note of hope edging into his concern for the old seer.

Pathik smiles, but it does not reach his dark, chocolate eyes. "My fate is sealed. Rest easy, Lord Zuko. I am comfortable with it."

"But you are supposed to see Mahari again," protests Kaya.

"I chose a different path," Pathik announces with a small shrug to his shoulders. "One that brings you this." He motions toward the scroll. "Listen well…"

Crawling onto my lap, Kaya seeks comfort. Brave tears fall down her cheeks, tears shed for the fate of the old man that sits before us.

Unfurling the scroll, he begins to read.

"Hope shall die as destruction reigns,

The blood of Agni shall be consumed by His rays.

"Forged by fire and cleansed by blood,

Two shall be known only as one.

"One child shall see the truth,

And wield all elements with balanced couth.

"The other shall see only deceit,

Following it blindly as he shuffles his feet.

"Those who pass shall know no rest,

Until the gate is smashed within its nest.

"The sky shall bleed until the time,

When a mortal spirit is sacrificed on Kroni's shrine.

"Fate shall play until it bends,

And all will seek destruction's end."

Pathik finishes the reading and closes his eyes.

"What does it mean?" I ask, my stomach clenching in dread as Kaya slides from my lap and studies a spot on the wall.

"The first part is about Ozai killing Aang," my daughter cites with chilling accuracy. "Forged in fire and cleansed by blood… That is how the Fire sages knew of our birth. They forced Daddy to rape you. Iroh and I had to be born of a union between fire and water."

"That isn't true!" I protest, seeing the truth in Kaya's eyes. I have never told my children of the circumstances surrounding their birth. The ugliness of what was forced upon us. "Your father and I have always loved one another." Zuko moves to my side and wraps his arms around me.

My daughter pays no attention to my protestation. "Iroh and I were supposed to be one person. That's why I'm not very good bending the elements." It's as though Kaya is in a daze. Her voice is a flat monotone, her words chillingly accurate. She turns, her blue gaze shimmering with unshed tears.

"Kaya?" I whisper shakily, witnessing the destruction of my daughter's innocence. Something is terribly wrong.

Zuko tenses beside me. "What is it?"

The pool of unshed tears cede to gravity and spill down Kaya's ashen cheeks. "Iroh's gone. He's the one who sees only deceit. Grandfather has tricked him."

Running out of the room, Katara's frantic voice calls out for Iroh. I am torn. Do I chase after my wife or offer comfort to my daughter. But the panicked calls from the street below capture my attention.

"Fire Lord Zuko!" Nolan's voice is faint. "Come quickly!"

Looking out the window, my attention is drawn to the eerie glow of flames as they crawl across the rooftops, consuming everything and everyone in their path. I grab Kaya and run to the courtyard. Pathik follows. The fire is far from our villa and will not reach it.

"The fire is almost contained, my lord," Nolan reports succinctly, he pauses. His face is covered in soot, hesitation etched in the youthful lines. He eyes Pathik warily.

"Tell me," I command.

It is then I see the tears spill down his cheeks. "Jeong Jeong is dead, my lord…"

Kaya jerks in my arms and sobs relentlessly.

"…Killed by your son," Nolan chokes, his gaze full of fear. He looks at Kaya. "I saw him, my lord. Saw it with my own eyes. Saw him run Jeong Jeong through with the broadswords. He looked at me and told me to give you a message. He said killing the general the way you killed him was only the beginning. Then he started the fire, and then… a winged beast swooped from the sky and carried him away."

TBC

Author's Notes—

I welcome comments and criticism. Please feel free to email me or instant message me. I'm on AIM and looneyluna200 and YIM .


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